Why is a deer herd so wealthy? Because it's nothing but doe and bucks!
FOX-FM in Sydney, Australia has a game where a DJ phones a couple, asks them three questions, and, if their answers agree, gives them a nice vacation. But one particular exchange stands out: DJ: "Hey! This is FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match?'" Contestant (laughing): "Yes, I have." DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast. What's your name? First name only, please." Contestant: "Brian." DJ: "Brian, are you married?" Brian (laughing nervously): "Yes." DJ: "What's your wife's name? First only, please." Brian: "Sarah." DJ: "Is Sarah at work, Brian?" Brian: "She's gonna kill me." DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian. Is she at work?" Brian (laughing): "Yes, she's at work." DJ: "Okay, first question: When was the last time you had sex?" Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning." DJ: "Attaboy, Brian." Brian laughs sheepishly. DJ: "Second question: How long did it last?" Brian: "About 10 minutes." DJ: "Wow! You really want to win that trip! No one would admit that without a trip at stake." Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice." DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex this morning?" Brian (laughing hard): "I, um, err, well…" DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where?" Brian: "Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us for a couple of weeks." DJ: "Uh huh." Brian: "And the mother-in-law was in the shower at the time." DJ: "Atta boy, Brian." Brian: "On the kitchen table." DJ: "Not that great? This is better than the previous hundred times I've done this! Okay, folks, I'm going to put Brian on hold, get Sarah's number and call her while you listen to this." [Three minutes of commercials.] DJ: "Okay, audience, let's call Sarah, shall we?" (Touch tones, ringing.) Voice: "Kinko's." DJ: "Is Sarah around there somewhere?" Voice: "This is she." DJ: "Sarah, this is FOX-FM. We're live on the air right now and I've been talking with Brian, who's on the line with us. Brian knows not to give away any answers or you'll lose. So, do you know the rules of 'Mate Match?'" Sarah: "No." DJ: "Good!" Brian laughs. Sarah (laughing): "Brian, what in the hell are you up to now?" Brian (laughing): "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest." DJ: "Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. Now, I will ask you three questions, Sarah. If your answers match Brian's answers, then the two of you will be off to the Gold Coast on us. Sarah (laughing): "Yes." DJ: "All right. When did you last have sex, Sarah?" Sarah: "Oh, God, Brian! Uh, this morning before Brian went to work." DJ: "What time?" Sarah: "Around 8?" DJ: "Very good. Second question: How long did it last?" Sarah: "12, 15 minutes, maybe." DJ: "Hmm. Close enough. She's just trying to protect his manhood. One last question, Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?" Sarah (laughing): "Yes." DJ: "Where did you have it?" Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that, did you?" Brian: "Just tell him the truth, honey." DJ: "What is bothering you so much, Sarah?" Sarah: "Well…" DJ: "Come on, Sarah. Where did you have it?" Sarah: "Up the arse…" After what seemed like a minute of dead air, the DJ spluttered, "Folks, we'll be right back after this station break!"
Cheers! :bottle: