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SoCalChelle
09-25-2006, 02:11 PM
New England Temperature Conversion Chart



60° F: Southern Californians shiver uncontrollably. People in New England sunbathe.



50° F: New Yorkers try to turn on the heat. People in New England plant gardens.



40° F: Italian and English cars won't start. People in New England drive with the windows down.



32° F: Distilled water freezes. Maine's Moosehead Lake's water gets thicker.



20° F: Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats. People in New England throw on a flannel shirt.



15° F: New York landlords finally turn up the heat. People in New England have the last cookout before it gets cold.



0° F: All the people in Miami die... New Englanders close the windows.



10° below zero: Californians fly away to Mexico. The Girl Scouts in New England are selling cookies door to door.



25° below zero: Hollywood disintegrates. People in New England get out their winter coats.



40° below zero: Washington DC runs out of hot air. People in New England let the dogs sleep indoors.



100° below zero: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. New Englanders get frustrated because they can't start their "kahs".



460° below zero: All atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale). People in New England start saying..."Cold 'nuff for ya?"



500° below zero: Hell freezes over. The Red Sox win the World Series



- author unknown

Don Corleone
09-26-2006, 03:50 PM
Clearly you've never been to the North of England.

diamondsgirl
09-28-2006, 05:29 PM
Thats pretty funny. :D

(I live in MA)

Here's some other funny shit like that:

Forget Rednecks, here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about
New Englanders...

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you
live in New England.

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't
work there, you live in New England.

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you live in New
England.

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed
a wrong number, you live in New England.

If "Vacation" means going anywhere south of New York City for the
weekend, you live in New England.

If you measure distance in hours, you live in New England.

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you live
in New England.

If you have switched from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back
again, you live in New England.

If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard
without flinching, you live in New England.

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both
unlocked, you live in New England.

If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them,
you live in New England.

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you
live in New England.

If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph -- you're going 80 and
everybody is passing you, you live in New England.

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with
snow, you live in New England.

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road
construction, you live in New England.

If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you live in
New England.

If you find 10 degrees "a little chilly", you live in New England.