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View Full Version : You Cretins Have Any Summer Plans?



Kristy
06-23-2015, 08:24 PM
Yes, summer is here in the midst of global warming, shitty band reunion tours and rerun TV. It might rain all summer then again, it might not...much.

I took up horse riding lessons for the hands free cheap orgasms and and the expensive rider wear which will make me feel like a Blue Blood when I crush all you peasants when I come into power.

http://www.denverridinglessons.com/Lessons.html

Flat and Jump - 2x/Week on School Horse - $375/month

Eh, beats a crappy vacation in some shithole somewhere.

So, what are your plans besides collecting unemployment and refraining from daylight in the confines of your parent's basements?

Phil theStalker
06-23-2015, 08:46 PM
Yes, summer is here in the midst of global warming, shitty band reunion tours and rerun TV. It might rain all summer then again, it might not...much.

I took up horse riding lessons for the hands free cheap orgasms and and the expensive rider wear which will make me feel like a Blue Blood when I crush all you peasants when I come into power.

http://www.denverridinglessons.com/Lessons.html

Flat and Jump - 2x/Week on School Horse - $375/month

Eh, beats a crappy vacation in some shithole somewhere.

So, what are your plans besides collecting unemployment and refraining from daylight in the confines of your parent's basements?

I got/a BEECH HoUSe I kan't af/FoRD t2O goe T2o. 13105:monekyr:HoW'S DAT f4or semi-WEELTHY?/? I'm PaRT aff da .0000001%.

Nitro Express
06-24-2015, 04:15 AM
Chicks and horses. Never got what the appeal was but then I guess chicks dig something powerful between their legs. Have fun and ride safe.

Seshmeister
06-24-2015, 06:32 AM
Ironically I've been looking at going to Crete for a couple of weeks later in the year.

Diamondjimi
06-24-2015, 07:37 AM
What am i doing this summer?

None of your goddamn business....

WARF
06-24-2015, 03:20 PM
You cretins better suck her toes and kneel before her horse when she comes through your town!

http://nakednaturegirls.net/naked-nature-girls/2014/05/horse-riding-in-the-country-2.jpg

Green Manalishi
06-25-2015, 01:30 PM
Ever watch those Hannah And Her Horse commercials ? Oh yeah.......

hambon4lif
06-25-2015, 02:22 PM
This summer involves quite a bit of travel. I have to fly out to Denver and Portland for two meetings with some rich folks and pitch them my movie idea to see if they will give it some financial backing so we could stop fucking around and get this thing into production.

The movie?

Well...in the opening scene, Scarlett Johansen drops her panties to the bathroom floor and steps into the shower. You're thinking this is already cinema fucking gold, right? It gets better....
She finishes showering and looks down at the floor to find her panties are missing, they are now gone. Extreme violence and chaos ensues, as everyone in the city is literally killing each other in the streets in a desperate search for this particular pair of panties.
And time is of the essence, even crucial, to locate and recover them immediately, especially while they still have a few good whiffs in them.
As is the genesis with movies, this story has a happy ending, but it's better not to tell and give away too much.
Right now it doesn't have a title, although it does have a few working titles....."For The Scent Of The Scarlett Biscuit" or "If Loving You Is Thong, I Don't Want To Be Right".

There really isn't much as far as competition.....shitty remakes of classics and boring-as-all-fuck movies with predictable storylines are all Hollywood has to offer at the moment. There's not another flick like this one. I see it lighting the box office on fire.

And when it starts to take off and make me mega-rich, I will have hit the jackpot and have the money to buy my own house, and after 46 freeloading years, finally move out of my parents basement.

This is a make or break summer, and I am going to OWN it, motherfucker!!!!:thumb:

Von Halen
06-25-2015, 03:00 PM
This summer involves quite a bit of travel. I have to fly out to Denver and Portland for two meetings with some rich folks and pitch them my movie idea to see if they will give it some financial backing so we could stop fucking around and get this thing into production.

The movie?

Well...in the opening scene, Scarlett Johansen drops her panties to the bathroom floor and steps into the shower. You're thinking this is already cinema fucking gold, right? It gets better....
She finishes showering and looks down at the floor to find her panties are missing, they are now gone. Extreme violence and chaos ensues, as everyone in the city is literally killing each other in the streets in a desperate search for this particular pair of panties.
And time is of the essence, even crucial, to locate and recover them immediately, especially while they still have a few good whiffs in them.
As is the genesis with movies, this story has a happy ending, but it's better not to tell and give away too much.
Right now it doesn't have a title, although it does have a few working titles....."For The Scent Of The Scarlett Biscuit" or "If Loving You Is Thong, I Don't Want To Be Right".

There really isn't much as far as competition.....shitty remakes of classics and boring-as-all-fuck movies with predictable storylines are all Hollywood has to offer at the moment. There's not another flick like this one. I see it lighting the box office on fire.

And when it starts to take off and make me mega-rich, I will have hit the jackpot and have the money to buy my own house, and after 46 freeloading years, finally move out of my parents basement.

This is a make or break summer, and I am going to OWN it, motherfucker!!!!:thumb:

You are fucked. Scarlett doesn't wear panties. :D

twonabomber
06-25-2015, 04:21 PM
You are fucked. Scarlett doesn't wear panties. :D

You only know this because I told you!

Kristy
06-25-2015, 06:10 PM
Ever watch those Hannah And Her Horse commercials ? Oh yeah.......

You're sick, dude.

Kristy
06-26-2015, 10:18 AM
Just found out Tom Selleck’s daughter, Hannah loves to ride.
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/12/06/article-0-0F0CA20800000578-643_224x423.jpg

My GAWD, that girl is homely.

Von Halen
06-26-2015, 10:20 AM
Just found out Tom Selleck’s daughter, Hannah loves to ride.
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/12/06/article-0-0F0CA20800000578-643_224x423.jpg

My GAWD, that girl is homely.

I'd fuck her.

Seshmeister
06-26-2015, 11:23 AM
Until she was a little hoarse... :)

Kristy
06-26-2015, 12:56 PM
I'd fuck her.

Hardly. For one, she has a pulse.

Diamondjimi
06-26-2015, 08:25 PM
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/50/a8/89/50a8899d5d83fb13d67983b85f61efb6.jpg

Phil theStalker
06-26-2015, 09:55 PM
:erection::cincodemayo::wanker::jizzz:13135

I'm GO/iNg t2O MEXiCoE!

Dan
06-27-2015, 02:43 AM
Its Winter Down Here, So Enjoy Your Summer,Peeps.:)

DONNIEP
06-27-2015, 03:00 AM
Its Winter Down Here, So Enjoy Your Summer,Peeps.:)

I intend to turn myself the color of an old beer bottle this summer. A really nice shade of brown. Same as every other year that I've been running around raising hell on this planet...

Seshmeister
06-27-2015, 05:43 AM
Turning brown means you have damaged your skin.

A man your age shouldn't risk it, you'll get cancer and totally die.

DONNIEP
06-27-2015, 08:27 AM
Turning brown means you have damaged your skin.

A man your age shouldn't risk it, you'll get cancer and totally die.

News Flash: We're gonna totally die anyways.

Phil theStalker
07-03-2015, 12:08 AM
:monekyl::erection:13136:monekyr::wanker::jizzz::j izzz:

Iuujnm yhy

I BEn paKing. I/m GoiNG WHeRE EE/vun mmmy celly phoney won/t werky.

WARF
07-03-2015, 12:59 AM
News Flash: We're gonna totally die anyways.

Don't get pissed at Sesh.

You have a longer after life than his religion! ;)

Seshmeister
07-03-2015, 05:22 AM
News Flash: We're gonna totally die anyways.

You don't want to lose the elderly veteran confused cranky years - look how much fun Zahzoo is having.

Seshmeister
07-03-2015, 05:25 AM
Don't get pissed at Sesh.

You have a longer after life than his religion! ;)

Quality not quantity...

http://flyingspaghettimonster.wikia.com/wiki/Pastafarianism


Pastafarians believe in Heaven, an afterlife which contains beer volcanoes and a stripper factory. Their morals are guided by the eight Condiments, although two were lost and never recovered, which many see as a sign that Flying Spaghetti Monster won't mind if you skim some of the rules.

ZahZoo
07-03-2015, 11:12 AM
You don't want to lose the elderly veteran confused cranky years - look how much fun Zahzoo is having.

Damn right!! I'm having a blast!!

Plus turning brown too... it just don't look right sitting in your boat on the lake in the summer fully clothed. A little sunscreen and you're good to go. Nobody gets out of here alive...

DONNIEP
07-03-2015, 02:02 PM
Damn right!! I'm having a blast!!

Plus turning brown too... it just don't look right sitting in your boat on the lake in the summer fully clothed. A little sunscreen and you're good to go. Nobody gets out of here alive...

Sunscreen? What's that?

I recommend White 2 Black Extreme tanning lotion. Not only will you be tanned like the hide on a leather football, it helps alleviate the symptoms of White Guilt. It's on sale too and in stock at Donmart, right next to the Confederate Flags.

vandeleur
07-03-2015, 02:14 PM
Donniep , there was a guy on the news near where you live , america or sumit. He had an ar15 and was fucking about in a shopping mall.
I thought result it's Donnie gone rogue on brown ale and white guilt.

DONNIEP
07-03-2015, 03:18 PM
Donniep , there was a guy on the news near where you live , america or sumit. He had an ar15 and was fucking about in a shopping mall.
I thought result it's Donnie gone rogue on brown ale and white guilt.

Luckily I do not suffer from White Guilt. However I am afflicted with Brown Ale syndrome. Sadly there is no cure at this time...

WARF
07-03-2015, 04:16 PM
Quality not quantity...

http://flyingspaghettimonster.wikia.com/wiki/Pastafarianism

I found two other relgions I wanna join....

Church of the subgenius

and

Church of euthanasia


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Church_of_Euthanasia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Church_of_the_SubGenius


Both are black comedy satires of church.... with real memberships.... Pee Wee Herman belongs to the sub genius one.... lol

Kristy
07-03-2015, 05:37 PM
Luckily I do not suffer from White Guilt. However I am afflicted with Brown Ale syndrome. Sadly there is no cure at this time...

You sure it isn't F A T Walmart Syndrome?


Krist, I have never seen so many F A T fucks pushing shopping carts pulling the most unhealthy food there is off the shelves with their F A T F L U B B Y fingers. And the really F A T ones are found at the free food samples shoving F A T turd burgers in their F A T G R U B B Y mouths. Such unattractive F A T people. Disgusting human beings with heart disease pushing a shopping cart. Fucking sad.

Kristy
07-03-2015, 05:43 PM
Check it out
http://cdnll.doversaddlery.com/images/xl/0038855.jpg

Tredstep riding boot Spanish cut style. Eh, a lower-end riding boot but they might come in handy when the New World Order arrives and I need to look good while crushing the skulls of peasants underneath of them.

This is turning out to be one expensive summer hobby.

DONNIEP
07-03-2015, 08:26 PM
You sure it isn't F A T Walmart Syndrome?


Krist, I have never seen so many F A T fucks pushing shopping carts pulling the most unhealthy food there is off the shelves with their F A T F L U B B Y fingers. And the really F A T ones are found at the free food samples shoving F A T turd burgers in their F A T G R U B B Y mouths. Such unattractive F A T people. Disgusting human beings with heart disease pushing a shopping cart. Fucking sad.

You ain't lying. Holy crap, my Walmart needs to buy a couple dozen of those Fat Scooters...

vandeleur
07-03-2015, 08:48 PM
You ain't lying. Holy crap, my Walmart needs to buy a couple dozen of those Fat Scooters...

Nasa needs to invent them floating chubby chairs off Wall-e

DONNIEP
07-03-2015, 09:36 PM
http://youtu.be/AfSiRFgxa-c

Igosplut
07-05-2015, 08:27 PM
You don't want to lose the elderly veteran confused cranky years - look how much fun Zahzoo is having.

Some of us faster than others.......

Phil theStalker
07-15-2015, 12:07 AM
Some of us faster than others.......
Dat's caLLed PREE-MATuRde E-jack-U-LAtor!

I shUD kNnow.:yo::amen::amen::boobeyes::wanker:

Phil theStalker
07-15-2015, 01:35 AM
This summer involves quite a bit of travel. I have to fly out to Denver and Portland for two meetings with some rich folks and pitch them my movie idea to see if they will give it some financial backing so we could stop fucking around and get this thing into production.

The movie?

Well...in the opening scene, Scarlett Johansen drops her panties to the bathroom floor and steps into the shower. You're thinking this is already cinema fucking gold, right? It gets better....
She finishes showering and looks down at the floor to find her panties are missing, they are now gone. Extreme violence and chaos ensues, as everyone in the city is literally killing each other in the streets in a desperate search for this particular pair of panties.
And time is of the essence, even crucial, to locate and recover them immediately, especially while they still have a few good whiffs in them.
As is the genesis with movies, this story has a happy ending, but it's better not to tell and give away too much.
Right now it doesn't have a title, although it does have a few working titles....."For The Scent Of The Scarlett Biscuit" or "If Loving You Is Thong, I Don't Want To Be Right".

There really isn't much as far as competition.....shitty remakes of classics and boring-as-all-fuck movies with predictable storylines are all Hollywood has to offer at the moment. There's not another flick like this one. I see it lighting the box office on fire.

And when it starts to take off and make me mega-rich, I will have hit the jackpot and have the money to buy my own house, and after 46 freeloading years, finally move out of my parents basement.

This is a make or break summer, and I am going to OWN it, motherfucker!!!!:thumb:
:devildance::cheer::first: . :littlebong: .....:thumb:
.....13194
:hail: :hail::hail:..... :bong2:

MMAKe dA PAN/ties ED/ibul/!! :yo:

PETE'S BROTHER
08-04-2015, 04:00 PM
next week, i will be drinkin' here...

13378

or divin' from here...

13379

ZahZoo
08-05-2015, 08:23 AM
Spent a week here... week before last. Los Cabos area in between Cabo San Jose and Cabo San Lucas. Nice place... great food!! Only downside was the port authority shut down all dive and fishing trips due to a hurricane 200 miles off-shore... made no sense the seas were only 4-8 foot in the area. Been fishing off Hawaii in 10-15 foot seas no problem... Mexican pussies...

http://cms.posadas.com/posadas/Brands/FAG/Region/Mexico/Hotels/FLC/Catalogs/Media/FALC/1120x560/genericas/fiesta_americana_grand_los_cabos_golf_and_generica s_01_low.jpg

PETE'S BROTHER
08-05-2015, 12:22 PM
13382

view from our place there

cabo villas beach resort