Hardrock69
10-11-2006, 02:33 PM
In response to the MLB Players Union's recent proposal to expand the current playoff system to include more wildcard teams and give byes to teams with the best records, team owners have countered with their own "Thunderdome" plan.
Instead of the traditional best-of-seven series, the proposed "two teams enter, one team leaves" format would pit the entire rosters of both teams in an all-out battle royale. Players would be suspended from bungee cords and forced to duel with spears, polearms, war hammers, and a variety of other low-tech melee weapons. The last
MLB Commissioner Bud Selig (left) and assistant Sandy Alderson (right) support the owners' proposal
team with surviving players would be declared the winner and advance to the next round.
MLB Commissioner Bud Selig (left) and assistant Sandy Alderson (right) support the owners' proposal
http://www.spitter.com/images/masterblaster.jpg
The plan has the support of MLB commissioner/methane engineer Bud Selig. However, the Players Union has voiced some resistance to the proposal.
"While the owners' plan does make early-round byes extremely important, we feel the proposal is simply an excuse for the owners to request more public funding to build new stadiums," said Players Union chief Don Fehr. "And Bud Selig continues to favor the owners' interests over those of the players and the fans. Why, he's nothing but a Raggedy Man!"
"Yumpin' Yoisus, him sad. Brain broken," responded Selig moments before instituting an embargo. "Who run MLB? Say louder!"
Despite the players' objections, MLB owners insist the proposal will vastly improve the game.
"This is a win-win situation for us," said Reds owner Carl Lindner. "Not only does it raise revenue, but the wholesale slaughter of the game's best players during the playoffs pretty much guarantees that small-market teams will eventually get a shot at the championship. Plus it will help us get out from under some of those pesky long-term contracts and deferred salaries."
When asked if the violent nature of Thunderdome would create problems in the stands, Astros owner Drayton McLane replied, "Most games in Chicago are already this violent, so what have we got to lose?"
Chicago fans were busy conducting raids on oil refineries in the Australian outback and were unavailable for comment
http://www.spitter.com/spitter_thunderdome.htm
Instead of the traditional best-of-seven series, the proposed "two teams enter, one team leaves" format would pit the entire rosters of both teams in an all-out battle royale. Players would be suspended from bungee cords and forced to duel with spears, polearms, war hammers, and a variety of other low-tech melee weapons. The last
MLB Commissioner Bud Selig (left) and assistant Sandy Alderson (right) support the owners' proposal
team with surviving players would be declared the winner and advance to the next round.
MLB Commissioner Bud Selig (left) and assistant Sandy Alderson (right) support the owners' proposal
http://www.spitter.com/images/masterblaster.jpg
The plan has the support of MLB commissioner/methane engineer Bud Selig. However, the Players Union has voiced some resistance to the proposal.
"While the owners' plan does make early-round byes extremely important, we feel the proposal is simply an excuse for the owners to request more public funding to build new stadiums," said Players Union chief Don Fehr. "And Bud Selig continues to favor the owners' interests over those of the players and the fans. Why, he's nothing but a Raggedy Man!"
"Yumpin' Yoisus, him sad. Brain broken," responded Selig moments before instituting an embargo. "Who run MLB? Say louder!"
Despite the players' objections, MLB owners insist the proposal will vastly improve the game.
"This is a win-win situation for us," said Reds owner Carl Lindner. "Not only does it raise revenue, but the wholesale slaughter of the game's best players during the playoffs pretty much guarantees that small-market teams will eventually get a shot at the championship. Plus it will help us get out from under some of those pesky long-term contracts and deferred salaries."
When asked if the violent nature of Thunderdome would create problems in the stands, Astros owner Drayton McLane replied, "Most games in Chicago are already this violent, so what have we got to lose?"
Chicago fans were busy conducting raids on oil refineries in the Australian outback and were unavailable for comment
http://www.spitter.com/spitter_thunderdome.htm