Only The Bravest Guys Enter The Terrifying...
Herd of leggy lezzies try to trample male students in latest college craze
By G.A. GUNN
DANGEROUS new sport, inspired by the running of the bulls in Pamplona, Spain, is taking college campuses across the U.S. by storm.
Worried officials say the Running of the Bull Dykes has already caused several serious injuries. "And now we're waiting for the first death to happen," says one distraught campus administrator.
Young male students say they get an adrenaline rush when they run from a stampeding herd of stocky, short-haired, mannish lesbians that are whipped into a snorting, bellowing frenzy by alcohol and the liberal use of cattle prods.
"When they get loose, you totally have to run for your life, man," says one 20- year-old medical student at a Midwest college. "My advice is to stay sober and hug the corners, otherwise you'll get caught and stomped into a pulp."
In Pamplona, the running of the bulls is the most important event during the Fiesta of San Fermin, when young men run in front of the crazed cattle and lead them from their pen to a bullring. Often dozens of runners are injured, some of them seriously.
"That was the inspiration for the Running of the Bull Dykes," the student explained. "The dykes are all volunteers who travel from all over the country to enter the event.
"Sometimes as many as 600 are penned up at the start of a twisting, half-mile course through a local park. Barriers are erected so the runners can't bail out, and the run ends at another holding pen at the finish line.
"The dykes get plenty of free drink and are worked into a rage by cattle prods. Sometimes students also pretend to have sex with the dykes' 'lipstick lesbian' girlfriends, and this gets them red-eyed with fury and ready to charge."
A typical dyke run begins at six in the morning, and a rocket goes off at the moment the bull dykes are released.
"The runners have a 50 yard start on us and they're fast," says one dyke who identified herself only as Hank. "But we usually catch three or four who trip or crash into a barrier and pound them into the dirt. It's fun."
Not so, say cops.
"A 200-pound, infuriated bull dyke is nothing to mess with," says one officer. "A man can get seriously hurt if he's trampled by the herd during the run."
Organizers point out that runners are warned not to take part in the festivities if they are drunk or high. "The potential for real serious injury is too great," they say.
But critics maintain beer plays a big part in the run, and most of the participants are at least buzzed when the starting rocket flares into the sky.
Angry feminist groups are urging the authorities to clamp down on dyke running, calling the events, "a blatant example of the exploitation of women."
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