The World's STUPIDEST Lyrics

[academic punk]

Could somebody tell me what the fuck is "Someone left the cake out in the rain" ("MacArthur Park") all about???

Here's the thread for us to post what we consider some of the world's crappest, most nonsensical lyrics. Here's another good example:

"If there's a bustle in your hedgerow
Don't be alarmed now
It's just a spring-clean for thr May Queen"

uh....riiiiiiiiight...

But here's the rules: they can't be CONSCIOUSLY stupid lyrics. These have to be examples of the lyricists ineptitude, or thinking that they're "really writing something deeeep, man", or just a bad stretch at a rhyme scheme...

of course the obligatory "Only time will tell if we stand the test of time" does not even need mentioning.

Even though I just did...

[academic punk]

Christ! They're even worse than I realised!

Spring was never waiting for us, girl
It ran one step ahead
As we followed in the dance
Between the parted pages and were pressed
In love's hot, fevered iron
Like a striped pair of pants (WTF???)

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet, green icing flowing down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'Cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, no!

I recall the yellow cotton dress
Foaming like a wave
On the ground around your knees
The birds, like tender babies in your hands
And the old men playing checkers by the trees

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet, green icing flowing down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'Cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, no!

[break]

There will be another song for me
For I will sing it
There will be another dream for me
Someone will bring it
I will drink the wine while it is warm
And never let you catch me looking at the sun
And after all the loves of my life
After all the loves of my life
You'll still be the one

I will take my life into my hands and I will use it
I will win the worship in their eyes and I will lose it
I will have the things that I desire
And my passion flow like rivers through the sky
And after all the loves of my life
After all the loves of my life
I'll be thinking of you
And wondering why

[extended break]

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet, green icing flowing down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'Cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, no!
Oh, no
No, no
Oh no!!

[The Scatologist]

Up For Breakfast?

Hell any Van Hagar really.....

[Dave's Bitch]

only time will tell if we stand the test of time

[Big Fat Sammy]

"If there's a bustle in your hedgerow
Don't be alarmed now
It's just a spring-clean for thr May Queen"


That makes sense when you realize what "Stairway To Heaven" is actually about.

I heard that Robert Plant is singing to a young girl, comforting her as she is concerned about getting her first period.

Thats what I heard anyway...

[canadiandlrgirl]

Originally posted by The Scatologist
Up For Breakfast?

Hell any Van Hagar really.....

you beat me to it... you FUCKER

[Matt White]

Originally posted by Big Fat Sammy
"If there's a bustle in your hedgerow
Don't be alarmed now
It's just a spring-clean for thr May Queen"


That makes sense when you realize what "Stairway To Heaven" is actually about.

I heard that Robert Plant is singing to a young girl, comforting her as she is concerned about getting her first period.

Thats what I heard anyway...

LOL I think it's a little bit deeper than that BFS!!!

The "May Queen"? Look up some British Lit!

It might seem obscure, but dig a little deeper.....and realize PLANT was STONED to the BONE when he wrote it.

[Ally_Kat]

random definition: The May Queen is a girl (usually a teenage girl from a specific school year) who is selected to ride at the front of a parade for May Day celebrations. She wears a gown and usually a tiara or crown. Her duty is to begin the May Day celebrations.

[Mr Badguy]

"Read my body" by Kiss from `89s "Hot in the shade".

I won`t bore you with them all but the chorus (which rips off "Pour dome sugar on me") goes:

Read my body
Are the letters big enough
Read my body
Do you like the book of my love
Read my body
Turn the page, get to the good stuff

On and on it goes until the fade when Paul Stanley, obviously about to cream himself, bawls over the chorus:

EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT!

The stupidest cornball shit ever.

[blueturk]

"Don't Let Him Go" by REO Speedwagon. This is a guy singing this shit! If Kevin Cronin qualifies as a male, that is...

So you figure that you've got him all figured out
He's a sweet talkin stud
Who can melt a girl's heart with his pout
He's the kind of lover that the ladies dream about

He's got plenty of cash
He's got plenty of friends
He drives women wild
Then he drives off in a mercedes-benz
He's got a long wick with a flame at both ends
He's hot

But don't let him go
Just give him a chance to grow
Take it easy, take it slow
And don't let him go

He makes you so angry
He makes you so sore
The weight may be worth it
But how can you wait anymore
When you're wonderin what you're waitin for
Baby I don't know

[monkeythe]

"I'm hot
sticky sweet
from my head
to my feet"
- Def Leppard

Is this song about Joe Elliot's sweaty feet?

[Panamark]

I love those lyrics from Stairway.. Am I the only one that actually
sees meaning in them ??

That whole verse to me is saying if you notice shit going down, dont
worry too much. In the grander scheme you can always make it good..

(Actually my interpretation is a lot deeper than that, but thats the
condensed version)

Ive got a good example, "Blinded by the light" written by Springsteen
and performed by Manfred Mann

Blinded by the light
Wrapped up like a douche
another runner in the night ??
or some crap...

[academic punk]

Originally posted by Panamark
I love those lyrics from Stairway.. Am I the only one that actually
sees meaning in them ??

That whole verse to me is saying if you notice shit going down, dont
worry too much. In the grander scheme you can always make it good..

(Actually my interpretation is a lot deeper than that, but thats the
condensed version)

That actually DOES sound legit, but since so did the menstruation hypothesis, I'm still in the camp that Plant was stoned off his gourd when he wrote it, and was convinced that he was "really writing some deep shit here, maaaaan".

Originally posted by Panamark


Ive got a good example, "Blinded by the light" written by Springsteen
and performed by Manfred Mann

Blinded by the light
Wrapped up like a douche
another runner in the night ??
or some crap...

Actually, Bruce's original version the lyric was "Cut loose like a Deuce": as in Deuce Coupe, as in tearing down the highway in your car. Somehow or other Manfred Mann changed this to "douche". Springsteen recently commented on his feelings towards the alteration:

"My version, I was talking about a car, like in a Beach Boys song. Thier version, for some reason they were talking about a feminine hygiene product, like in a Tampax commercial. My version went nowhere. Their version went to #1. The public has spoken."

[academic punk]

...I just realized the theme of my last post had a them regarding menstruation.

At last, I've found the common link between "Stairway to Heaven" and "Blinded by the Light". Who'd've thunk it?

And so since we ARE on this theme, allow me to cite a very GOOD menstruation reference:

"And I'm trying to make some girl
But she tells me, Baby, ya better come back
Maybe next week
'Cause you see, I'm on a losing streak"

- Jagger/Richards "Satisfaction"

[FORD]

We all know the REAL meaning of "Stairway to Heaven" can only be heard backwards.