Carmine
02-10-2005, 10:13 AM
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!". Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you may now respond in an intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced 6 children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt and their twins, Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later remarried Ted Sherlock, and, because her kids were living with them, she thought it best to also keep her former name. From this day she was known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile; Dip Schitt married loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt. Two of the other 6 children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseperable during their childhood and married the happens brothers in a dual ceremony: The Schitt-Happens wedding!
The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned home with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now, when someone says "you don't know Jack Schitt," you can correct them.
Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced 6 children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt and their twins, Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later remarried Ted Sherlock, and, because her kids were living with them, she thought it best to also keep her former name. From this day she was known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile; Dip Schitt married loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt. Two of the other 6 children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseperable during their childhood and married the happens brothers in a dual ceremony: The Schitt-Happens wedding!
The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned home with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now, when someone says "you don't know Jack Schitt," you can correct them.
Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt