flappo
05-10-2005, 03:53 PM
Joe's Garage
Packard Goose
19 November 1979, 11:34 min
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals)
Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals)
Ike Willis (lead vocals)
Peter Wolf (keyboards)
Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals)
Ed Mann (percussion)
Vinnie Colaiuta (drums)
Joe: (clutching the hood ornament of an ancient car)
Maybe you thought I
was the Packard Goose
Or the Ronald
MacDonald of the
nouveau-abstruse
Well fuck all them
people, I don't
need no excuse
For being what I am
Do you hear me, then?
All them rock 'n roll
writers is the worst
kind of sleaze
Selling punk like
some new kind of
English disease
Is that the wave
of the future?
Aw, spare me please!
Oh no, you gotta go
Who do you write for?
I wanna know
I believe you is the
government's whore
And keeping peoples
dumb is where you're
coming from
And keeping peoples
dumb is where you're
coming from
Fuck all them writers
with the pen in
their hand
I will be more
specific so they
might understand
They can all
kiss my ass
But because it's
so grand
They'd best just
stay away
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, Joe, who
did you blow?
Moe pushed
the button boy
And you went
to the show
Better suck a little
harder or the shekels
won't flow
And I don't mean
your thumb
So on your knees
you bum
Just tell yourself
it's yum
And suck it 'till
you're numb
Journalism's
kinda scary
And of it
we should be wary
Wonder what became
of Mary?
And no sooner has he wondered, a vision of Mary appears to him, delivering a little lecture...
Voice Of Mary's Vision:
Hi! It's me...
the girl from the bus...
Remember?
The last tour?
Well...
Information is
not knowledge
Knowledge is
not wisdom
Wisdom is not truth
Truth is not beauty
Beauty is not love
Love is not music
Music is THE BEST...
Wisdom is the domain
of the Wis
(which is extinct).
Beauty is a French
phonetic corruption
Of a short cloth
neck ornament
Currently in
resurgence...
And no sooner has she spoken (which is awkward and probably incorrect but what the fuck), enormous flabby short cloth neck ornaments obscure the horizon in a multitude, beating their ugly wings and working their hidden chrome snap attachments as they resurge in the direction of the White Zone seeking snack material near the Utensil Shrines of Greater America...
Joe:
If you're in the
audience and like
what we do
Well, we want you
to know that we
like you all too
But as for the
sucker who will
write the review
If his mind
is prehensile
(His mind
is prehensile)
He'll put down
his pencil
(He'll put down
his pencil)
And have
himself a squat
On the Cosmic Utensil
(Cosmic Utensil)
Go give it all you got
On the Cosmic Utensil
(Cosmic Utensil)
Sit 'n spin until you rot
On the Cosmic Utensil
(Cosmic Utensil)
He really needs
to squat
On the Cosmic Utensil
(Cosmic Utensil
Cosmic Utensil)
Now that I got that
over with
I'll just play my
imaginary guitar again
Hey...
soundin' pretty good!
Hey...get down, me...
Boy, what an
imagination!
Love myself better
than I love myself...
I think...
What tone!
Sounds like an
Elegant Gypsy!
What is that?
Musk?
It's hip!
http://www.science.uva.nl/~robbert/zappa/files/jpg/Joe_s_Garage.jpg
http://www.foggys-funnies.com/o/wtc-guy/wtc.jpg
http://www.anthemamerica.com/wtc/cU46398.jpg
Joe's Garage
Joe's Garage
19 November 1979, 6:10 min.
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals)
Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals)
Ike Willis (lead vocals)
Peter Wolf (keyboards)
Tommy Mars (keyboards)
Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals)
Ed Mann (percussion)
Vinnie Colaiuta (drums)
Jeff (tenor saxophone)
Marginal Chagrin (baritone saxophone)
Stumuk (bass saxophone)
Dale Bozzio (vocals)
Al Malkin (vocals)
Craig Steward (harmonica)
A boring old garage in a residential area with a teen-age band rehearsing in it. JOE (the main character in the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER'S Special Presentation) sings to us of the trials and tribulations of garage-band husbandry.
Central Scrutinizer:
We take you now, to a garage, in Canoga Park.
Frank Zappa:
(It makes it's own sauce...)
Joe:
It wasn't very large
There was just enough room to cram the drums
In the corner over by the Dodge
It was a fifty-four
With a mashed up door
And a cheesy little amp
With a sign on the front said "Fender Champ"
And a second hand guitar
It was a Stratocaster with a whammy bar
At this point, LARRY (a guy who will eventually give up music and earn a respectable living as a roadie for a group called Toad-O) joins in the song...
Larry:
We could jam in Joe's Garage
His mama was screamin'
His dad was mad
We was playin' the same old song
In the afternoon 'n' sometimes we would
Play it all night long
It was all we knew, 'n' easy too
So we wouldn't get it wrong
All we did was bend the string like...
Hey!
Down in Joe's Garage
We didn't have no dope or LSD
But a coupla quartsa beer
Would fix it so the intonation
Would not offend yer ear
And the same old chords goin' over 'n' over
Became a symphony
We would play it again 'n' again 'n' again
'Cause it sounded good to me
ONE MORE TIME!
We could jam in Joe's Garage
His mama was screamin',
"TURN IT DOWN!"
We was playing' the same old song
In the afternoon 'n' sometimes we would
Play it all night long
It was all we knew, and easy too
So we wouldn't get it wrong
Even if you played it on a saxophone
We thought we was pretty good
We talked about keepin' the band together
'N' we figured that we should
'Cause about this time we was gettin' the eye
From the girls in the neighborhood
They'd all come over 'n' dance around
like...
Twenty teen-age girls dash
in and go STOMP-CLAP,
STOMP-CLAP-CLAP...
So we picked out a stupid name
Had some cards printed up for a coupla bucks
'N' we was on our way to fame
Got matching suits 'N' Beatle Boots
'N' a sign on the back of the car
'N' we was ready to work in a GO-GO Bar
ONE TWO THREE FOUR
LET'S SEE IF YOU GOT SOME MORE!
People seemed to like our song
They got up 'n' danced 'n' made a lotta noise
An' it wasn't 'fore very long
A guy from a company we can't name
Said we oughta take his pen
'N' sign on the line for a real good time
But he didn't tell us when
These "good times" would be somethin'
That was really happenin'
So the band broke up
An' it looks like
We will never play again...
Joe:
Guess you only get one chance in life
To play a song that goes like...
(And, as the band plays their little song,
MRS. BORG (who keeps her son SY,
in the closet with the vacuum cleaner)
screams out the window...
Mrs. Borg:
Turn it down!
Turn it DOWN!
I have children sleeping here...
Don't you boys know any nice songs?
Joe:
(Speculating on the future)
Well the years was rollin' by, yeah
Heavy Metal 'n' Glitter Rock
Had caught the public eye, yeah
Snotty boys with lipstick on
Was really flyin' high, yeah
'N' then they got that Disco thing
'N' New Wave came along
'N' all of a sudden I thought the time
Had come for that old song
We used to play in "Joe's Garage"
And if I am not wrong
You will soon be dancin' to...
Central Scrutinizer:
The WHITE ZONE is
for loading and
unloading only. If you
gotta load or unload,
go to the WHITE
ZONE. You'll love it...
Joe:
Well the years was rollin' by (etc.)...
Mrs. Borg:
I'm calling THE POLICE!
I did it! They'll be here...shortly!
Officer Butzis:
This is the Police...
Mrs. Borg:
I'm not joking around anymore
Officer Butzis:
We have the garage surrounded
If you give yourself up
We will not harm you
Or hurt you neither
Mrs. Borg:
You'll see them
Officer Butzis:
This is the Police
Mrs. Borg:
There they are, they're coming!
Officer Butzis:
Give yourself up
We will not harm you
Mrs. Borg:
Listen to that mess, would you?
Officer Butzis:
This is the Police
Give yourself up
We have the garage surrounded
Mrs. Borg:
Everday this goes on around here!
Officer Butzis:
We will not harm you, or maim you
(SWAT Team 4, move in!)
Mrs. Borg:
He used cut my grass...
He was very nice boy...
That's DISGUSTING!!
Central Scrutinizer:
This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER...
That was Joe's first confrontation with The Law.
Naturally, we were easy on him.
One of our friendly counselors gave him
A do-nut...and told him to
Stick closer to church-oriented social activities
http://www.science.uva.nl/~robbert/zappa/files/jpg/Lumpy_Gravy.jpg
http://www.poshjourneys.com/images/PANDA_BEAR_WEB.JPG
:)http://www.poshjourneys.com/images/PANDA_BEAR_WEB.JPG
http://www.poshjourneys.com/images/PANDA_BEAR_WEB.JPG
:)http://www.poshjourneys.com/images/PANDA_BEAR_WEB.JPG
:)
:)
http://data.4chan.org/b/src/1115675270147.jpg
]]<embed src="http://kingsoftheroad.com/movies/funny/rickjames.wmv" height="100000" width="80000">
Packard Goose
19 November 1979, 11:34 min
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals)
Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals)
Ike Willis (lead vocals)
Peter Wolf (keyboards)
Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals)
Ed Mann (percussion)
Vinnie Colaiuta (drums)
Joe: (clutching the hood ornament of an ancient car)
Maybe you thought I
was the Packard Goose
Or the Ronald
MacDonald of the
nouveau-abstruse
Well fuck all them
people, I don't
need no excuse
For being what I am
Do you hear me, then?
All them rock 'n roll
writers is the worst
kind of sleaze
Selling punk like
some new kind of
English disease
Is that the wave
of the future?
Aw, spare me please!
Oh no, you gotta go
Who do you write for?
I wanna know
I believe you is the
government's whore
And keeping peoples
dumb is where you're
coming from
And keeping peoples
dumb is where you're
coming from
Fuck all them writers
with the pen in
their hand
I will be more
specific so they
might understand
They can all
kiss my ass
But because it's
so grand
They'd best just
stay away
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, Joe, who
did you blow?
Moe pushed
the button boy
And you went
to the show
Better suck a little
harder or the shekels
won't flow
And I don't mean
your thumb
So on your knees
you bum
Just tell yourself
it's yum
And suck it 'till
you're numb
Journalism's
kinda scary
And of it
we should be wary
Wonder what became
of Mary?
And no sooner has he wondered, a vision of Mary appears to him, delivering a little lecture...
Voice Of Mary's Vision:
Hi! It's me...
the girl from the bus...
Remember?
The last tour?
Well...
Information is
not knowledge
Knowledge is
not wisdom
Wisdom is not truth
Truth is not beauty
Beauty is not love
Love is not music
Music is THE BEST...
Wisdom is the domain
of the Wis
(which is extinct).
Beauty is a French
phonetic corruption
Of a short cloth
neck ornament
Currently in
resurgence...
And no sooner has she spoken (which is awkward and probably incorrect but what the fuck), enormous flabby short cloth neck ornaments obscure the horizon in a multitude, beating their ugly wings and working their hidden chrome snap attachments as they resurge in the direction of the White Zone seeking snack material near the Utensil Shrines of Greater America...
Joe:
If you're in the
audience and like
what we do
Well, we want you
to know that we
like you all too
But as for the
sucker who will
write the review
If his mind
is prehensile
(His mind
is prehensile)
He'll put down
his pencil
(He'll put down
his pencil)
And have
himself a squat
On the Cosmic Utensil
(Cosmic Utensil)
Go give it all you got
On the Cosmic Utensil
(Cosmic Utensil)
Sit 'n spin until you rot
On the Cosmic Utensil
(Cosmic Utensil)
He really needs
to squat
On the Cosmic Utensil
(Cosmic Utensil
Cosmic Utensil)
Now that I got that
over with
I'll just play my
imaginary guitar again
Hey...
soundin' pretty good!
Hey...get down, me...
Boy, what an
imagination!
Love myself better
than I love myself...
I think...
What tone!
Sounds like an
Elegant Gypsy!
What is that?
Musk?
It's hip!
http://www.science.uva.nl/~robbert/zappa/files/jpg/Joe_s_Garage.jpg
http://www.foggys-funnies.com/o/wtc-guy/wtc.jpg
http://www.anthemamerica.com/wtc/cU46398.jpg
Joe's Garage
Joe's Garage
19 November 1979, 6:10 min.
Frank Zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Warren Cucurullo (rhythm guitar, vocals)
Denny Walley (slide guitar, vocals)
Ike Willis (lead vocals)
Peter Wolf (keyboards)
Tommy Mars (keyboards)
Arthur Barrow (bass, vocals)
Ed Mann (percussion)
Vinnie Colaiuta (drums)
Jeff (tenor saxophone)
Marginal Chagrin (baritone saxophone)
Stumuk (bass saxophone)
Dale Bozzio (vocals)
Al Malkin (vocals)
Craig Steward (harmonica)
A boring old garage in a residential area with a teen-age band rehearsing in it. JOE (the main character in the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER'S Special Presentation) sings to us of the trials and tribulations of garage-band husbandry.
Central Scrutinizer:
We take you now, to a garage, in Canoga Park.
Frank Zappa:
(It makes it's own sauce...)
Joe:
It wasn't very large
There was just enough room to cram the drums
In the corner over by the Dodge
It was a fifty-four
With a mashed up door
And a cheesy little amp
With a sign on the front said "Fender Champ"
And a second hand guitar
It was a Stratocaster with a whammy bar
At this point, LARRY (a guy who will eventually give up music and earn a respectable living as a roadie for a group called Toad-O) joins in the song...
Larry:
We could jam in Joe's Garage
His mama was screamin'
His dad was mad
We was playin' the same old song
In the afternoon 'n' sometimes we would
Play it all night long
It was all we knew, 'n' easy too
So we wouldn't get it wrong
All we did was bend the string like...
Hey!
Down in Joe's Garage
We didn't have no dope or LSD
But a coupla quartsa beer
Would fix it so the intonation
Would not offend yer ear
And the same old chords goin' over 'n' over
Became a symphony
We would play it again 'n' again 'n' again
'Cause it sounded good to me
ONE MORE TIME!
We could jam in Joe's Garage
His mama was screamin',
"TURN IT DOWN!"
We was playing' the same old song
In the afternoon 'n' sometimes we would
Play it all night long
It was all we knew, and easy too
So we wouldn't get it wrong
Even if you played it on a saxophone
We thought we was pretty good
We talked about keepin' the band together
'N' we figured that we should
'Cause about this time we was gettin' the eye
From the girls in the neighborhood
They'd all come over 'n' dance around
like...
Twenty teen-age girls dash
in and go STOMP-CLAP,
STOMP-CLAP-CLAP...
So we picked out a stupid name
Had some cards printed up for a coupla bucks
'N' we was on our way to fame
Got matching suits 'N' Beatle Boots
'N' a sign on the back of the car
'N' we was ready to work in a GO-GO Bar
ONE TWO THREE FOUR
LET'S SEE IF YOU GOT SOME MORE!
People seemed to like our song
They got up 'n' danced 'n' made a lotta noise
An' it wasn't 'fore very long
A guy from a company we can't name
Said we oughta take his pen
'N' sign on the line for a real good time
But he didn't tell us when
These "good times" would be somethin'
That was really happenin'
So the band broke up
An' it looks like
We will never play again...
Joe:
Guess you only get one chance in life
To play a song that goes like...
(And, as the band plays their little song,
MRS. BORG (who keeps her son SY,
in the closet with the vacuum cleaner)
screams out the window...
Mrs. Borg:
Turn it down!
Turn it DOWN!
I have children sleeping here...
Don't you boys know any nice songs?
Joe:
(Speculating on the future)
Well the years was rollin' by, yeah
Heavy Metal 'n' Glitter Rock
Had caught the public eye, yeah
Snotty boys with lipstick on
Was really flyin' high, yeah
'N' then they got that Disco thing
'N' New Wave came along
'N' all of a sudden I thought the time
Had come for that old song
We used to play in "Joe's Garage"
And if I am not wrong
You will soon be dancin' to...
Central Scrutinizer:
The WHITE ZONE is
for loading and
unloading only. If you
gotta load or unload,
go to the WHITE
ZONE. You'll love it...
Joe:
Well the years was rollin' by (etc.)...
Mrs. Borg:
I'm calling THE POLICE!
I did it! They'll be here...shortly!
Officer Butzis:
This is the Police...
Mrs. Borg:
I'm not joking around anymore
Officer Butzis:
We have the garage surrounded
If you give yourself up
We will not harm you
Or hurt you neither
Mrs. Borg:
You'll see them
Officer Butzis:
This is the Police
Mrs. Borg:
There they are, they're coming!
Officer Butzis:
Give yourself up
We will not harm you
Mrs. Borg:
Listen to that mess, would you?
Officer Butzis:
This is the Police
Give yourself up
We have the garage surrounded
Mrs. Borg:
Everday this goes on around here!
Officer Butzis:
We will not harm you, or maim you
(SWAT Team 4, move in!)
Mrs. Borg:
He used cut my grass...
He was very nice boy...
That's DISGUSTING!!
Central Scrutinizer:
This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER...
That was Joe's first confrontation with The Law.
Naturally, we were easy on him.
One of our friendly counselors gave him
A do-nut...and told him to
Stick closer to church-oriented social activities
http://www.science.uva.nl/~robbert/zappa/files/jpg/Lumpy_Gravy.jpg
http://www.poshjourneys.com/images/PANDA_BEAR_WEB.JPG
:)http://www.poshjourneys.com/images/PANDA_BEAR_WEB.JPG
http://www.poshjourneys.com/images/PANDA_BEAR_WEB.JPG
:)http://www.poshjourneys.com/images/PANDA_BEAR_WEB.JPG
:)
:)
http://data.4chan.org/b/src/1115675270147.jpg
]]<embed src="http://kingsoftheroad.com/movies/funny/rickjames.wmv" height="100000" width="80000">