Signs You're Being Rescued by DLR

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  • Nigel

    Signs You're Being Rescued by DLR

    1) He mutters something about being out of Demerol and offers a swig of JD.
    2) You feel a crushing pain in your chest; from the sheer volume of his ego.
    3) Halfway thru CPR, Sammy Hagar steps in to finish up.
    4) He keeps twirling, straddling and flossing his crotch with your IV stand.
    5) Diagnosis: sprained ankle, Treatment, Medical marijuana for him.
    6) Oh-Oh-Oh, Jamie's Dyin'.
    7) Leans over and whispers that while he values his ambulance partners skill's, he's pretty sure he's more successful on his own.
    8) No CPR needed. That blood curdling scream brought you back to consciousness all by itself.
    9) Pulse 85 and shallow. BP; 120 over 70. Sammy Hagar: Total Asshole.
    10) Unfortunately, he can't save you without Eddie at his side.

    Don't flame me people, just thought you could use a laugh.

    Cheers,

    Nigel
  • Matt White
    • Jun 2004
    • 20446

    #2
    Re: Signs You're Being Rescued by DLR

    Originally posted by Nigel


    Don't flame me people, just thought you could use a laugh.

    Cheers,

    Nigel
    Your flaming enough on your own, Pal. Don't quit your day job SHECKY GREEN!!!



    DAVE OR THE GRAVE BABY!!!!

    Comment

    • manwiththedogs
      Head Fluffer
      • Aug 2004
      • 381

      #3
      Originally posted by Nigel
      1) He mutters something about being out of Demerol and offers a swig of JD.
      2) You feel a crushing pain in your chest; from the sheer volume of his ego.
      3) Halfway thru CPR, Sammy Hagar steps in to finish up.
      4) He keeps twirling, straddling and flossing his crotch with your IV stand.
      5) Diagnosis: sprained ankle, Treatment, Medical marijuana for him.
      6) Oh-Oh-Oh, Jamie's Dyin'.
      7) Leans over and whispers that while he values his ambulance partners skill's, he's pretty sure he's more successful on his own.
      8) No CPR needed. That blood curdling scream brought you back to consciousness all by itself.
      9) Pulse 85 and shallow. BP; 120 over 70. Sammy Hagar: Total Asshole.
      10) Unfortunately, he can't save you without Eddie at his side.

      Don't flame me people, just thought you could use a laugh.

      Cheers,

      Nigel
      Some folks jus` be BEGGIN to be thrown into the asshole pen....

      Comment

      • Rothmanolo
        Roth Army Recruit
        • Aug 2004
        • 5

        #4
        Re: Signs You're Being Rescued by DLR

        Originally posted by Nigel
        1) He mutters something about being out of Demerol and offers a swig of JD.
        2) You feel a crushing pain in your chest; from the sheer volume of his ego.
        4) He keeps twirling, straddling and flossing his crotch with your IV stand.
        5) Diagnosis: sprained ankle, Treatment, Medical marijuana for him.
        6) Oh-Oh-Oh, Jamie's Dyin'.
        7) Leans over and whispers that while he values his ambulance partners skill's, he's pretty sure he's more successful on his own.

        Comment

        • DLR_EngineRoom
          Veteran
          • Jan 2004
          • 2304

          #5
          Originally posted by Nigel


          TOP 10 WAYS FOR NIGEL TO KNOW THAT SAMMY HAGAR IS BLOWING HIM

          1) He mutters something about being out of sperm and passes me to EVH.
          2) You feel a crushing pain in your chest; from the sheer volume of his fat ass as I'm face-sitting backstage.
          3) Halfway thru CPR, he finishes up by blasting my face while singing "Cum on baby, lemme finish what I started here".
          4) He keeps twirling, straddling and flossing his crotch with your 1/2 inch erection.
          5) Diagnosis: sprained ankle, Treatment, foot job.
          6) Words appear stating "Right Now, it's your turn to be screwed by Sammy Hagar"
          7) Leans over and whispers that while he values the Gay Male prostitute business, the industry has blown more men while he's been on tour.
          8) That blood curdling Yoko Ono influenced scream wasn't an orgasmic moan, it was Sammy singing you a love song from OU812.
          9) For quick relief of burning hemmerhoids, try "Preparation Hagaroids".
          10) Unfortunately, he can't save you until you buy a bottle of Cabo Wabo Tequila.

          Don't flame me people, I'm already a backstage flamer for the VH 2004 tour.

          Jeers,

          Nigel The Fat Faggot F***er
          Um.....er.....ok...we know you're a homosexual, not that there's anything WRONG with that but....why don't you post at the links? They're all gay there...not that there's anything WRONG with that...(?)
          http://i162.photobucket.com/albums/t.../EddieDave.jpg
          http://i162.photobucket.com/albums/t...ve_ed_2007.jpg
          http://i162.photobucket.com/albums/t...os/TORCH_B.gif

          Comment

          • DavidLeeWrath
            Head Fluffer
            • Mar 2004
            • 212

            #6
            Originally posted by Nigel
            1) He mutters something about being out of Demerol and offers a swig of JD.
            2) You feel a crushing pain in your chest; from the sheer volume of his ego.
            3) Halfway thru CPR, Sammy Hagar steps in to finish up.
            4) He keeps twirling, straddling and flossing his crotch with your IV stand.
            5) Diagnosis: sprained ankle, Treatment, Medical marijuana for him.
            6) Oh-Oh-Oh, Jamie's Dyin'.
            7) Leans over and whispers that while he values his ambulance partners skill's, he's pretty sure he's more successful on his own.
            8) No CPR needed. That blood curdling scream brought you back to consciousness all by itself.
            9) Pulse 85 and shallow. BP; 120 over 70. Sammy Hagar: Total Asshole.
            10) Unfortunately, he can't save you without Eddie at his side.

            Don't flame me people, just thought you could use a laugh.

            Cheers,

            Nigel
            LOL!!!! CLASSIC!
            Pope of The Church Of Almighty Sam, Rock God and LEADER of Van Halen!!!

            Comment

            • DLR_EngineRoom
              Veteran
              • Jan 2004
              • 2304

              #7
              Originally posted by DavidLeeWrath

              TOP 10 WAYS FOR NIGEL TO KNOW THAT SAMMY HAGAR IS BLOWING HIM

              1) He mutters something about being out of sperm and passes me to EVH.
              2) You feel a crushing pain in your chest; from the sheer volume of his fat ass as I'm face-sitting backstage.
              3) Halfway thru CPR, he finishes up by blasting my face while singing "Cum on baby, lemme finish what I started here".
              4) He keeps twirling, straddling and flossing his crotch with your 1/2 inch erection.
              5) Diagnosis: sprained ankle, Treatment, foot job.
              6) Words appear stating "Right Now, it's your turn to be screwed by Sammy Hagar"
              7) Leans over and whispers that while he values the Gay Male prostitute business, the industry has blown more men while he's been on tour.
              8) That blood curdling Yoko Ono influenced scream wasn't an orgasmic moan, it was Sammy singing you a love song from OU812.
              9) For quick relief of burning hemmerhoids, try "Preparation Hagaroids".
              10) Unfortunately, he can't save you until you buy a bottle of Cabo Wabo Tequila.

              Don't flame me people, I'm already a backstage flamer for the VH 2004 tour.

              Jeers,

              Nigel The Fat Faggot F***er

              LOL!!!! CLASSIC!

              Thanx!
              http://i162.photobucket.com/albums/t.../EddieDave.jpg
              http://i162.photobucket.com/albums/t...ve_ed_2007.jpg
              http://i162.photobucket.com/albums/t...os/TORCH_B.gif

              Comment

              • Nigel

                #8
                DLR Engine Room, I actually live in Toronto, and I want to meet you somewhere so I can KICK youir FUCKING head of your shoulders.

                Most people get that this is "tongue-in cheek" light humour that brings to bear Dave's "personality". I am not a Van Hagar Sheep, cuntface, I'm a Dave-or the grave guy,

                Why don't you send me a personal message so we can find out WHO THE FAGGOT really is.

                Comment

                • tjvhou812
                  Full Member Status

                  • Mar 2004
                  • 4214

                  #9
                  he wont do that, he's a bitch
                  Originally posted by RIKK

                  Now, tj was indeed a major cunt. Indeed, he probably still is.

                  Comment

                  • Matt White
                    • Jun 2004
                    • 20446

                    #10
                    Come on fellas, settle DOWN!!! We're all waring DOCKERS!!!


                    DAVE OR THE GRAVE BABY!!!

                    Comment

                    • Diver Down NJ
                      Head Fluffer
                      • Jun 2004
                      • 282

                      #11
                      Re: Signs You're Being Rescued by DLR

                      Originally posted by Nigel
                      1) He mutters something about being out of Demerol and offers a swig of JD.
                      2) You feel a crushing pain in your chest; from the sheer volume of his ego.
                      3) Halfway thru CPR, Sammy Hagar steps in to finish up.
                      4) He keeps twirling, straddling and flossing his crotch with your IV stand.
                      5) Diagnosis: sprained ankle, Treatment, Medical marijuana for him.
                      6) Oh-Oh-Oh, Jamie's Dyin'.
                      7) Leans over and whispers that while he values his ambulance partners skill's, he's pretty sure he's more successful on his own.
                      8) No CPR needed. That blood curdling scream brought you back to consciousness all by itself.
                      9) Pulse 85 and shallow. BP; 120 over 70. Sammy Hagar: Total Asshole.
                      10) Unfortunately, he can't save you without Eddie at his side.

                      Don't flame me people, just thought you could use a laugh.

                      Cheers,

                      Nigel

                      Comment

                      • Antman
                        Commando
                        • Jan 2004
                        • 1261

                        #12
                        That was pretty funny. Letterman should get a copy.
                        When the shit hits the fan, close your mouth and duck.

                        Comment

                        • smaz
                          Commando
                          • Mar 2004
                          • 1441

                          #13
                          Originally posted by DLR_EngineRoom
                          10) Unfortunately, he can't save you until you buy a bottle of Cabo Wabo Tequila.
                          BWAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
                          Moving webhosts & will be making changes to the picture hosting - watch this space..

                          Comment

                          • TwoFoolsAMinute
                            Sniper
                            • Apr 2004
                            • 925

                            #14
                            I just had to print the post out so I could take a shit on it. It was that goddam bad.

                            Comment

                            • scorpioboy33
                              Commando
                              • Jul 2004
                              • 1415

                              #15
                              Originally posted by Nigel
                              DLR Engine Room, I actually live in Toronto, and I want to meet you somewhere so I can KICK youir FUCKING head of your shoulders.

                              Most people get that this is "tongue-in cheek" light humour that brings to bear Dave's "personality". I am not a Van Hagar Sheep, cuntface, I'm a Dave-or the grave guy,

                              Why don't you send me a personal message so we can find out WHO THE FAGGOT really is.
                              dude you gonna go to the orilla show?

                              Comment

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