Results 1 to 28 of 28

Thread: Hello sons and daughters of Creation!

  1. #1
    Sucker of Satan's Penis
    Guest

    Hello sons and daughters of Creation!

    Hello Roth Army -

    It is I, Allah. And to me you may say "aleikum" which means "fuckin' aye hello" in the language of those who invented me - Arabic!

    I am aware this board is about David Lee Roth, one of many People of the Book which my followers have chased out of the Fertile Crescent for two thousand years, same as many of you with similar heritage.

    However, I have chosen this site as the new mouthpiece for what kinda closure we can get done in whatever amount of time we have left - before I destroy the planet in 2012 by crashing Planet Nibiru thru it.. you know, I gotta do what I gotta do but I don't want you guys going out of existence without us patching things up a bit.

    True, many of you European Peoples had your wells poisoned by my True Believers, and you still did not convert to honoring me. We burned your fields and still you did not honor me. Wrecked your pens, stole livestock, torched your towns and all you guys could do was move further and further north.

    Good for you. Now that all I got left here in the Middle East is a buncha fuckin' chicken-stealing, psychopathic pyromaniacs I'm kinda in the market for new recruits who are a tad more interesting. So I hope we can patch things up and bring you folks back to the Crossroads of Civilization and build it up a bit.

    Not like how I unbuilt New York, but how you guys did like that, we need to get stuff going on over ----> here.

    So to begin, I'm saying "sorry for all the jihad schtick, didn't mean it, just kidding about poisoning all the wells from Ankara to Bulgaria up thru the Caucasus Steppes chasin' you fuckers it was just a gag" and stuff. We're cool so come on back - but without that stealth bomber shit...

    Oh and my favorite Son of David Roth cut is "Dead or Alive" from Van Halen 2.

    I be poppin in and outta this here beiouyatch onced in awhile, so this just a brief hello for now. Why not tell me about yourself? Not that I care, unless you're an infidel.. okay LOL just kiddin, more schtick okay dont get bent..
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  2. #2
    IN ROTH WE TRUST
    Commando
    Sarge's Little Helper's Avatar
    Member No
    7
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Last Online
    03-08-2003 @ 08:08 AM
    Location
    CYBER WORLD
    Age
    52
    Posts
    1,267
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 35 Times in 32 Posts


    Rep Power
    24
    Hi Allah! It is my pleasure to be the first JACKASS to welcome you to The Diamond David Lee Roth Army! IN ROTH WE TRUST.
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  3. #3
    Sucker of Satan's Penis
    Guest
    You did not have permission to address Allah.

    Allah leaves you one Groan for being an unclean DIQHEAD

  4. #4
    formerly F A T
    King Of Smut
    ROTH ARMY WEBMASTER

    twonabomber's Avatar
    Member No
    28
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    Today @ 02:18 PM
    Location
    Cleveland, Ohio
    Age
    55
    Posts
    11,191
    Status
    Online
    Thanks
    223
    Thanked 2,504 Times in 1,615 Posts


    Rep Power
    10
    i would be very surprised if this wasn't who i think it is.
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  5. #5
    Banned
    Member No
    24640
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Last Online
    08-24-2009 @ 10:27 PM
    Location
    hawaii
    Posts
    689
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    43
    Thanked 32 Times in 26 Posts


    Rep Power
    0
    Certainly more entertaining than the Christ/Satan schtick. Word nigga.


    I thought you were Elvis but it's clear now that you're not.
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  6. #6
    Fuck this and fuck that
    ROTH ARMY MODERATOR

    FORD's Avatar
    Member No
    32
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    Today @ 12:17 PM
    Location
    Cascadia
    Posts
    58,671
    Status
    Online
    Thanks
    3,391
    Thanked 6,281 Times in 4,711 Posts


    Rep Power
    143
    Quote Originally Posted by Dolemite! View Post
    Certainly more entertaining than the Christ/Satan schtick. Word nigga.


    I thought you were Elvis but it's clear now that you're not.
    So when are you gonna pull out a "Shiva" alias, pedobear?

    You could molest two boys at the same time and still have arms to type with.
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  7. 2 users say thank you to FORD for this KICKASS post:

    hideyoursheep (08-05-2009),Seshmeister (08-05-2009)


  8. #7
    Banned
    Member No
    24640
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Last Online
    08-24-2009 @ 10:27 PM
    Location
    hawaii
    Posts
    689
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    43
    Thanked 32 Times in 26 Posts


    Rep Power
    0
    The religious alts is your thing as is a tendency to watch the first two Home Alone movies on repeat.

  9. Thanked Dolemite! for this KICKASS post:



  10. #8
    Banned
    Member No
    5226
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Last Online
    06-13-2016 @ 10:02 PM
    Location
    .
    Posts
    12,707
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    1,428
    Thanked 1,438 Times in 1,119 Posts


    Rep Power
    0
    Oh, not another one. Jaysus.

    Listen, or read, whatever: whenever the thought crosses your mind that it will be incredibly funny to create an alias, and you start giggling to yourself about the brilliant idea you just had, TURN OFF YOUR COMPUTER AND GO TO SLEEP!

    It's not funny. Never was.

    Gawd.

    Retards.

    Cheers! :bottle:
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  11. 3 users say thank you to Anonymous for this KICKASS post:

    Coyote (08-04-2009),GAR (08-05-2009),standin (08-04-2009)


  12. #9
    Loon
    SUPER MODERATOR

    Nickdfresh's Avatar
    Member No
    8719
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Last Online
    Today @ 07:40 AM
    Location
    Buffalo, NY
    Age
    53
    Posts
    49,064
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    3,454
    Thanked 4,562 Times in 3,449 Posts


    Rep Power
    116
    Why would Allah use an avatar of Mohammad with a bomb on his turban? Mohammad is not Allah, and his lifespan predated gunpowder, white trash ignorant asshole...

    Try to actually read a book while in the library instead of cock-blocking kids from the internet terminals, GAR...
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  13. Thanked Nickdfresh for this KICKASS post:

    FORD (08-04-2009)


  14. #10
    Banned
    132dB's At Your Service

    Member No
    25
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    05-21-2013 @ 07:57 PM
    Location
    20' Above Water
    Posts
    10,849
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    2,599
    Thanked 334 Times in 307 Posts


    Blog Entries
    1
    Rep Power
    0
    Hey, don't blame me if we have a guest or two over..
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  15. #11
    ®oth A®my f®an©hise ?laya
    Full Member Status

    Steve Savicki's Avatar
    Member No
    46
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    05-18-2011 @ 11:33 AM
    Location
    definitely NOT Huntsville, Alabama
    Age
    49
    Posts
    3,934
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    554
    Thanked 43 Times in 29 Posts


    Blog Entries
    1
    Rep Power
    0
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  16. #12
    Feeding My Addiction
    DIAMOND STATUS
    binnie's Avatar
    Member No
    20165
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Last Online
    12-27-2016 @ 08:33 AM
    Location
    Here, there, every fucking where
    Age
    42
    Posts
    19,144
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    1,809
    Thanked 1,785 Times in 1,252 Posts


    Rep Power
    56
    STFU Steve.
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  17. Thanked binnie for this KICKASS post:

    Guitar Shark (08-05-2009)


  18. #13
    Gimme head till I'm dead
    ROTH ARMY WEBMASTER

    Igosplut's Avatar
    Member No
    45
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    01-03-2021 @ 04:33 PM
    Location
    Cape Cod Fuckin MA
    Posts
    2,791
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    175
    Thanked 727 Times in 484 Posts


    Rep Power
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by Steve Savicki View Post
    So lemme guess. You dress up in drag as this broad and go to these gatherings?
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  19. #14
    Builder of Sites
    DIAMOND STATUS
    LoungeMachine's Avatar
    Member No
    6584
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Last Online
    02-08-2016 @ 02:28 AM
    Location
    Milan to Minsk
    Posts
    32,555
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    4,111
    Thanked 3,705 Times in 2,513 Posts


    Rep Power
    89
    Quote Originally Posted by Steve Savicki View Post
    RothChats down?

    Or did the other 2 people fall asleep on you again?
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  20. #15
    Banned
    Member No
    5226
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Last Online
    06-13-2016 @ 10:02 PM
    Location
    .
    Posts
    12,707
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    1,428
    Thanked 1,438 Times in 1,119 Posts


    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Steve Savicki View Post
    Is it? I guess we could kill you, just to find out. And then we'd donate your blood, and everybody'd be happy.

    Cheers! :bottle:

  21. Thanked Anonymous for this KICKASS post:



  22. #16
    Professional Smartass
    ROTH ARMY SUPREME
    Guitar Shark's Avatar
    Member No
    307
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    04-05-2021 @ 07:55 PM
    Location
    Hawaii
    Age
    53
    Posts
    7,576
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    1,475
    Thanked 1,578 Times in 878 Posts


    Rep Power
    45

    Wink

    Quote Originally Posted by Imapus_Sylicker View Post
    Is it? I guess we could kill you, just to find out. And then we'd donate your blood, and everybody'd be happy.

    Cheers! :bottle:
    Careful, or Savicki will go crying to Mezro, who will delete your account and all your posts.
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  23. Thanked Guitar Shark for this KICKASS post:

    Diamondjimi (09-14-2009)


  24. #17
    formerly F A T
    King Of Smut
    ROTH ARMY WEBMASTER

    twonabomber's Avatar
    Member No
    28
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    Today @ 02:18 PM
    Location
    Cleveland, Ohio
    Age
    55
    Posts
    11,191
    Status
    Online
    Thanks
    223
    Thanked 2,504 Times in 1,615 Posts


    Rep Power
    10
    so am i right?

  25. #18
    Banned
    Member No
    5226
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Last Online
    06-13-2016 @ 10:02 PM
    Location
    .
    Posts
    12,707
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    1,428
    Thanked 1,438 Times in 1,119 Posts


    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Guitar Shark View Post
    Careful, or Savicki will go crying to Mezro, who will delete your account and all your posts.
    Well, since I started another account, I couldn't care less. How is ole ORZEM, by the way?

    Has he recovered from his mental breakdown yet?...

    Cheers! :bottle:

  26. #19
    Banned
    Member No
    5226
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Last Online
    06-13-2016 @ 10:02 PM
    Location
    .
    Posts
    12,707
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    1,428
    Thanked 1,438 Times in 1,119 Posts


    Rep Power
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by twonabomber View Post
    so am i right?
    About what, old chap? Allah being Gar?

    Well, the choice of nomenclature, the entirely absent humour and the "diqhead" bit gave him away, I believe.

    Not to mention he found it so funny - as only he could, given the already mentioned lack of anything funny or witty on that character/post - he went and told his boyfriend to come here and take a look at his work.

    Thus he was rewarded with a Shitvicky post.

    Cheers! :bottle:
    Last edited by Anonymous; 08-05-2009 at 05:48 PM.

  27. #20
    Professional Smartass
    ROTH ARMY SUPREME
    Guitar Shark's Avatar
    Member No
    307
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    04-05-2021 @ 07:55 PM
    Location
    Hawaii
    Age
    53
    Posts
    7,576
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    1,475
    Thanked 1,578 Times in 878 Posts


    Rep Power
    45
    Quote Originally Posted by twonabomber View Post
    so am i right?
    You are a wise man twona...

  28. #21
    formerly F A T
    King Of Smut
    ROTH ARMY WEBMASTER

    twonabomber's Avatar
    Member No
    28
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    Today @ 02:18 PM
    Location
    Cleveland, Ohio
    Age
    55
    Posts
    11,191
    Status
    Online
    Thanks
    223
    Thanked 2,504 Times in 1,615 Posts


    Rep Power
    10
    i'm not exactly new to this whole intertubes thing...

  29. #22
    roth beer pest
    DIAMOND STATUS
    PETE'S BROTHER's Avatar
    Member No
    22706
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Last Online
    06-02-2022 @ 11:33 PM
    Location
    arizona
    Age
    53
    Posts
    12,682
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    4,273
    Thanked 2,377 Times in 1,853 Posts


    Rep Power
    54
    Quote Originally Posted by LoungeMachine View Post
    RothChats down?

    Or did the other 2 people fall asleep on you again?
    that was good
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  30. #23
    Sucker of Satan's Penis
    Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Nickdfresh View Post
    Why would Allah use an avatar of Mohammad with a bomb on his turban?
    Excuse me for having issues with My Messenger, and though I'd just as soon blow his ass up for laughs as any other Martyr, but so far he's killed more People of the Book than anybody else hands down - so I kinda like him for an avatar bestest.



    (pretty fuckin' good fighter, too.. dontcha think?)

    Quote Originally Posted by Nickdfresh View Post
    Mohammad is not Allah
    Monkey - meet Wrench! Thanks for the obvious edumacations.. we'll leave that up for the others of lesser intellect to glean your genius off like the vulture licks the fallen camel.. (all Praise and glory be under me)



    Quote Originally Posted by Nickdfresh View Post
    ... and his lifespan predated gunpowder
    The sun rises, the sun sets.. directions which migrated also the explosive nitrates from those slanty-eyed Magog over 3 of your millenia hence past. Thus you are incorrect, thus you be silenced!


  31. #24
    Sucker of Satan's Penis
    Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by twonabomber View Post
    i'm not exactly new to this whole intertubes thing...
    Yon hindmost resemblest an intertube, also.

    Repent of the pizza! REPENT of the ales!!!

  32. #25
    ROTH ARMY WEBMASTER

    Seshmeister's Avatar
    Member No
    11
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Last Online
    Today @ 12:43 AM
    Location
    Scotland
    Posts
    35,078
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    2,815
    Thanked 9,347 Times in 6,031 Posts


    Rep Power
    10
    I have to admit a while back I considered doing an Allah alias here but quickly realised it would take a huge amount of work to read up on all the theology behind it and quite frankly I couldn't be bothered wasting the time.

    I see that didn't stop you...
    Hey Jackass! You need to [Register] or log in to view signatures on ROTHARMY.COM!

  33. #26
    Fuck this and fuck that
    ROTH ARMY MODERATOR

    FORD's Avatar
    Member No
    32
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    Today @ 12:17 PM
    Location
    Cascadia
    Posts
    58,671
    Status
    Online
    Thanks
    3,391
    Thanked 6,281 Times in 4,711 Posts


    Rep Power
    143
    GAllahYR doesn't even know His own sabbath day, apparently.

  34. #27
    Banned
    132dB's At Your Service

    Member No
    25
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Last Online
    05-21-2013 @ 07:57 PM
    Location
    20' Above Water
    Posts
    10,849
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    2,599
    Thanked 334 Times in 307 Posts


    Blog Entries
    1
    Rep Power
    0
    You mean to say "shabbat"..?

  35. #28
    Banned
    Member No
    5226
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Last Online
    06-13-2016 @ 10:02 PM
    Location
    .
    Posts
    12,707
    Status
    Offline
    Thanks
    1,428
    Thanked 1,438 Times in 1,119 Posts


    Rep Power
    0
    Which part of the "It's not funny" have you not quite grasped, Gayr?

    Cheers! :bottle:

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Are Michael Anthonys' daughters legal yet?
    By WARF in forum Main VH/DLR Discussion
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 07-06-2007, 06:38 PM
  2. And it all started with my Sons BB gun
    By Ozzy Fudd in forum Max's Non VH/DLR Related Stuff
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 07-21-2006, 05:05 AM
  3. Kerry's Daughters Love Cock
    By JCOOK in forum The Front Line
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 10-15-2004, 10:36 AM
  4. Bush Daughters Comfort The Wounded...
    By Sarge in forum The Front Line
    Replies: 79
    Last Post: 04-14-2004, 02:09 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •