TwoFoolsAMinute
08-13-2004, 10:38 PM
THE RULES
The following is not affiliated with any religion, and may be posted or taught, in part or in whole, anywhere.
1. Don't kill anyone
2. Don't make a baby if you don't want one.
3. Don't try addictive drugs then whine later that you have a problem or call it a disease.
4. Don't kill any animal unless you need it for food or to protect yourself or someone else.
5. Don't have sex with children or family.
6. Change your hairstyle to one you see in an apparel catalog at least once a decade.
7. When in doubt, use a condom.
8. Don't lie if it hurts someone else.
9. Don't park on the railroad tracks, play on the railroad tracks, or cross the railroad tracks in front of a train.
10. If you disagree with someone on Television, Radio, or in Print, don't watch, listen or buy it. With no patronage, these things are discontinued.
11. Don't believe most of what you hear. You must investigate before forming solid conclusions.
12. Don't take guns, knives, weapons, drugs, alcohol, or tobacco to school.
13. Flush when you're done.
14. Regard and treat other people and things the way you would like other people to regard and treat you and your things.
15. Don't Steal.
16. Disagree. Don't fight, don't censor, don't kill, don't terrorize, just disagree.
17. All the things you never think you'll need in real life all will come in handy if you know them.
18. Don't get violent or angry toward the other drivers, you've done bonehead things too.
19. Don't spend more time watching TV than you do in conversation.
20. Games that don't teach you anything or improve physical fitness are a waste of time.
21. Don't watch more sports than news or political programming.
22. Educate yourself on the dangers to your children.
23. Don't use nuclear weapons
24. "Whatever!" is one comment that will never get you anywhere.
25. People who question whether or not they could bring a child into this awful world because it is "going all to Hell," are the only people who should have children.
26. Don't have a pet that can kill you.
27. Cash does not bounce, accrue interest, require ID, hold up the line, or charge fees.
28. You may pray anytime you want, no one is stopping you. Just don't push your beliefs on others.
29. Don't throw away your baby.
30. Do not eat feces or humans or drink urine.
31. Brush your teeth
32. Bathe
33. If everyone was honest and trustworthy, we wouldn't need most laws.
34. Committing suicide will make you miss something really good, and will be the main accomplishment you are remembered for.
35. Keep your promises.
36. Don't get a tattoo of anyone's name that can sever his or her relationship with you.
37. Just because you have the right of way doesn't mean you can take your sweet ass time.
38. Everyone is a minority.
39. There are not many job opportunities for homeless people.
40. Not all people have the religion or beliefs as you. Don't assume.
The following is not affiliated with any religion, and may be posted or taught, in part or in whole, anywhere.
1. Don't kill anyone
2. Don't make a baby if you don't want one.
3. Don't try addictive drugs then whine later that you have a problem or call it a disease.
4. Don't kill any animal unless you need it for food or to protect yourself or someone else.
5. Don't have sex with children or family.
6. Change your hairstyle to one you see in an apparel catalog at least once a decade.
7. When in doubt, use a condom.
8. Don't lie if it hurts someone else.
9. Don't park on the railroad tracks, play on the railroad tracks, or cross the railroad tracks in front of a train.
10. If you disagree with someone on Television, Radio, or in Print, don't watch, listen or buy it. With no patronage, these things are discontinued.
11. Don't believe most of what you hear. You must investigate before forming solid conclusions.
12. Don't take guns, knives, weapons, drugs, alcohol, or tobacco to school.
13. Flush when you're done.
14. Regard and treat other people and things the way you would like other people to regard and treat you and your things.
15. Don't Steal.
16. Disagree. Don't fight, don't censor, don't kill, don't terrorize, just disagree.
17. All the things you never think you'll need in real life all will come in handy if you know them.
18. Don't get violent or angry toward the other drivers, you've done bonehead things too.
19. Don't spend more time watching TV than you do in conversation.
20. Games that don't teach you anything or improve physical fitness are a waste of time.
21. Don't watch more sports than news or political programming.
22. Educate yourself on the dangers to your children.
23. Don't use nuclear weapons
24. "Whatever!" is one comment that will never get you anywhere.
25. People who question whether or not they could bring a child into this awful world because it is "going all to Hell," are the only people who should have children.
26. Don't have a pet that can kill you.
27. Cash does not bounce, accrue interest, require ID, hold up the line, or charge fees.
28. You may pray anytime you want, no one is stopping you. Just don't push your beliefs on others.
29. Don't throw away your baby.
30. Do not eat feces or humans or drink urine.
31. Brush your teeth
32. Bathe
33. If everyone was honest and trustworthy, we wouldn't need most laws.
34. Committing suicide will make you miss something really good, and will be the main accomplishment you are remembered for.
35. Keep your promises.
36. Don't get a tattoo of anyone's name that can sever his or her relationship with you.
37. Just because you have the right of way doesn't mean you can take your sweet ass time.
38. Everyone is a minority.
39. There are not many job opportunities for homeless people.
40. Not all people have the religion or beliefs as you. Don't assume.