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Thread: Women Drivers

  1. #1
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    Women Drivers

    I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in
    front of a pickup truck, causing him to have to drive on to the shoulder to
    avoid hitting her.

    This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window
    and "flipped" the woman off.

    "Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself.

    I always smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does
    anything to me in traffic, and here's why:

    I drive 48 miles each way every day to work.

    That's 96 miles each day.

    Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper.

    Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway.

    There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles.

    That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.

    Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper-to-bumper,

    I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars.

    That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day.

    Statistically, females drive half of these.

    That's 18,000 women drivers!

    In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has P.M.S.

    That's 642.

    According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or
    unrewarding.

    That's 449.

    According to the National Institutes of Health, 22% of all females have
    seriously considered suicide or homicide.

    That's 98.

    And 34% describe men as their biggest problem.

    That's 33.

    According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry
    weapons, and this number is increasing. That means that Every Single Day, I
    drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are
    her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has
    P.M.S., and is armed.

    Flip one off?

    ....... I think not

  2. #2
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    LOL.

    DLR7884
    That's going around the office as we speak!
    Originally Posted by WARF:
    DLR7884 - This guy is one bad ass sonafabitch... I've seen him destroy peoples posting careers in a single sentence.

  3. #3
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    Re: Women Drivers

    Originally posted by Cathedral

    Flip one off?

    ....... I think not
    good thinking
    TLC
    You KNOW I got the blues.
    Can you dig it?
    Welcome to Massachusetts. Now get the FUCK out of my way!

  4. #4
    SHEEP PEN Yahweh
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    Originally posted by Cathedral
    I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in
    front of a pickup truck, causing him to have to drive on to the shoulder to
    avoid hitting her.

    This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window
    and "flipped" the woman off.

    "Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself.

    I always smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does
    anything to me in traffic, and here's why:

    I drive 48 miles each way every day to work.

    That's 96 miles each day.

    Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper.

    Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway.

    There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles.

    That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.

    Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper-to-bumper,

    I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars.

    That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day.

    Statistically, females drive half of these.

    That's 18,000 women drivers!

    In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has P.M.S.

    That's 642.

    According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or
    unrewarding.

    That's 449.

    According to the National Institutes of Health, 22% of all females have
    seriously considered suicide or homicide.

    That's 98.

    And 34% describe men as their biggest problem.

    That's 33.

    According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry
    weapons, and this number is increasing. That means that Every Single Day, I
    drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are
    her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has
    P.M.S., and is armed.

    Flip one off?

    ....... I think not
    i assume you were sitting in traffic when you did all this math?

  5. #5
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    HAHAHAHAHAAA....thats good thinking Cat...I usually use all five fingers and blow kisses to women on the road, which causes me to vere off the highway many times and get flipped off by other men. Do you have any statistics on this??

    ..or I spend much of my drive time on the phone with a particular women, who also has the ability to make me lose my train of thought, whereas, I think about things involving this particular women that have little or nothing to do with the conversation at hand. I learned just last night that Interstate 81 has grooved pavement on its edges when you get close to the guardrail....they make a VERY LOUD sound when you run over them....
    Last edited by Carmine; 02-17-2005 at 03:26 PM.

  6. #6
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    Road Rage was started by a woman, I mean in the sense that she ran down the offender, then ran her off the road killing her and her unborn child.

    It was a cat fight on wheels.

    As for men, 3 out of 10 men will push an incident to physical violence.

    The fact that i have insurance means it ain't worth it to creat a war over a mishap.
    I drive offensively as well as defensively and rarely try to avoid accidents. If i'm gonna get hit i'm gonna get hit, period.

    people have died trying to avoid hitting one thing only to hit something much worse, sometimes resulting in the drivers death.

    Swerve to miss a deer and hit another car head on, ain't very smart.

    Wear a seatbelt, it will save your life.

  7. #7
    um...yeah
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    I usually just fly above all that.

  8. #8
    lms2
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    Good thinking Cathedral...

  9. #9
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    Originally posted by lms2


    Good thinking Cathedral...
    Shut up, pathetic ass-kisser. You offer nothing to any thread.
    Roth Army Militia

    Originally posted by WARF
    Rikk - The new school of the Roth Army... this dude leads the pack... three words... The Sheep Pen... this dude opened alot of doors for people during this new era... he's the best of the new school.

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