Why preachers need private planes.

[Seshmeister]

So now you know...

[Anonymous]

Makes perfect sense to me.

I was a bit unsure at first, but when they said they couldn't get inside a long tube filled with demons, aka the plebeians, & how it gnaws at your heart & soul to have to fly with & breathe the same air as the unwashed peasant masses, I could relate.

That's why I own a car, so I don't have to take the bus.

Shit, I gotta work on getting me one of them private jet-propelled aeroplanes too.

[Satan]

Well, the problem isn't so much that the preacher CANT talk to my Former Employer on a commercial plane. It's that if he does, he's likely to be taken into custody, and possibly suspected of terrorism. http://www.cosgan.de/images/smilie/teufel/d025.gif

[DONNIEP]

Well, the problem isn't so much that the preacher CANT talk to my Former Employer on a commercial plane. It's that if he does, he's likely to be taken into custody, and possibly suspected of terrorism. http://www.cosgan.de/images/smilie/teufel/d025.gif

Not if he's speaking the Chosen Language - American!! That's right, everybody else in the world is going to hell except for Americans. And Mexicans, they get a pass on not speaking American because they love them some Jesus. So everybody except for Americans and Mexicans. All the Catholics are going to Hell too, aside from Mexican Catholics. So everybody except for Americans and Mexicans and Mexican Catholics. And American Muslims gotta go to Hell too. I know, they speak American just fine. But they don't have Jesus in their hearts so they gots to go. So basically only white, black, Mexican and other farners who speak American and live in America and love Jesus get to go to heaven. And the Jews. I think there's some unwritten rule that they get in too, somehow. I'm not sure how that works. Oh and cripples and retards - they get a pass too, but only if they're American OR have at least one t shirt with some sort of American something on it.

So, yeah, that's how it works. And if you're gonna be praying whilst on a plane, be sure to say Praise Jesus out loud a couple times in American English. That way we'll know you're not a Talicong and won't have to fireboard your ass. Otherwise there's a good chance we'll toss you out the back of the plane.

[Anonymous]

And the Jews. I think there's some unwritten rule that they get in too, somehow. I'm not sure how that works.

Oh, I'm pretty sure it's written somewhere. In a business contract, quite likely. One that involved fair amounts of money exchanging hands.

It's the American way!