FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
March 3, 2006
THE ROTH ARMY ORIGINAL: A HitchRANT: Roth Radio--To BE or Not TO BE?
"Will this be THE END of Roth Radio™??? Well, alot of people said that on March 8th. Howard Stern is saying it today, as are many of the rumors circulating. It's all a bunch of DOOM AND GLOOM and let me tell you why it's NOT TRUE."
(A.P.) Hell, Mich. - Roth Army World Headquarters
As posted By hitch1969©:
Team Roth™,
As RothTards® we know that we are in the darkest hour of Roth Radio™. It's going to have the longevity of a 1996 Van Halen Reunion, but I think we all knew that from the beginning. All good things Roth happen at this pace - a quick flash of brilliance, then gone. The rest of our times are spent in between these magnificent supernovas, pondering all that we had so briefly but have now lost... until the next adventure.
Well the only adventures that I regret are the ones I missed, and the thought of all the pretty girls I never tried to kiss. Turn on your TV, your stereo... honey, RUN TELL EVERYONE that Diamond David Lee Roth IS ON THE RADIO!!!
If I ever can convince Alberto to get me ON AIR with Diamond Dave before it's all over, you'll know it was me because that is what I am going to say when DLR takes my call. Alberto was good to me though, had me on hold a few times waiting with some very off topic stuff (this was the days before the freeform mind you). Alberto I still want the mash-ups, my man. Al-B3 you are the gateway of Roth Radio and I loves ya. I digress.
Ok... Friday. April Fools 2006. or was it 1985? Ok, I guess it's only the friggin 31st but still look at how these things happen in cycles. Will this be THE END of Roth Radio™??? Well, alot of people said that on March 8th. Howard Stern is saying it today, as are many of the rumors circulating. It's all a bunch of DOOM AND GLOOM and let me tell you why it's NOT TRUE.
Roth Radio isn't over this week. Don't get me wrong, it won't be here SAME TIME NEXT YEAR... but really think about this. There is a pretty good chance Diamond Dave will be back not only Friday but also Monday. I am going to tell you why.
First of all, there is something that we don't know going on here. Well, just what happened in Miami??? Was Dave suspended, fired? In piecing together the puzzle, it's pretty simple - the TRUTH is out there, in it's varied sources and forms. David Lee went, by his own estimation on Tuesday's show... 48 hours without sleep. It was a NON STOP party and I sure Dave's first 2 days were fueled completely by cocaine and red bull™.
“Contrary to erroneous reports, David Lee Roth has not been let go. He is on his way back from Miami and is scheduled to return to the air on Friday,” a CBS spokeswoman said in an e-mail to the Herald.
Roth reportedly attended the Winter Music Conference, and “the rumblings emanating from South Beach claimed Roth didn’t get any sleep Monday night and needed some time off,” according to R&R pop music editor Kevin Carter.
So was it so much temptation that made Dave screw up his first major day to day gig of his life?
Honestly, these are the antics that I would expect from myself from time to time, hoping that the occasional brown bag flu® is not entirely scrutinized and simply dismissed. But then again, I don't have MILLIONS OF PEOPLE waiting for me in the morning. Besides... knowing about Dave and his Ken-Do™ discipline (he's a lifer) it is obvious that this explanation is too simple for what has happened. Dave is disciplined in everything that he does. We know this.
So what is going on here? WHAT HAPPENED IN MIAMI??? Chiusano greenlit and paid for the excursion. There were technical issues on the first day... and honestly, the last 1/2 of Tuesday's show sounds so distorted and shitty ALL AROUND. Dave repeating things a little more than usual... not being able to say the 800 number, etc etc, come on, history tells us that at times he was so drunk he forgot the effing words.
Having said all this... David Lee is a very shrewd business man. And I think that's the thing we don't know about here, the gray area that hasn't been reported or rumored. It's his contract, and I'd be willing to bet that somewhere in there, there is some sort of odd allowance to take 2 days off for whatever reason without notice.
These CBS guys hate him, hate dealing with him... WHY HAVENT THEY FIRED HIM? Why didn't they do this on March 8th? March 9th? yesterday?? today??? "Dave will return Friday?" What, so you can FIRE HIM then?
No WAY. Doesn't make sense... Dave's GOT something on CBS, and if Roth's "participation" in the videos for "Me Wise Magic" and "Can't Get This Stuff No More" tell us that... I think if he had even an INKLING that they were going to make Friday be his last show... as I read at the time regarding those videos, someone put it as "he knew that he owned the ball and decided to take his ball and go home" if they didnt want to play by his rules.
So is Dave even going to show up Friday? What are the chances??
If he does show up, what will he say... and more importantly what are the chances that whatever he says WILL EVER make it to podcast?
Sounds like someone is building suspense. Creating the "air of mystery" as we call it at hitchWORLD... STAY TUNED, as our old hitchWORLD catchphrase goes.
Let's say that Dave does the show. Now, having bragged that he would be in Miami all week, and then NOT being at work for 2 days and THEN doing the last show if the week from New York.... HOW is Dave going to explain this? Roth isn't the first person that I think of on the "I'm sorry, I screwed up" humility scale. Nope, he's a classic BLAMER and I love the guy for it! Old Dave is going to do the finger pointing and LOOK OUT for all the embarassment it has caused him!
Why hasnt he gone to Howard 100 news yet? like last time? Going on about RACIST CBS (that move was brilliant by the way) trying to muscle him?
Ok here is the CALL TO ACTION part of the speech. I have posed MANY questions, outlined some varied lines of reasoning and a general concensus of what is happening, could happen, probably will happen, etc. etc. etc. Agree or disagree?
I am going to miss that one, I must say. This is the most exciting time in Roth Radio™ We Rothtards need to cherish this, EMBRACE this suspense and MAKE IT OUR OURS like we did with Classic Van Halen in our youth. Cuz it's ain't gonna last MUCH longer, and then YOU CANT GET THIS STUFF NO MORE.
Dave's the master of that shit. Anyway... someone in one of those markets BEST be taping at 5:59 am precisely and we all must pay attention to these great, yet turbulent times of Roth Radio. Really, was another Monday of Elizabeth Hayt really going to keep the show afloat? INNERviews with Uncle Manny?
Oddly enough, it was the moments that most people hated that I actually loved.
hitchWORLD's money is on IT'S NOT OVER THIS WEEK but won't last too many more... and the GOOD STUFF® is on it's way!
so keep your EYES TO THE SKIES, RothTards.
=WHO LOVES YA BABY?=
-hitch
Reply With Quote
I'm Sasha..the intern
