Matt White
12-29-2005, 06:57 PM
By BECKY TODD
BOCA RATON, Fla. -- How dumb do companies think we are? From the looks of the warning labels they slap on their products, they must believe we're complete morons!
Here, we've collected some of the most ridiculous advice from smartypants manufacturers:
•Sleeping Pills -- Caution: May make you drowsy.
•Lighters -- Contents flammable.
•Dog Shampoo -- The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.
•Shampoo -- Intended for use on hair only -- not eyes.
•Stroller -- Remove infant before folding for storage.
•Curling Iron -- Not for internal use.
•Microwave Oven -- Do not use for drying pets.
•Child's Playhouse -- This is not a toy.
•Toilet Bowl Cleaning Brush -- Do not use orally.
•King Size Mattress -- Warning: Do not attempt to swallow.
•Can of Insecticide -- This spray is harmful to insects.
•Firecrackers -- Do not light while holding in mouth.
•Fat-Free Potato Chips -- May cause anal leakage.
•Peanut Butter -- Warning: May contain nuts.
•TV Dinner -- Remove plastic wrap cover before eating.
•Batteries -- Do not swallow. C or D batteries may cause choking.
•.22-Caliber Rifle -- May cause injury or death.
•Hardware Store Rotary Drill -- This product not intended for dental purposes.
•Hemorrhoid Suppositories -- Remove aluminum wrapping before insertion.
•Disposable Diapers -- Dispose of after use.
•Electric Cattle Prod -- For use on animals only.
BOCA RATON, Fla. -- How dumb do companies think we are? From the looks of the warning labels they slap on their products, they must believe we're complete morons!
Here, we've collected some of the most ridiculous advice from smartypants manufacturers:
•Sleeping Pills -- Caution: May make you drowsy.
•Lighters -- Contents flammable.
•Dog Shampoo -- The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.
•Shampoo -- Intended for use on hair only -- not eyes.
•Stroller -- Remove infant before folding for storage.
•Curling Iron -- Not for internal use.
•Microwave Oven -- Do not use for drying pets.
•Child's Playhouse -- This is not a toy.
•Toilet Bowl Cleaning Brush -- Do not use orally.
•King Size Mattress -- Warning: Do not attempt to swallow.
•Can of Insecticide -- This spray is harmful to insects.
•Firecrackers -- Do not light while holding in mouth.
•Fat-Free Potato Chips -- May cause anal leakage.
•Peanut Butter -- Warning: May contain nuts.
•TV Dinner -- Remove plastic wrap cover before eating.
•Batteries -- Do not swallow. C or D batteries may cause choking.
•.22-Caliber Rifle -- May cause injury or death.
•Hardware Store Rotary Drill -- This product not intended for dental purposes.
•Hemorrhoid Suppositories -- Remove aluminum wrapping before insertion.
•Disposable Diapers -- Dispose of after use.
•Electric Cattle Prod -- For use on animals only.