PDA

View Full Version : hitchWORLD© Exclusive®: TRUE STORY: hitchWORLD© representin' at the NEW ROTH ARMY™!!!



hitch1969©
01-01-2004, 06:07 PM
I've recieved over 3000 emails in the past 3 days, all wanting to know several things:

Is it true that the GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING DIAMOND DAVID LEE ROTH ARMY™ is coming back and when???

What happened to hitchWORLD© and how is hitch1969© and his small yet virile hitchCOCK©?

Viagra and Xanax for cheap over the internet??? ENLARGE YOUR PENIS FOR PENNIES ON THE DOLLhair™!!!

uh uh uhuhuhuh uuh uh uh uhuhuh uh

First of all, due to ongoing legalities, hitchWORLD© Legal™ has advised me not to speak about this. However, like the "I can do anything" attitude displayed by Micheal "the pederass" Jackson on 60 minutes so painfully for the entire world to see, I am here to SPILL THE BEANS because I CAN!!!

It was like this....

Fucking Vonnie called a little CUNT™ hacker named Hardknockz®. Vonnie had ALSO heard the rumors about this site coming back, and since he had essentially RIPPED IT OFF and stole the fucking audience based on that premise, he was a little worried that his website would still suck into oblivion MINUS a few thousand members coming back HERE.

Hardknockz went to work. He infiltrated my hosting company using a stealth trojan which he obtained from some fucking Germans™ who are into shit porn. He went so far as to register a domain and opt into cheap hosting with my hosting service. He made a few calls and kissed some ass and licked some COCKS so he could get onto the same shared server that hitchworld was physically on.

He put the trojan to work, which wiped out MY site, and thousands of others on that server AND ALL THE BACKUPS of these sites!!!

How he fucking did it exactly, only the FBI (who is investigating currently) knows for sure.

Oh yeah, they tell me not to talk about this... but I figure, HEY I've GOT NOTHING TO HIDE. I'm innocent, they are guilty!!!

They did it, and they will pay.

check out what the hosting service posted in regards to this:


Guys and Gals as I type this, I hate to break it to everyone on the staff and team, the culprit had managed to get into the server and wipe out the backups we had, this is the first time something of this magnitude has happened to us.

At this point we will need to recreate accounts manually and every user will have to reupload, we are victims just like you are and we are not going to take this lightly, we will pursue this culprit to the highest extension of the law possible.

this is a major disaster that will not be taken lightly in court of law

So I headed over to Vonnies.... and GUESS WHAT???

no hitch1969© account!!!

hmmmm......

Then, I was IMing with AllyKat. I asked her to make a post for me. She did, ever so lovingly with her hot 18 year old pussy in hand thinking about the small yet virile hitchCOCK©, aching for it inside her:

Ally_Kat
who said what to who now?

Registered: Oct 2002
Location: nyc
Posts: 1682
Member Number: 48

DLRarmy back, hitchWORLD© Ghandi™

"incoming transmission from the recently hacked hitch1969©"...

DEAR FLAPPO: (stop)

alert sir denis® and the telegoona©. (stop)

VONNIE IS A TRAITOROUS CUNT™ (stop)

the ONE and ONLY Diamond fucking David Lee Roth Army is BACK to reclaim the KWEENvon's thone!!! (stop)

http://www.dlrarmy.com/

STOP

Now, all the fucking TWO FACED BASTARDS who posted all kindsa shit about anything other than David Lee and Van Halen can STAY WITH THE CHEATING WHORE VONNIE™ (stop)

The real fans that vonnie stole can CUM™ home to the original Diamond David Lee Roth Army!!!(stop)

Do you know... where you're going to? (stop)

Do you like the things that Vonnie's SHOWING YOU?? (stop)

do you know? Vonnie may have been SO threatened that he hacked hitchWORLD© offa da net... butt™... fucking Darth cannot deny the Yoda Choda®!!!

The undersized TAIL bows to the the alpha dog

Vonnie, this is the beginning of the END™ of you stealing your friend's fucking website. Hope that Bandwidth was something that you liked paying for, pallie. You can save your fucking coinage from now on. As per the Bible™, as written by J.C.™, and endorsed by hitchWORLD©. these are the END OF DAYS™, Governor Schwarzenegger

You may surrender your fleet at the Roth fuckin' Army!!!!

uh uh u huh uh uh u hu huh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh

oh man this is kewl

and now it is time for SPELLINK™

do the catflap! (stop)

vonnie=cunt0
hitch0=cunt0
flappo=cunt0
crappy=new year

hack me crack me motherfucking teabag me

1 is 2
2 is free
3 is too much
4 is GAY©

VIVA dlrarmy!!!

cunt to 10 say it again!!!

=h69=

ps-
Roth Army is BACK!!!

http://www.dlrarmy.com/

hitchworld is DEAD

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged


And then guess what???

This post was ERASED...

by WHO???

Hardknockz™!!!!!

SURVEY SAYS:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
GUILTY®!!!

oh yes, my friends. This little internet drama is steep and grand. Someone's going to JAIL over this shit, and I dont even have to do any of the work to get this done!!!

You know, since I am the franchise playa here, and since hitchWORLD© was sew kewl like the coolest place on the internet that ever was, I have been doing some thinking...

it's never easy being a SUPERSTAR with a small yet virile penis. People often ask the hitchBRAIN©:

WHY?

why do you DO it, hitch? What's it all for? Just how many yachts can you waterski behind???? Is this what it's all about??? Eating? Drinking? FUCKING? sucking?

There's a BAD GUY™ coming through!!!

and SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE hitchCOCK©!!!

uh uh uhuh uh u hu hu hu hu hu hu hu huh uhuh

cunt~! Cunt~! cunt~!

=h69=

Elitest
01-01-2004, 06:11 PM
How can a penis be so small and yet so virile ?
I want to see a pic

Forget about the other stuff

It will make you ill

:cool:

flappo
01-01-2004, 06:17 PM
..he can lick his eyebrows

hitch1969©
01-01-2004, 06:21 PM
Originally posted by Elitest
How can a penis be so small and yet so virile ?
I want to see a pic

Forget about the other stuff

It will make you ill

:cool:

You really have a ******tive attitude, ya know?

ok... first, heres a picture of me and my METAL HAIR™. I'll post the small yet virile hitchcock in a few moments...

hitch1969©
01-01-2004, 06:23 PM
oh wait... I think that's Hardknockz™!!!

whoooops!

ok... onto the small yet virile hitchcock...

gimme a few to pull it out of it's shell. :)

=h69=

Elitest
01-01-2004, 06:27 PM
( drumming fingers on table top)


whistling...........

( ahem!!!!!!!.......practising throat clearing...... )

GAR
01-01-2004, 06:41 PM
HOWLEE™ FUNKUNN...

CRAP~! CRAP~! CRAP~! CRAP~! CRAP~!

*is this TROO-OO®???

http://www.smithsonianmag.si.edu/smithsonian/issues99/feb99/images/mongol.jpg

Why, KNOCKZ - why do joo did do deez teengz to =H69= and why teenk you geddiwhey eet??

DISSENTION! THIS IS CLEARLY DISSENTION~!

flappo
01-01-2004, 06:44 PM
..knock on wood

flappo
01-01-2004, 06:47 PM
http://sdbnl.ranttv.com/resources/kevover/baded1.jpg

or

http://www.sillyjokes.co.uk/images/dress-up/wigs/rocker.jpg

hitch1969©
01-01-2004, 06:51 PM
Originally posted by flappo
http://sdbnl.ranttv.com/resources/kevover/baded1.jpg

or

http://www.sillyjokes.co.uk/images/dress-up/wigs/rocker.jpg

that looks like our Hardknockz!!!

and look, he's made THE NEWS™:

flappo
01-01-2004, 06:55 PM
is that uhuhuhuh or uh oh ?

GAR
01-01-2004, 06:55 PM
IT IS SO WRITTEN! SO BE IT.

HAIL HITCHWORLD!

PROSECUTORS WILL BE TRANSGRESSICUTED.

flappo
01-01-2004, 07:12 PM
..only prob. is , what's da knockz got as collateral ?

..a few dozen poison albums and a greasy mullet

..that wont stand up in court !!

diamond den™
01-01-2004, 07:17 PM
It looks like Von's will disappear like a bunch of EVERYTHING else now.....oh well.......

:)

flappo
01-01-2004, 07:44 PM
..nah , it's useful for keeping that sad cunt where he belongs

hitch1969©
01-02-2004, 01:51 AM
PUSSY PIE™!!!

uh uh uh uh uh uh u huh uh uh h

=h69=

Elitest
01-02-2004, 04:52 AM
I like Vons site

There are some nice people there...

like Cato and Flappo and Gar ....etc

ZahZoo
01-02-2004, 09:53 AM
Sounds like recycled HitchConspiricies... May be time for a psychosis upgrade ole Hitch... ;)

LOL trojon wiped out the backups eh??? What... did the little perv jizz all over the tapes from his pathetic hard drive or another tale from the technology impaired ward..?

flappo
01-02-2004, 10:30 AM
..who's this cun, i mean prick ?

Elitest
01-02-2004, 11:20 AM
you see ?

you CAN do it !

I'm proud of you

Top Jimmy
01-02-2004, 02:10 PM
uh HUH

Elitest
01-02-2004, 02:27 PM
Let me guess....

Flappo and Grimsdale stand over the lifeless body of Dracula ( or it could be Elvis) and try to revive him with lashings of cherry jam ?

Top Jimmy
01-02-2004, 02:36 PM
no, but that DOES describe my most recent experience with a prostitute though......

flappo
01-02-2004, 02:56 PM
..is that joe rogan ?

Figs
11-03-2004, 01:37 PM
You work shy set of bastards, what's the point of you coming in? Sit up straight you bone idle lazy cunt!