Craigslist ad I came across

[Little Texan]

I was just going through the computer section of the Houston Craigslist when this ad caught my attention. Some people have alot of nerve. You've probably heard the old expression "Beggars can't be choosers", well, apparently this asshole hasn't. Unfuckingbelievable.

Link (http://houston.craigslist.org/sys/1367065142.html)

Hello im not like most i have worked hard my whole life sense i was 16 i had a job with my dad working in the heat well im 22 now and was married till she left me and destoryed my 2000$ computer. So im looking for a hand out sadly i lost my job recently still trying to find something but it's hard when your car get's taking by some bitch. anyway im posting this from a friends house. I'm looking for a free Gaming Computer that will at best play world of warcraft with no laging i need the whole set up from mouse & keyboard to monitor and of course the tower. I know the world does not like when people ask for hand outs but i went throught hell for 11 months and i dont feel im owed any thing by fare because i know lot of the world is doing lot worse then i ever have or will but im asking to see if i can find one hearted soul on this earth to help me out. I am unable to pick any thing up but i can try if i need to would be very nice if i could have someone drop stuff off at my apartment. well hope to hear from some one soon and thank you very much in advance.

Ps. I am willing to almost anything in exchange for the person that want's to give me a free gaming computer i mean any thing.

[sadaist]

I am always saddened when one of our youth gets their first taste of real life & adulthood. Maybe someone will have this kid do some yard cleanup for a pc, but doubt he will get anything like what he is hoping for. Maybe he should concentrate on his education right now. Seems like he could use some help in the writing skills department.

[ZahZoo]

I am always saddened when one of our youth gets their first taste of real life & adulthood. Maybe someone will have this kid do some yard cleanup for a pc, but doubt he will get anything like what he is hoping for. Maybe he should concentrate on his education right now. Seems like he could use some help in the writing skills department.

I'd have a hard time even offering such an idiot a job mowing my lawn in exchange for a meal and 10 bucks. No way I'd even consider giving this kid a computer... much less a "gaming" computer. It's the last thing the lazyass punk needs... There's far more people much more deserving of a hand up. This fucker needs to starve on the streets for a while to get his priorities aligned.

When I read crap like this I too wonder what happened to their basic education. Clearly, texting is at the core of this communication style... but I don't buy it as even a semi-valid excuse. The use of sentence structure, punctuation, etc... was clearly taught to them before these fools got a cell phone in thier hands.

I feel like the Bill Cosby of the technology world... seeing youth throw away all those of us worked so hard to achieve, by dumbing down launguage and lifestyles to a totally pathetic level...

[bueno bob]

What he needs is a kick in the fucking balls.

[chefcraig]

The abject failure of communication skills is almost tolerable, considering what passes for intelligence, life experience and even simple typing skills these days. What is not acceptable is the startling sense of entitlement that is depicted. Yep, the world owes you a living these days, and God forbid, nothing that occurs in your lifetime can ever be your own fault. What a surprise in this day and age, when kids in athletic leagues are given trophies not for displaying any sort of skills or accomplishment, but for merely showing up.

Welcome to the future, ladies and gentlemen. One comprised of never ending litigation amongst utter nitwits that refuse to accept even the slightest amount of responsibility for their own actions.

[Coyote]

Idiocracy, here we come!

[standin]

This craigs list caught my eye this morning while I was lurking another board. Made me LOL.

I know it's is not an actual CL, there was no link... but it was still so funny
But funny as can be.


AN ACTUAL
CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD


To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in
Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 2009-05-27, 1:43 a.m.
E.S.T.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded
that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend,
threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings.
I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important
message.



First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect
you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my
jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a
reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 A CP
pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that
very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when
pointed at your head ... isn't it?!



I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come
from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking
bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me.
[That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug
us again].



After I called your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your
cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and
filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas
station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150
gallons and was extremely grateful!



I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along
with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]



I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was
parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed
the entire driver's side of the car.



Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma
Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little
over a day no w, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in
two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while
mentioning President Obama as my possible target.


The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat
(I guess while
he traced your number etc.).



In a way,
perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of
retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I
wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate
pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect
upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.
Remember, next time you might not be so
lucky.

Have a good
day!

Thoughtfully
yours,

Alex


However, it is wrong and illegal to rob, even robbing a robber.
And you should not strong arm anyone.
lol.. and all the other stuff in the post, is wrong too...boys and girls.

[Kristy]

The abject failure of communication skills is almost tolerable, considering what passes for intelligence, life experience and even simple typing skills these days.

It's more than [his] lack of intelligence, it's what he thinks passes for intelligence. Did anyone notice how he capitalizes "Gaming Computer" and not [sic] world of warcraft? No wonder his (alleged) wife left him, he can't seem to find any means of employment at 22 but knows full well of the meaning of the term "hand out." Zoo made some excellent points but this goes beyond the cell phone usage and text speak.

[yah]

I liked Standin's post.....good one ,there!

[Anonymous]

Look, we choose one hundred thousand intelligent, competent, handy people... we *ahem* put down the rest... we start over... perfect world.

Gimme a computer so I can play World of Warcraft without lag??

Seriously... we need to do it...

Cheers! :bottle:

[GAR]

Vintage 100 w Van Halen Marshall (http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/msg/1369677655.html)

Vintage 100 w Van Halen Marshall (Sin city)


Date: 2009-09-11, 1:03PM PDT
Reply to: sale-2rcga-1369677655@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads? (http://www.craigslist.org/about/help/replying_to_posts)]}
<hr>
http://images.craigslist.org/3m43o03l15Ob5Pc5R499bd654517f470e1bde.jpghttp://images.craigslist.org/3na3k33p05O75Q85S299ba607b3877793110f.jpg
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[twonabomber]

I was just going through the computer section of the Houston Craigslist when this ad caught my attention.


that's nothing. a guy on one of the car forums i frequent was asking for donations to help pay his car payment.

[Little Texan]

that's nothing. a guy on one of the car forums i frequent was asking for donations to help pay his car payment.

People like that REALLY piss me off!

[twonabomber]

it was funny...couple Christmases ago a girl had started a sob story thread about her and her husband's situation, and admitted that she bought a car she couldn't afford and now they were going to lose it. one of the mods started a donation drive, she held on to the car for another couple months but then lost it. then this guy mentions everyone's generosity toward her in his appeal for donations and everyone ripped him a new ass for asking for a handout.

[Hardrock69]

Fucking stupid kid.

Oh well. He gots to learn.

[Anonymous]

it was funny...couple Christmases ago a girl had started a sob story thread about her and her husband's situation, and admitted that she bought a car she couldn't afford and now they were going to lose it. one of the mods started a donation drive, she held on to the car for another couple months but then lost it. then this guy mentions everyone's generosity toward her in his appeal for donations and everyone ripped him a new ass for asking for a handout.

That's because the first was a chick, and the second wasn't.

No love hole=no monees.

Cheers! :bottle:

[Little Texan]

Here's another example of a beggar being choosey, this time from the local craigslist. Again we have the sob story, the poor spelling and grammar, and the list of particulars the machine must be capable of. This asshole wants a free laptop because he is too disabled to work and broke, right? Yet, what does he want the free laptop for? To take online courses, which, the last I checked aren't exactly free. I am so fucking sick of these craigslist e-beggars! Hey assholes, NEWSFLASH, McDonald's and all the other fast food joints are ALWAYS hiring, so get a fucking job like everybody else and buy your own shit!

Link (http://easttexas.craigslist.org/sys/1376787323.html)

pc please

hello my name is james lee and i have been deemed disabled due to my heart diabities ,high blood pressure and among other things. i am asking for a donation of a pc where at least i can further my education i am wanting to take some courses online ,and since i have been taken off work i have lost everything. i have filed for disability but we all know how long that takes.i perfer a lap top because i cant sit at a desk very long but i will accept a desk top . it has to have at least a 80 gig hd ,512 memory,and windows xp service pack 3 with wirless internet capable.my phone number is 903-733-7934 u can call any time. i dont sleep much that is another reason i need a pc maybe if i have something to utelize my time in a constructive manner may be it would help my physical and mental problems i have .thank you very much and god bless

[Anonymous]

Fuck, the motherfucker wants it all ready to go. He wants Windows XP with the Service Pack 3 already installed and everything, so he won't have the trouble of installing it.

And to prove I'm a verstaile guy when it comes to humour, I'll post my first nerdy joke ever.

Haha, joke's on him, the Service Pack 3 actually makes XP WORSE and more unstable, haha.

Damn, this is a wastrel with class, eh? "Oi, I 'need' something and I want it perfect, and right now!"

Damn.

Cheers! :bottle:

[Coyote]

Shit, there's a lot of things I want as well, but I wouldn't put it up on Craigslist...

Or anywhere else, come to think of it.

[Anonymous]

Shit, there's a lot of things I want as well, but I wouldn't put it up on Craigslist...

Or anywhere else, come to think of it.

Yeah. Just think:

"Hello. I'm a lazy motherfucker who would like to spend all my time lying in bed.

For that effect, I desperately need a genetically enhanced generously breasted blonde. Also, she must come with similar-traited brunette, and if possible, I'd also like a redhead.

I won't accept this packge if a black woman with a vast backside is not included, and there MUST be a Japanese schoolgirl in there as well.

Serious offers only. They must know how to cook proper gourmet food, clean, and be able to give oral love for no less than two hours. I don't mean talking about love, by the way.

You pay for the postage, I don't wanna."

Heh. Who'd be arsehole enough to come up with THAT, eh?

Cheers! :bottle:

[Mushroom]

I think a lot of these idiots are only scammers looking for a bleeding heart gullible enough to donate $ or other

[Nitro Express]

I think a lot of these idiots are only scammers looking for a bleeding heart gullible enough to donate $ or other

Yup. If the kid really was that stupid he wouldn't know how to post on Craig's List.