because...
1. it looks like a woman.
because...
1. it looks like a woman.
Don't notice most of my posts are less than 2 lines...
Fender Custom Shop Owners Club
Gibson Custom Shop Owners Club
Cato's YouTube Channel
What sort of women do you hang around with Cato?
Ones you plug in?
2. They only speak when you want them to.
Women are like guitars. Love to be fingered, made to be played and if there Korean their cheaply made.
3. Because they can help you express yourself when words don't do the job.
"Honey, my shirt got itself torn up. My shirt tore itself on that stripper's hand, and I need it to be sewed up for the show."
"No problem, Dave, no problem. Say hello to Fluffy."
"Fuck you, Fluffy."
"No, no, you're going to upset Fluffy."
"I ain't saying hello to no stuffed bear."
"You know, now that I think about it, it's going to take a little longer to sew up that shirt than I was thinking."
"Hi Fluffy, how you been?"
"Now that I'm thinking of it even more, it's going to take half the time, Double D, Diamond Dave! Would you hold Fluffy?"
"N--- yeah."
4. Their headstocks fit those forehead indentations they made YEARS after they form them.
5. You can turn them down when you've had enough of them yaking!
6. They only feedback when you let 'em.
Guitars like to be fingered all the time.
I only can count to six!
Because it's a chick magnet.
11. You can use them to kill people and opposing animals who compete with you for food shelter and survival.
12. A guitar doesn't get jealous when you play with another guitar.
If I want any shit out of you, I'll squeeze your head.
i dont think so. they are very jealous....Originally posted by alexpgrimes
12. A guitar doesn't get jealous when you play with another guitar.
They serve as a phallic symbol to make you feel better about your tiny yellow tinkler.
14. Much easier to write songs on than drums.
Playing keeps me sane...
16. "I love the smell of nitrocellulose lacquer in the morning.."
17. 'Eruption' just doesn't sound the same on mandolin.
18. You don't have to wear a condom to fuck around with a guitar. They don't produce little baby guitars but they do give you G.A.S (Gear Acquisition Syndrom)!!!
"If you want to be a monk... you gotta cook a lot of rice...”
19. Each has their very own 'soul'.
20. No matter how long you neglect it, it always takes you back.
21. They look just as good as pinups in magazines
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Did I ever hurt you in any way? If I did, then hear my apology: FUCK YOU!
22. You can make them look or work better without them complaining....
You can't cut off the neck of a woman without them complaining....
ROTH ARMY YOUTUBE CHANNEL:
http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=RothArmyVideos
"May your shit come to life and kiss you on the face." - Frank Zappa to Tipper Gore
23. You can have more than one without the other getting jealous
Roth Army Militia
Nobody ever got laid because they played the accordian well.
No! You can't have the keys to the wine cellar!
Ive never tried to 69 with my guitar, whats it like, CATO ??
BABY PANA 2 IS Coming !! All across the land, let the love and beer flow !
Love ya Mary Frances!
They help me to act like I'm 18 years old. Instead of getting pissed off about it.
It's a shame that families should be torn apart by something as simple as....wild dogs
They make good investments if you get the right vintage guitar...
I don't know about CATO but I cut my dick on the sharp string ends sticking out of the tuners and caught my toungue in the trem. 69ing a guitar you love is more dangerouse than an AIDS infested Somolian whore.Originally posted by Panamark
Ive never tried to 69 with my guitar, whats it like, CATO ??
I'm betting Zamfir's not getting much action, either...Originally posted by Nitro Express
Nobody ever got laid because they played the accordian well.
Ouch ! You might want to try a bit of back body lovin next time Nitro !Originally posted by Nitro Express
I don't know about CATO but I cut my dick on the sharp string ends sticking out of the tuners and caught my toungue in the trem. 69ing a guitar you love is more dangerouse than an AIDS infested Somolian whore.
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