Goddamn it, not even IKEA meatballs are safe anymore??

[FORD]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=se79v-EKvDM

[Mushroom]

Maybe horse meat is delicious! But I want to know. IKEA's food is not much better than the rest of the other diarrhea-inducing fast-food/strip mall junk foods.

[sadaist]

Isn't IKEA a furniture store? You shouldn't be buying lunch from a furniture store.

[FORD]

Isn't IKEA a furniture store? You shouldn't be buying lunch from a furniture store.

If you have never been to an IKEA, you don't get it......

The store is like one huge fucking maze that you have to walk completely through to get out of alive. And they have a "cafeteria" strategically located right in the middle, so you'll have energy to walk the second half.

Now you don't necessarily have to eat the meatballs... you can buy bags of Swedish Fish or cookies or whatever if you want to try to survive on pure sugar. That type of food is also located in the middle of the maze.

http://americanapersona.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/ikea_floor_plan1.jpg

[BITEYOASS]

Can envy_me add something to this subject?

[DLR Bridge]

No food court in the one by me, but come to think of it, there are dumps of Swedish fish by the registers. WTF?

[BITEYOASS]

And this is the reason why people should avoid processed meat products altogether. No IKEA horse balls for me!

[FORD]

Can envy_me add something to this subject?

She's a vegan, so she probably just has a salad anyway.

[Matt White]

Horse ballz for all!!!

[Nitro Express]

This month the IKEA food stand is selling horse balls. Next month horse asshole will be on the menu.

[BITEYOASS]

IKEA must be getting their food ideas from the game show "Fear Factor". I wonder if Joe Rogan has a role in this?

[Nitro Express]

IKEA must be getting their food ideas from the game show "Fear Factor". I wonder if Joe Rogan has a role in this?
Andrew Zimmerman will be coming to IKEA next month to film himself eating horse asshole. They will be breaded and deep fried in batter and kind of look like donuts.

9598

[ZahZoo]

We don't have any of them horse meat furniture stores... I ain't driving 5 hours to Dallas, Tx for crappy meatballs...

[Nickdfresh]

You know, I don't see what the big deal is. German soldiers at Stalingrad would have given their left testicle for a bucket of that horse-tainted hamburger. Hell, I've seen WWII pic's of desperate (Berliners I think) civilians decently attired, rushing out to carve up a recently expired mare - kind of reminds you how good we have it...

That's not to say the bastards who knowingly sold it don't deserve prison and fines. A lot of the equestrian delights sold were from steroid infested racing horses...

[chefcraig]

Isn't IKEA a furniture store? You shouldn't be buying lunch from a furniture store.

Reminds me of when McDonald's started selling salad in the early eighties. At the time, I thought "You don't buy bread baked at a Hess station, so why buy salad from a hamburger joint?" Next thing ya know, Wendy's introduced the All-You-Can-Stuff-On-The-Plate salad bar for a buck and a quarter, and Americans have been turning into obese slobs ever since. You simply have not lived until you've seen an entire family (mom, dad and the twins) of these potato chip munching, 7/11 Enormous Gulp straw sucking assholes appropriate every last one of your store's electric shopping carts, because the simple act of waddling around in their loose-fitting and wrongly named jogging pants exhausts them toward passing out.

[Nitro Express]

The US started getting fat when more people went from blue collar jobs to white collar jobs. They went from busting their asses on farms, job sites, steel mills and such into cubicles drinking large gas station mugs full of soda pop and eating donuts.

Civilizations go in cycles and it's usually prosperity that becomes the death nail. I was talking so someone who just got back from India. He says the new wealth in the cities there are getting fat, putting off having children, and living the decadent materialistic lifestyle. The working class in the country still have a lot of children (free farm hands) and are thin because they have to work hard. The US was not too much different a few generations back. In most households most people didn't even go to college. It's a cycle.

[Nitro Express]

You know, I don't see what the big deal is. German soldiers at Stalingrad would have given their left testicle for a bucket of that horse-tainted hamburger. Hell, I've seen WWII pic's of desperate (Berliners I think) civilians decently attired, rushing out to carve up a recently expired mare - kind of reminds you how good we have it...

That's not to say the bastards who knowingly sold it don't deserve prison and fines. A lot of the equestrian delights sold were from steroid infested racing horses...

As long as the meat isn't spoiled. My favorite pair of biker boots are made from horsehide. I assumed they used the meat for dog food but I guess it's going to IKEA instead. No one's dog ever died from eating horse meat. They just die from Chinese dog food.

[chefcraig]

The US started getting fat when more people went from blue collar jobs to white collar jobs. They went from busting their asses on farms, job sites, steel mills and such into cubicles drinking large gas station mugs full of soda pop and eating donuts.

WHAT? You are saying everyone woke up one morning and decided to get a job on AMC's Mad Men? Yep, that explains it, alright...


http://i915.photobucket.com/albums/ac359/rowlffdogg/allin.jpg

[jhale667]

The US started getting fat when more people went from blue collar jobs to white collar jobs.

Actually, the rise in obesity in America can be directly tied to the advent of processed foods, and in particular the introduction of high fructose corn poison into the American diet.

[Nitro Express]

WHAT? You are saying everyone woke up one morning and decided to get a job on AMC's Mad Men? Yep, that explains it, alright...


http://i915.photobucket.com/albums/ac359/rowlffdogg/allin.jpg

Actually they had to replace the seats at Yankee stadium in the 1960's because people were getting too big to fit in them. So yeah. Your Madman theory might be on the money there. Look at the decadence in the photo. You know that guy didn't stay thin.

[chefcraig]

Actually, the rise in obesity in America can be directly tied to the advent of processed foods, and in particular the introduction of high fructose corn poison into the American diet.

Plus that weird crap put into milk that makes twelve year olds have breasts the size of Mount Rushmore.

[vandeleur]

Actually they had to replace the seats at Yankee stadium in the 1960's because people were getting too big to fit in them. So yeah. Your Madman theory might be on the money there. Look at the decadence in the photo. You know that guy didn't stay thin.

When I look at that photo I think boobs :D

[Nitro Express]

Actually, the rise in obesity in America can be directly tied to the advent of processed foods, and in particular the introduction of high fructose corn poison into the American diet.

Portion sizes. I rarely can eat everything when I eat out because they serve the amount of food for one that normally would feed four people. Coca Cola originally came in 7 ounce bottles. Then Pepsi came out with 12 ounce and everyone went to 12 ounces so Pepsi would not have the more for less advantage. Then the two liter bottle came out in the 1970's. They were big glass bottles. I can remember seeing some dude at Newport Beach chugging Pepsi out of one and I thought that was the most obscene thing ever.

Then you had the serve yourself bottomless soda pop machines. Then you had the big gas station mugs. Nobody drinks a 7 ounce Coke anymore. They drink a gallon of it. Then you have all the other carbohydrates. This is also the biggest killer in the US. People are literally eating themselves to death. Too much sugar and obscene portions of food.

[FORD]

Plus that weird crap put into milk that makes twelve year olds have breasts the size of Mount Rushmore.

You would think that would have been a no-brainer. After all, they gave the shit to the cows so they would produce milk earlier and more often, so how could it not cross their mind that it would have a similar effect on females of another species that consumed the hormones second hand.

Of course these same cows are already eating MonSatan's mutant corn, so it's not like they're the healthiest critters on earth anyway.

Come to think of it, if the horses are only eating hay, maybe horse meat ain't all that bad. (Except for the steroid injected race horses, of course)

[Nitro Express]

When I look at that photo I think boobs :D

The pill came out in 1961 and AIDS wouldn't be on the scene until the 1980's. I would have fucked them all silly and then enjoyed a nice cigarette afterwards.

[Nitro Express]

You would think that would have been a no-brainer. After all, they gave the shit to the cows so they would produce milk earlier and more often, so how could it not cross their mind that it would have a similar effect on females of another species that consumed the hormones second hand.

Of course these same cows are already eating MonSatan's mutant corn, so it's not like they're the healthiest critters on earth anyway.

Come to think of it, if the horses are only eating hay, maybe horse meat ain't all that bad. (Except for the steroid injected race horses, of course)

I used to work at this boarding stable and one of the hands would reach into the horse meal bin and grab some horse feed and eat it. It's kind of like Granola with oats and molasses in it. What this guy didn't know is the protein base in it was chicken shit. It's a common practice to use chicken shit in horse feed. Chicken shit Granola. Maybe that will be the next thing they sell at IKEA.

[Nitro Express]

Speaking of food. Check this cookbook out Ford.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Sriracha-Cookbook-Rooster-Recipes/dp/1607740036/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1361991996&sr=8-1&keywords=siracha+cookbooks

[chefcraig]

You would think that would have been a no-brainer. After all, they gave the shit to the cows so they would produce milk earlier and more often, so how could it not cross their mind that it would have a similar effect on females of another species that consumed the hormones second hand.


When I look at that photo I think boobs :D

Not that it's necessarily a bad thing once they grow up...


http://img1.imagehousing.com/81/85d40032bae850bf4589166620e29d1d.jpg (http://www.imagehousing.com/image/1107220)

[Nickdfresh]

The US started getting fat when more people went from blue collar jobs to white collar jobs. They went from busting their asses on farms, job sites, steel mills and such into cubicles drinking large gas station mugs full of soda pop and eating donuts.

Civilizations go in cycles and it's usually prosperity that becomes the death nail. I was talking so someone who just got back from India. He says the new wealth in the cities there are getting fat, putting off having children, and living the decadent materialistic lifestyle. The working class in the country still have a lot of children (free farm hands) and are thin because they have to work hard. The US was not too much different a few generations back. In most households most people didn't even go to college. It's a cycle.

That's part of it. But you also have to acknowledge that our life expectancies are far greater than they were. Also, during The Great Depression - people were "thin" but many in working class jobs (assuming they were lucky enough to have one) were malnourished and this was a real problem the U.S. Army had to deal with when the first peacetime (in the U.S.) took place and large numbers of conscripts had to be rejected...

The problem is that food, especially unhealthy food, is the cheapest that it's ever been. And food manufacturers are whizzes at turning their shit into caloric, addictive delights filled with processed flour, corn syrup, fats, sodium, and other chemicals designed to cheaply make them into addicting cupboard fare. The only real cycle is the chickens coming home to roost. The tie your Indian "friend" is trying to make between prosperity and obesity is a tenuous cliche at best as most of the obese we speak of in the U.S. are not "rich" by any means and those of higher socioeconomic status often are enjoying much better health and probably are in good shape more often than not...

[Nitro Express]

Not that it's necessarily a bad thing once they grow up...


http://img1.imagehousing.com/81/85d40032bae850bf4589166620e29d1d.jpg (http://www.imagehousing.com/image/1107220)

Yeah I would roll in the sand with her.

[Nickdfresh]

Actually they had to replace the seats at Yankee stadium in the 1960's because people were getting too big to fit in them. So yeah. Your Madman theory might be on the money there. Look at the decadence in the photo. You know that guy didn't stay thin.

Are you kidding? Don Draper gets regular cardiovascular workouts in the form of full contact aerobics!

[sadaist]

If you have never been to an IKEA, you don't get it......


I went to one once. One entrance and the exit is way at the other end of a gigantic maze. Being claustrophobic I started freaking out because I couldn't find an exit. Started running following some damn arrows on the floor. What set me off is I couldn't see any doors or windows.....= no way out. When I finally got to the exit I was sweating, heart racing, near full mode panic attack.

No way dude. I'll never go back for modular furniture I gotta put together myself.

[Zing!]

Yeah, it's pretty degrading; you're like human cattle being shuffled along until you reach the feed bags at the end.

[Nitro Express]

I went to one once. One entrance and the exit is way at the other end of a gigantic maze. Being claustrophobic I started freaking out because I couldn't find an exit. Started running following some damn arrows on the floor. What set me off is I couldn't see any doors or windows.....= no way out. When I finally got to the exit I was sweating, heart racing, near full mode panic attack.

No way dude. I'll never go back for modular furniture I gotta put together myself.

Sounds like one big firetrap to me. I've driven by the big box stores with IKEA on the side of them but had about as much desire to go in one as I do a Wal-Mart or a Best Buy.

When I was moving all the time I had some of that Scandinavian modular furniture. It was ok. Did the job and because it came apart, it was easy to move.

[Nitro Express]

Yeah, it's pretty degrading; you're like human cattle being shuffled along until you reach the feed bags at the end.

Sounds like they need to rename the store to BORG BOX.

[fraroc]

I'm suddenly reminded of the very first episode of Bobs Burgers AKA the "Human Flesh" episode. I love that show by the way XD

I really hope this isn't true, horses are some of the most beautiful animals in existence.

[envy_me]

I hate IKEA. I despise everything they stand for. I'd rather not go there at all. I had to go like 6 months ago to buy some chairs for the shop I am working in. There is no way of getting out. Even if there was a way out of there, all the pregnant women and tourists that hang out there on a working day in the afternoon are so damn slooooow, and refuse to MOVE OUT OF MY FUCKING WAY, so I can just pay for the shit I had to buy and just get the hell out of there as soon as I can.

Eat there? LMAO!

[Coyote]

Eating horsemeat? How old school pagan can you get?

[Nitro Express]

I hate IKEA. I despise everything they stand for. I'd rather not go there at all. I had to go like 6 months ago to buy some chairs for the shop I am working in. There is no way of getting out. Even if there was a way out of there, all the pregnant women and tourists that hang out there on a working day in the afternoon are so damn slooooow, and refuse to MOVE OUT OF MY FUCKING WAY, so I can just pay for the shit I had to buy and just get the hell out of there as soon as I can.

Eat there? LMAO!

Someone should start a chain of easy access, making shopping easy stores and name them BUY SHIT. Come to BUY SHIT. Find what you want easy and get out fast! Wal-Mart should be renamed to DIP-SHIT.

[Nitro Express]

after 7 years loyal service, was made redundant and offered no help or support what-so-ever from the management. the worse thing was the founder I.K. visited our store and shook us all by the hand and said thank you for the great effort and we were above target. then as soon as he left we got the redundancy notices. accept a huge pay cut and take flexible hours or bye bye. tried to take them to tribunal but they hid behind data protection act. i have never known a firm to treat its staff so shamefully as IKEA CROYDON

Sounds like the typical big box nightmare. It sucks for customers and even worse for employees.

[BITEYOASS]

nuff said!

9605

It's also an analogy of how Team USA will beat Sweden at the World Hockey Championship this year. :bigwink:

[fraroc]

I hate IKEA. I despise everything they stand for. I'd rather not go there at all. I had to go like 6 months ago to buy some chairs for the shop I am working in. There is no way of getting out. Even if there was a way out of there, all the pregnant women and tourists that hang out there on a working day in the afternoon are so damn slooooow, and refuse to MOVE OUT OF MY FUCKING WAY, so I can just pay for the shit I had to buy and just get the hell out of there as soon as I can.

Eat there? LMAO!

I like IKEA because of cinnamon rolls and that spiced Christmas wine and that's all.

[envy_me]

I like IKEA because of cinnamon rolls and that spiced Christmas wine and that's all.

I don't have to go to Ikea for that :D i still have 4 bottles of the spiced Christmas wine at home :-)

[envy_me]

nuff said!

9605

It's also an analogy of how Team USA will beat Sweden at the World Hockey Championship this year. :bigwink:

Yeah, right... Dream on :D We ate steroid horse, we can beat anybody :D