HI, my name is Gary.
My last name is not Cherone, yet like him, I am a big fan of VH3. Just kidding.
Let me start over here.. HI, I'm Gary and my fan-mission-statement shall be my headstone: DAVE OR THE GRAVE, bashing Sammy fans on AOL chatrooms on churned "free trial" accounts since '92
I collect aluminum cans and bottlecap, mehhehehehe!
I used to sleep in my van, down by the river not knowing where my next meal came from nor giving a shit.
Now I live so close to the Pacific Ocean I could hook my next fish for a meal, or even take a shit in it. Or on a Hooker. Sometimes I do both.. shitting on hookers and hooking turdfish in the sea. J/k But not in the same place, no no no. And I like paid-for romantic dinners and long walks on the beach, holding handcuffs and other fantastic crap unreal and imagined the minute it pops in my little head.
My hobbies include yelling at my woman, and playing the radio. Someday I'd like to try guitar because I like music, and think it would be neato to read shet music one day to perform a butt trumpet recital for others. Or disrobe others to perform. Either way I think I may have talent but for Right Here and Now I'd like a ham sandwich.
In my mind I live in California, but when I pull out of my driveway I realize I'm in the middle of Mexico and sometimes do not swerve to avoid hitting those pudgey little illegals on bicycles because - what's the point? Sometimes I say hello to them on the freeway with a handfull of pennies when they fuck up traffic on the 10 doing 50mph with their beater Datsuns as I pass. Because I'm social like that or so my parole officer used to tell me.
For Christmas, I hunted Santa up in the Arctic winds and really came close. For my efforts I got many lumps of coal, and I am gonna pop that fat bastard like a balloon if I ever catch him.
I do not believe in organized religion, but have faith in God's plan for destroying everything because that just means he likes what Obama likes - ambiguous Hope and Change - and guess what folks he's gonna be our new President if he's not shot so deal with it you haters!
On politics: I wished God would come down here and run for President like I invited him to, but the new half-Negro president-elect purports to know everything God doesn't and because politics only respect what you say you'll do (not what you actually get done) well I guess that's gonna have to be good enough.
Street Cred: I have two cars that run, and about seven others I've planted out in the front yard that come harvest time, I hope to have yielded another 5 from this crop.
Well I gotta run now, the tow truck's here. Props to Sarge for giving a shit one last time, and here's hoping we can really light that Reunion Torch with a new VH disk with all orgeanal mammbers.
BASTE,
GAR!!
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Originally Posted by GAR
