Ozzy Fudd
07-16-2006, 07:37 PM
Whelp to my friends this was funny,
My middle son and youngest wanted separate vacations, ok says mom and dad what would you like to do she says to the youngest..... I want to go to the 6 flags resort and take (SusieQ's son who is a little older than him) on the trip. sounds like a plan says mom. and what do you want to do...campin with Dad he said.With out even thinking twice i said sure one on one time is needed here cuz we always Butt heads. so mom drops us off at the State Camping Ground with all our gear and the two BB guns. we set up camp nice cool evening set up targets ...Soda cans we drank some foam cups and plates we took fishing line and hung cans from trees about 10 feet up...those are the Snipers dad he says, and we go sit in our chairs and start firing away ping ....ping ...zzzzzzzzzzzzip we shot till the dark. next day rain...Rain and more RAIN. we decide hey the US Army fights in the rain so out the tent we go shootin up our targets .now this was a heavy thunder storm watch and all the Warnings we did not care, "Dammit were winning the WAR." we had two cans cut in half from the trees. all kind of shit killed and a bag of KIA's ( cups and cans ) next to my chair. then it happened Hey there Fellas..... we hear. What ya got there. Why Red Ryder's My son beams, and look we cut those two cans right in half. whhelll that's some real good shootin but your breaking the LAW. and you have to leave the camp ground right now and i need to take those WEAPONS.(says the young newbie) Ok my turn, What WEAPONS, hey wait these shoot just over 200 FPS i said. just a little faster than a spitball, and were stuck here until Sunday my wife dropped us off and will return from her journey about 11:00 am. and i smiled. (no response) call it in he says to his partner. (Yup i just gotta add some more) i had no clue these were against the law and i call him by his first name (no Response) the captain answered back how old are the KIDS with the guns (whelp i gotta yell out ) tell him one of them is 50 and the other is 13. (now i get a chuckle out of the older guy) captain replies where's the 15 year olds parents. i yell over... tell him i'm the parent and i'm 50. the older guy chuckles and shakes his head. Alright bring the PARRENT to me. so the young rookie takes the truck and DEADLY RED RYDER BB GUNS, leaving the old guy and me to walk in the Rain 1/4 mile up to the base. when we get there.... NOW in my best Forrest Gump impression i said to the Capitan...Stupid is as stupid does. he laughs quick and says, now look i don't want to embarrass you in front of your son but i under stand your situation with not being able to leave. i will not phone in the incident to the State Police. (right now my head is spinnin outta control with Laughter) Cap i said where is your R's-and-R's so i can let my son know what is going on. he looks stumped for a second. ah Rules and Regulations are posted as you come in.. right there. he makes me sign a receipt of property taken from seine. ( right now i'm like WTF is this a CSI episode) now i need to explain that you have to think about the Woodland creatures out there you may have shot or put in harms way or you could hurt yourself or others.(ok Fuck me i'm 12 years old right now look on my face stares back at him) Cap we noticed when we came in that there were no Animals anywhere within 25 feet from where we were set up and we were shooting into the deep part of the woods where it was safe.( ya know what DON'T tell ENCON you are almost as smart as them.) cus they just get pissed. ok i'm helping ya here he says i could have you removed. (ozz nows Cuts his shit) shuts up and looks like he is rrrrrrrrrrreally listening(makes Cap really happy.) then says to me please be out early as possible sunday and come to the base to pick up your guns.ok i said and went back to my son at the camp site. Soaked to the bones we LOAO my son says to me. Dad? how the hell are gonna protect ourselves from a crazed chipmunk on a suside mission wanting our peanut butter. christ sakes do we live in America, fuck that Osama dude man he says he ruined our lives here. smart 13 year old. i still am in shock over this stupid bb shit. so i call my wife at 10:00 pm saturday night and told her the story and to pick us up at 7:00 am sunday. when i banged on the door there was a half asleep cap lookin surprised at what time i showed at the door . i go you said ( in my best forrest gump Voice ) LEAVE EARLY. lol
Ahhhh what fun huh?
My middle son and youngest wanted separate vacations, ok says mom and dad what would you like to do she says to the youngest..... I want to go to the 6 flags resort and take (SusieQ's son who is a little older than him) on the trip. sounds like a plan says mom. and what do you want to do...campin with Dad he said.With out even thinking twice i said sure one on one time is needed here cuz we always Butt heads. so mom drops us off at the State Camping Ground with all our gear and the two BB guns. we set up camp nice cool evening set up targets ...Soda cans we drank some foam cups and plates we took fishing line and hung cans from trees about 10 feet up...those are the Snipers dad he says, and we go sit in our chairs and start firing away ping ....ping ...zzzzzzzzzzzzip we shot till the dark. next day rain...Rain and more RAIN. we decide hey the US Army fights in the rain so out the tent we go shootin up our targets .now this was a heavy thunder storm watch and all the Warnings we did not care, "Dammit were winning the WAR." we had two cans cut in half from the trees. all kind of shit killed and a bag of KIA's ( cups and cans ) next to my chair. then it happened Hey there Fellas..... we hear. What ya got there. Why Red Ryder's My son beams, and look we cut those two cans right in half. whhelll that's some real good shootin but your breaking the LAW. and you have to leave the camp ground right now and i need to take those WEAPONS.(says the young newbie) Ok my turn, What WEAPONS, hey wait these shoot just over 200 FPS i said. just a little faster than a spitball, and were stuck here until Sunday my wife dropped us off and will return from her journey about 11:00 am. and i smiled. (no response) call it in he says to his partner. (Yup i just gotta add some more) i had no clue these were against the law and i call him by his first name (no Response) the captain answered back how old are the KIDS with the guns (whelp i gotta yell out ) tell him one of them is 50 and the other is 13. (now i get a chuckle out of the older guy) captain replies where's the 15 year olds parents. i yell over... tell him i'm the parent and i'm 50. the older guy chuckles and shakes his head. Alright bring the PARRENT to me. so the young rookie takes the truck and DEADLY RED RYDER BB GUNS, leaving the old guy and me to walk in the Rain 1/4 mile up to the base. when we get there.... NOW in my best Forrest Gump impression i said to the Capitan...Stupid is as stupid does. he laughs quick and says, now look i don't want to embarrass you in front of your son but i under stand your situation with not being able to leave. i will not phone in the incident to the State Police. (right now my head is spinnin outta control with Laughter) Cap i said where is your R's-and-R's so i can let my son know what is going on. he looks stumped for a second. ah Rules and Regulations are posted as you come in.. right there. he makes me sign a receipt of property taken from seine. ( right now i'm like WTF is this a CSI episode) now i need to explain that you have to think about the Woodland creatures out there you may have shot or put in harms way or you could hurt yourself or others.(ok Fuck me i'm 12 years old right now look on my face stares back at him) Cap we noticed when we came in that there were no Animals anywhere within 25 feet from where we were set up and we were shooting into the deep part of the woods where it was safe.( ya know what DON'T tell ENCON you are almost as smart as them.) cus they just get pissed. ok i'm helping ya here he says i could have you removed. (ozz nows Cuts his shit) shuts up and looks like he is rrrrrrrrrrreally listening(makes Cap really happy.) then says to me please be out early as possible sunday and come to the base to pick up your guns.ok i said and went back to my son at the camp site. Soaked to the bones we LOAO my son says to me. Dad? how the hell are gonna protect ourselves from a crazed chipmunk on a suside mission wanting our peanut butter. christ sakes do we live in America, fuck that Osama dude man he says he ruined our lives here. smart 13 year old. i still am in shock over this stupid bb shit. so i call my wife at 10:00 pm saturday night and told her the story and to pick us up at 7:00 am sunday. when i banged on the door there was a half asleep cap lookin surprised at what time i showed at the door . i go you said ( in my best forrest gump Voice ) LEAVE EARLY. lol
Ahhhh what fun huh?