It's Tough Being a Republican

[Guitar Shark]

It is very tough to be a Republican in 2005 because,
somehow, you have to believe concurrently that:

1. Jesus loves you, but shares your deep hatred of
homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

2. "Standing Tall for America" means firing your
workers and moving their jobs to India.

3. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her
own body, but multi-national corporations can make
decisions affecting all humankind without regulation.

4. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime,
unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an
illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

5. The best way to improve military morale is to
praise the troops in speeches, while slashing
veterans' benefits and combat pay.

6. Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins, unless
you someday run for governor of California as a
Republican.

7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents
won't have sex.

8. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our
long-time allies, but then demand their cooperation
and money.

9. HMOs and insurance companies make profits and have
the interest of the public at heart.

10. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound
policy. Providing health care to all Americans is
socialism.

11. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are
junk science, but creationism should be taught in
schools.

12. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him and
Rumsfeld reassured him he was our buddy, a bad guy
when Bush Sr. made war on him, a good guy when
Cheney did business with him, but then a bad guy again
when Bush Jr. needed a prop for his re-election
campaign as the "war President".

13. A President lying about an extramarital affair is
an impeachable offense. A president lying about WMD
existence, to enlist support for an unprovoked,
undeclared war and occupation, in which thousands of
soldiers and civilians die, is somehow solid "defense"
policy in a "War against Terrorism".

14. Government should limit itself to the powers named
in the Constitution, which should include "banning gay
marriages and censoring the Internet".

15. The public has a right to know about Hillary's
cattle trades, but George Bush's Harken Oil stock
trade should be sealed in his Daddy's library, and is
none of our business.

16. The United States should get out of the United
Nations, but our highest national priority is
enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

17. What Bill Clinton or John Kerry did in the 1960s
was of vital national interest but what Bush did in
the '80s is irrelevant.

18. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is
communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital
to a "spirit of international harmony".

19. You are a conservative, but it is OK to spend like
there is no tomorrow and run up deficits that your
grandchildren will have to pay, while at the same time
refunding as much tax money as possible to rich people
who do not need it.

[Warham]

lol, funny stuff, but I personally disagree with many of them on so many levels.

[Guitar Shark]

There may be hope for you yet, War... :D

[Warham]

We all like to compartmentalize (is that a word?) everybody else here for fun, but it's not a good indication of reality.

;)

[ODShowtime]

I enjoyed it thoroughly. This is the shit that's making me crazy.

So much irony and hypocrisy.

[BigBadBrian]

Originally posted by ODShowtime
I enjoyed it thoroughly. This is the shit that's making me crazy.

So much irony and hypocrisy.

That's because you are a simpleton, OD. You probably still enjoy playing with the empty boxes on Christmas morning while the kids enjoy their toys.

:gulp:

[LoungeMachine]

GREAT READ, COUNSELOR

The TRUTH really hurts them when bullet-pointed so clearly.


I'd love for Warham to give a few numbers of the ones he's so troubled with....

Just the top 2-3 would suffice.

Thanks Sharkey.

[mwsully]

Hallelujah, Guitar Shark. You've summed it up for me.

[NATEDOG001976]

I really can't stand the Ultra Liberals, and the hard core Republicans. They both suck!

[ODShowtime]

Originally posted by BigBadBrian
That's because you are a simpleton, OD. You probably still enjoy playing with the empty boxes on Christmas morning while the kids enjoy their toys.

:gulp:

That was a really lame put-down. :rolleyes:

Care to refute any of the bullets above?

[LoungeMachine]

Originally posted by NATEDOG001976
I really can't stand the Ultra Liberals, and the hard core Republicans. They both suck!

You really should practice a bit before coming into The FRONTLINE.

If that's your A-game, you're in Wayne L. territory :rolleyes:


However, FAUX News may be hiring :D

[diamondD]

I thought chain emails weren't allowed?

Oh yeah, wrong side. My bad...

[BigBadBrian]

Originally posted by diamondD
I thought chain emails weren't allowed?

Oh yeah, wrong side. My bad...

That's only for the "neo-cons" :rolleyes:

Go ahead and post the next e-mail you get.

I have so many Howard Dean photos that FORD will be closing threads for DAYS if he closes yours.

:gulp:

[LoungeMachine]

Originally posted by diamondD
I thought chain emails weren't allowed?

Oh yeah, wrong side. My bad...

You know, Sharkey has over 2k in posts, but has only started 24 threads.

That's a pretty low ratio for us FRONTLINERS, and NO ONE can paint him with the spam/button pusher brush :cool:


Talking about spamming emails and DEAN threads in some sort of "retaliation" for this thread is stoopid.

Sharkey's thread is funny. JUST as a fucking bullet point call out of us "Liberal wackos" would have you guys chortling the night away.

Funny how I've noticed not ONE rebuttal of a single bullet point, though.

Admit it, or don't. But most of these are pretty dead-on

:cool:

[LoungeMachine]

Originally posted by BigBadBrian
That's only for the "neo-cons" :rolleyes:

Go ahead and post the next e-mail you get.

I have so many Howard Dean photos that FORD will be closing threads for DAYS if he closes yours.

:gulp:

:rolleyes:

Yeah, and then let's put a bag of burning dog shit on his porch and ring the bell .........


Got King Oscar in The can?

[scamper]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Guitar Shark


2. "Standing Tall for America" means firing your
workers and moving their jobs to India.

This is neither a rep or dem thing, its an American thing. If you are willing to earn less to produce or pay more for goods the problem will solve itself until then forget about it.


7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents
won't have sex.

Condoms should be kept out of schools, thats a family matter. If you got a good relationship with your children this can be handled at home


10. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound
policy. Providing health care to all Americans is
socialism.

It is socialism. no thanks


11. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are
junk science, but creationism should be taught in
schools.

Keep all religion out of school....all of them.




I'm not a republican but I agree with some of their ideas, though it's truly doubtful that anyone agrees with all of the things listed in this thread.

[ELVIS]

Originally posted by scamper

7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents
won't have sex.

Condoms should be kept out of schools, thats a family matter. If you got a good relationship with your children this can be handled at home



Yeah right, on both counts...:rolleyes:

[kentuckyklira]

Originally posted by ODShowtime
That was a really lame put-down. :rolleyes:

Care to refute any of the bullets above? BigBlubberButt couldn´t refute a wrong bill at a Pizza Hut!

[FORD]

Originally posted by diamondD
I thought chain emails weren't allowed?

Oh yeah, wrong side. My bad...

Would Matt do something like that? ;)

[Guitar Shark]

Originally posted by diamondD
I thought chain emails weren't allowed?

Oh yeah, wrong side. My bad...

Post some of your own buddy. I'm sure you can find a few. ;)

[FORD]

Originally posted by Guitar Shark
Post some of your own buddy. I'm sure you can find a few. ;)

Warpig beat him to it.

[Nickdfresh]

This is topically relevant. I'm not against "chain e-mails" in themselves, but when I have to read about the Kennedy/ Chapaquitic crap with no discernable current events relevance over and over, well, stuff it!

[LoungeMachine]

Originally posted by LoungeMachine
You know, Sharkey has over 2k in posts, but has only started 24 threads.

That's a pretty low ratio for us FRONTLINERS, and NO ONE can paint him with the spam/button pusher brush :cool:


Talking about spamming emails and DEAN threads in some sort of "retaliation" for this thread is stoopid.

Sharkey's thread is funny. JUST as a fucking bullet point call out of us "Liberal wackos" would have you guys chortling the night away.

Funny how I've noticed not ONE rebuttal of a single bullet point, though.

Admit it, or don't. But most of these are pretty dead-on

:cool:


Still no rebuttals:confused:

Must deep down agree with the points ;)

[Wayne L.]

I worship Howard Dean's sweaty Reeboks.

[ODShowtime]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Guitar Shark


2. "Standing Tall for America" means firing your
workers and moving their jobs to India.


Originally posted by scamper
This is neither a rep or dem thing, its an American thing. If you are willing to earn less to produce or pay more for goods the problem will solve itself until then forget about it.

good point


7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents
won't have sex.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by scamper
Condoms should be kept out of schools, thats a family matter. If you got a good relationship with your children this can be handled at home

False. It's the poorer kids from fucked up homes that need the condoms the most! Don't turn a blind eye to reality just to make yourself feel better.


11. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are
junk science, but creationism should be taught in
schools.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by scamper
Keep all religion out of school....all of them.

another good point.

That was good. You're the only person who gave it a shot.

[Wayne L.]

Whoever the SCUMBAG is twisting my words around on this site doesn't have enough balls to meet me in public & is gay.

[Nickdfresh]

WAYNE, fuck off. You're too dumb for this forum! Go somewhere else feet-boy.

[Wayne L.]

YOU are too dumb to live Nick.

[Nickdfresh]

Originally posted by Wayne L.
YOU are too dumb to live Nick.

No WAYNE you are too stupid to be here stay in the trailer with mom and how is that career as a lyricist going?

http://is3.okcupid.com/users/142/508/14250954619882986088/mt1115659603.jpg

Wayne's lesbian porn....

[Dr. Love]

Originally posted by Guitar Shark
It is very tough to be a Republican in 2005 because,
somehow, you have to believe concurrently that:

1. Jesus loves you, but shares your deep hatred of
homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

2. "Standing Tall for America" means firing your
workers and moving their jobs to India.

3. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her
own body, but multi-national corporations can make
decisions affecting all humankind without regulation.

4. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime,
unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an
illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

5. The best way to improve military morale is to
praise the troops in speeches, while slashing
veterans' benefits and combat pay.

6. Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins, unless
you someday run for governor of California as a
Republican.

7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents
won't have sex.

8. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our
long-time allies, but then demand their cooperation
and money.

9. HMOs and insurance companies make profits and have
the interest of the public at heart.

10. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound
policy. Providing health care to all Americans is
socialism.

11. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are
junk science, but creationism should be taught in
schools.

12. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him and
Rumsfeld reassured him he was our buddy, a bad guy
when Bush Sr. made war on him, a good guy when
Cheney did business with him, but then a bad guy again
when Bush Jr. needed a prop for his re-election
campaign as the "war President".

13. A President lying about an extramarital affair is
an impeachable offense. A president lying about WMD
existence, to enlist support for an unprovoked,
undeclared war and occupation, in which thousands of
soldiers and civilians die, is somehow solid "defense"
policy in a "War against Terrorism".

14. Government should limit itself to the powers named
in the Constitution, which should include "banning gay
marriages and censoring the Internet".

15. The public has a right to know about Hillary's
cattle trades, but George Bush's Harken Oil stock
trade should be sealed in his Daddy's library, and is
none of our business.

16. The United States should get out of the United
Nations, but our highest national priority is
enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

17. What Bill Clinton or John Kerry did in the 1960s
was of vital national interest but what Bush did in
the '80s is irrelevant.

18. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is
communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital
to a "spirit of international harmony".

19. You are a conservative, but it is OK to spend like
there is no tomorrow and run up deficits that your
grandchildren will have to pay, while at the same time
refunding as much tax money as possible to rich people
who do not need it.

GS, I'm going to have to give you -1 Karma for trolling the liberals here.

I don't have to tell you what happens when you reach -5.

;)

[Cathedral]

Originally posted by Guitar Shark
It is very tough to be a Republican in 2005 because,
somehow, you have to believe concurrently that:

1. Jesus loves you, but shares your deep hatred of
homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

(WRONG! Jesus isn't about hatred, and those who gave you that impression aren't Christians at all, so to generalize like this is off base)

2. "Standing Tall for America" means firing your
workers and moving their jobs to India.

(Um, Fair Trade isn't a Republican thing. remember it was Bill Clinton who put NAFTA in place...this is a shared blame area here)

3. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her
own body, but multi-national corporations can make
decisions affecting all humankind without regulation.

(Sure she can, most just choose NOT to be responsible before they get pregnant, which is nothing but selfish on their part)

4. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime,
unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an
illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

(Bullshit, if he breaks the law nothing else matters to me but justice.)

5. The best way to improve military morale is to
praise the troops in speeches, while slashing
veterans' benefits and combat pay.

(How long has it been since vietnem? and how much change did any Democrat President make on this issue? Sorry, but this is another example of shared blame.)

6. Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins, unless
you someday run for governor of California as a
Republican.

(A stab at Arnie, cool, but he's no republican, try Republocrat)

7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents
won't have sex.

(I don't get this point. Condoms are readily available damn near anywhere so the problem isn't the condoms, it's that kids just don't use them...this point is moot.)

8. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our
long-time allies, but then demand their cooperation
and money.

(Most of them are in bed with our enemies, so they deserve to be belittled and charged for past services rendered. funny thing is, they'll be wanting our help again in the future anyway, for something)

9. HMOs and insurance companies make profits and have
the interest of the public at heart.

(Nobody has anyone's interest at heart but there own on any issue, this point is also moot.)

10. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound
policy. Providing health care to all Americans is
socialism.

(It is socialism, and i've explained the facts on this in another thread. believe me, you don't want a Universal Health Plan in this country, and once you get that it will be too late. you think the quality of care sucks now? Just wait, and be very careful what you wish for)

11. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are
junk science, but creationism should be taught in
schools.

(All points of view should be taught in school if any view is taught at all. we call that a well rounded education here in red Ohio)

12. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him and
Rumsfeld reassured him he was our buddy, a bad guy
when Bush Sr. made war on him, a good guy when
Cheney did business with him, but then a bad guy again
when Bush Jr. needed a prop for his re-election
campaign as the "war President".

(Jeeze, and saddam didn't do anything to fall from grace? (not that he ever should have been there to begin with) like trying to take over Kuwait?
Naw, we should have just let him go, right?)

13. A President lying about an extramarital affair is
an impeachable offense. A president lying about WMD
existence, to enlist support for an unprovoked,
undeclared war and occupation, in which thousands of
soldiers and civilians die, is somehow solid "defense"
policy in a "War against Terrorism".

(Um, WMD existance wasn't a lie, everyone knows he had plenty of it at one time. intell just failed to point out that it had expired and was not replenished, apparently. And the war wasn't unprovoked if you look at this little documant called a cease-fire agreement, one that ended Desert Storm....Saddam failed to meet the conditions on several levels, so there is justification for his removal beyond the tired old talking points.)

14. Government should limit itself to the powers named
in the Constitution, which should include "banning gay
marriages and censoring the Internet".

(Hmmmm, a catch 22 because i'm against gay marriage and against censorship, so i'll meet this one half way)

15. The public has a right to know about Hillary's
cattle trades, but George Bush's Harken Oil stock
trade should be sealed in his Daddy's library, and is
none of our business.

(If they are relevent to his job, they are our business.)

16. The United States should get out of the United
Nations, but our highest national priority is
enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

(This makes no sense, it's because of Iraq and the kickbacks and a failed OFF agreement that lined many of our backstabbers, er a, i mean allie's pockets that this has even become an issue. I do agree though, the U.N. is a non-functioning entity at this stage of the game)

17. What Bill Clinton or John Kerry did in the 1960s
was of vital national interest but what Bush did in
the '80s is irrelevant.

(Bullshit, it's all relevant, this point is moot)

18. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is
communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital
to a "spirit of international harmony".

(I don't believe in doing business at all with a communist country, since most of our modern history was about being hell bent to fight against it. the fact that we support communist economies doesn't sit well with me, but i don't see Democrats doing anything different, in fact as i already stated, NAFTA was implemented by Bill Clinton, that ==equals shared blame in my opinion.)

19. You are a conservative, but it is OK to spend like
there is no tomorrow and run up deficits that your
grandchildren will have to pay, while at the same time
refunding as much tax money as possible to rich people
who do not need it.

(I'm not rich, and i got a refund so i never understood this argument. but i'm also very concerned about the spending because it isn't representative of what my view as a Conservative is at all. I want spending to be capped ASAP because i see some very bad things on the horizon as indicated by recent market trends. We are in for a very bad time real soon...And Bush won't be lucky enough to leave office before the storm hits either....we're talking a matter of a few months and our economy is going to nose dive, mark my words and this date, i shit you not)

[Cathedral]

Bottom Line: All Politicians SUCK, from as far left to as far right as you can go. It's all based on corruption, lies, and deceit with nobodies best interests in mind but the wealthy.
These problems aren't just limited to one party or the other, they all suck equally when it comes to doing what they are/were elected to do, represent the people.

[Pink Spider]

Originally posted by Cathedral
Bottom Line: All Politicians SUCK, from as far left to as far right as you can go. It's all based on corruption, lies, and deceit with nobodies best interests in mind but the wealthy.
These problems aren't just limited to one party or the other, they all suck equally when it comes to doing what they are/were elected to do, represent the people.

I agree, mostly.

I would though, settle for just leaving people the hell alone over a tyranny of the majority.

Politicians, etc, are mostly power hungry maniacs intent telling people how to live their lives. Maybe not so much focused on the wealthy. Capitalism is preferable to the other one.
I believe it is more like themselves and their party that they're focused on. Other people's lives are a game to them. Whichever team gains more power over people first, wins. Like sports, only more moronic.

Independent politicians, that think there should be freedom for everyone are an endangered species.

[4moreyears]

Originally posted by Guitar Shark
Post some of your own buddy. I'm sure you can find a few. ;)

I have and that Dick Ford closes the thread.

[LoungeMachine]

What's a Dick Ford ?

[4moreyears]

Originally posted by LoungeMachine
What's a Dick Ford ?

it's that thing you put in your mouth every night.

[Nickdfresh]

A gay obsession?

[FORD]

**Shameless Election Day Necropost** :biggrin:

[Kristy]

I don't get the Rethuglican agenda anymore. They used to run on the principles of whacked occultism Christian morals and pseudo-patriotism. Now it's rosy-glassed retrostalgia of when "America was a better place and we can return there" hyperbole nonsense complied with anti-abortion machismo and gun rights for all. But let's see here...Obama has been in Office for over 2 years and I still have my 9mm. As for what I can or can't do with my body based upon Rethuglican pundits who are the most uniformed self-advocates for the unborn that remains to be seen.

[Nitro Express]

I don't get the Rethuglican agenda anymore. They used to run on the principles of whacked occultism Christian morals and pseudo-patriotism. Now it's rosy-glassed retrostalgia of when "America was a better place and we can return there" hyperbole nonsense complied with anti-abortion machismo and gun rights for all. But let's see here...Obama has been in Office for over 2 years and I still have my 9mm. As for what I can or can't do with my body based upon Rethuglican pundits who are the most uniformed self-advocates for the unborn that remains to be seen.

I would love to see a pro-gun, pro-choice, marry who you want, fiscally conservative party. I can dream can't I?

[FORD]

I would love to see a pro-gun, pro-choice, marry who you want, fiscally conservative party. I can dream can't I?

Sounds like the Log Cabin Republicans (http://online.logcabin.org/) :biggrin:

[Nitro Express]

I really can't stand the Ultra Liberals, and the hard core Republicans. They both suck!
So true Natedog. Both want to do all the thinking for you.

[Nitro Express]

Sounds like the Log Cabin Republicans (http://online.logcabin.org/) :biggrin:

I live in a log home so there! :biggrin:

[Nitro Express]

I think you deserve the right to own a gun to protect your gay spouse and adopted Haitian baby from harm.

[Nickdfresh]

I would love to see a pro-gun, pro-choice, marry who you want, fiscally conservative party. I can dream can't I?

They're called "Libertarians" actually...

[FORD]

Libertarians aren't fiscally conservative, they're more like fiscally insane.

[Seshmeister]

Their policies on education make them unelectable.

[Seshmeister]

I would love to see a pro-gun, pro-choice, marry who you want, fiscally conservative party. I can dream can't I?

That can't happen because the conservative party need to use bigotry against homo's to get their vote out.

These days politicians don't have a whole lot of power so all they can do is work at the edge on the dumb pointless shit that appeals to the facist Christians.

Without this pointless crap Bush would never have got re-elected.

Ridiculous and kind of offensive considering the wars.

[ashstralia]

the thinning of the hippies is a b.c.e. conspiracy.

[Seshmeister]

I always thought that was due to the lentils.

[ELVIS]

http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/44227000/jpg/_44227545_nigel_bbcpicgall.jpg


:elvis:

[FORD]

Elvis is a fan of The Young Ones? Who would have guessed that.

[Nickdfresh]

Their policies on education make them unelectable.

Yes, but not limited to that. Actually, most libertarians are completely rife with internal contradictions (like "Libertarians" that are against abortion rights). But I think that can be said of self-described conservatives in general...

[ELVIS]

Elvis is a fan of The Young Ones? Who would have guessed that.

Like that's a stretch ??