THWACK! The Golf Thread

[ashstralia]

hey Hr i've managed to successfully combine rock music, golf, and astronomy for 32 years and counting...

they don't have to be mutually exclusive!

[Hardrock69]

Gotcha.

[ashstralia]

me, nicko, eddie, alice.

my dream golfing 4. i shall email them and make it happen. for charity, of course.

[ashstralia]

not a bad band there, either! i'll play bass.

[ashstralia]

don't think we'll be playing tomorrow....

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[Whorehey]

Or the next day. Shit Ash, did a dam break or something?

[Hardrock69]

Tropical storm been pounding him I believe...

[ashstralia]

yeah... and just like that it's gone south. today we're back to sunny humid 31℃.

it's gonna take at least a week for everything to drain away and dry out though.

we had 15-16 inches of rain in 3 days.

[chefcraig]

Finally, now that the less than thrilling Hawaiian swing and the pointless Tiger-drama is over, the season can actually tee off this week with the Phoenix Open. This is one of the most entertaining tournaments on the tour, worth watching for the 16th hole alone. This consists of a fairly difficult par 3, with a drive over sand, rocks and brush and a postage stamp sized green. It is surrounded on all sides by a stadium full of drunkards more blasted than the revelers of your local at New Years, whom more often than not boo the players for poor shots and cheer them even louder for well placed ones.

Here is a list of the more interesting pairings for Thursday's round: LINK

[Fairwrning]

These caddie races are great..have they always done that??

[chefcraig]

These caddie races are great..have they always done that??

That really took off a couple of years ago, mainly on Thursday & Fridays when the matches were not being shown nationally. Now, with the Golf Channel playing and replaying the event up to three times a day, things have lightened up a great deal. But I guarantee you, if the final grouping or the top few guys are in a tight fight on the leader board, you will not be seeing much or any of it.

[Fairwrning]

Yeah...I dont think we will be seeing " Bones " run for the green today..or any day..

[ashstralia]

you lucky bastids get to watch golf for free in real time.

[chefcraig]

you lucky bastids get to watch golf for free in real time.

Nah, we still have to pay for basic cable, at least. You can always go to the PGA website, but the results are fairly choppy and only reflect a portion of the coverage provided by Golf Channel, CBS, NBC, TNT and ESPN. And the less said about TNT's and ESPN's offerings, the better. (Don't get me started on Ernie Johnson or Chris Berman, two twits that never know when to shut up, let alone have a clue about golf broadcasting.)

[ashstralia]

i'll never forget that monday morning in '96 (here) when faldo beat the shark to death.

[chefcraig]

i'll never forget that monday morning in '96 (here) when faldo beat the shark to death.

Couldn't have happened to a bigger putz. Norman has always been a bit of a dick, and his collapses have somehow gone on to eclipse his victories (at least here to US fans of the sport) as a result.

[ashstralia]

hearing ya mate. his 'i'm the shark, dammit!" hype wore thin early. yeah you coulda been, greggy... but for mize tway zoeller faldo...

he's a wanker

[LoungeMachine]

Yep, you DON'T diss Golf here and get away with it....

[Fairwrning]

Forgot about this gem tho...Maybe Kristy was right..

[Whorehey]

It's Masters Week, the happiest week of them all!!!

[chefcraig]

It's Masters Week, the happiest week of them all!!!

Sort of. I could live a far better life without all of the "Can Tiger overtake Jack" bullshit being thrown about in every newspaper sports column, ESPN or Golf Channel broadcast for the past two weeks leading up until Thursday.

Perhaps I'm alone with this, but to me, Fuck Tiger Woods. Great, he's made about 4 shots during his career that I'd claim as remarkable. Other than being a player, he rates right up there with Vijay Singh (and his dimwitted, con-artist brother), Lawrence Taylor, Davis Love III and NASCAR's Busch brothers as being completely worthless on the human likeability scale.

[ashstralia]

Geezuz chef, tell us what you really think!

go the aussies, all 4 of us.

[ashstralia]

he's made about 4 shots during his career that I'd claim as remarkable.

you're an extremely tough judge.

[chefcraig]

you're an extremely tough judge.

Not so much as you'd think. More than anything, it comes from hanging around and interacting with some of these "characters" at Doral, TPC and Honda (let alone Gleason's Inverrary, back in the day). Like anyone else, get a couple of beers in them, and their accomplishments take a back seat to their own personal quirks and foibles.

[Zing!]

No shit. Tiger's made at least a half a dozen decent shots.

[Whorehey]

I want to see the big names step up this year.

I want to see at least three of them within two of each
other on the back nine on Sunday.

I want to see one of them throw one in the water on 13
while going for it in two.

[ashstralia]

I want to see the big names step up this year.

I want to see at least three of them within two of each
other on the back nine on Sunday.

I want to see one of them throw one in the water on 13
while going for it in two.

and just miss the chip for a tap in par!!

seriously guys, watch tiger at pebble in 2000 again. that's the tiger i wanna see...

[Zing!]

seriously guys, watch tiger at pebble in 2000 again. that's the tiger i wanna see...

A machine?

[Whorehey]

My Yahoo Fantasy Golf picks are in.

A Group Tiger Woods, Bill Haas.
B Group Justin Rose, Matt Kuchar, Jim Furyk, Dustin Johnson.
C Group Rickie Fowler, Stewart Cink.

Now I got a day to talk myself out of them.

[ashstralia]

I hope Jason Day does well. Champion bloke.

[ashstralia]

A machine?

Pretty much, Z! He was amazing that weekend. And how about that chip in at 16 a few years ago? (I think it was '05) that was pure art.

[Zing!]

I was bagging on basketball in another thread - and I don't know if I can qualify golf as a real sport - but I can appreciate greatness when I see it. Maybe it's because at my age it's the only game I have left, so I can relate to how good you have to be to play even decent golf and not embarrass yourself. Whereas I can't stand to watch basketball on the tele, I could watch golf for hours. The way these guys make shot after shot look routine (and the occasional melt-down, natch) is fascinating to me.

[ashstralia]

I'm hearing you, mate. That final 9 at Augusta has been some of the most entertaining tv I've ever seen. Just watching dudes try to hold it together while battling their own minds and nerves is spectacular. Can't wait for the weekend.

Btw, Aussie Rugby League is a pretty good watch, too! Saturday night's game South Sydney vs Melbourne will be epic. Both teams are undefeated after 5 rounds...

[chefcraig]

Yeah, Tiger's twisty, turny hole out was pretty good. Yet you have never felt anything that compares, unless you happened to be hanging around the fairway, somewhat sunburnt and beer sodden, when this little nipper fired the shot heard around the world. And yes, there is a monument honoring his shot that day.

[Zing!]

You can't end a round of golf much better than that unless there were strippers in the clubhouse cracking open the champagne.

[Fairwrning]

Ill go with Rory McIlroy this weekend

[ashstralia]

yeah! popeye's shot was pretty freakin cool...

[chefcraig]

You can't end a round of golf much better than that unless there were strippers in the clubhouse cracking open the champagne.

yeah! popeye's shot was pretty freakin cool...

What a great deal of folks don't know is the poor bastard almost missed the match entirely. For one reason or another, he snoozed through his wake up call and awoke in his hotel to find he was roughly ten minutes from his tee time. He ran into the bathroom, wiped his face, and still wearing the clothes from the previous evening, got in a cab to meet his caddy. About three to five minutes late, he teed off and managed to survive his opening round. He did better the next day, scoring a round that made the cut. After that, he kinda laid back, not drawing much attention on Saturday, yet come Sunday, he was on top. As I recall, (and bear in mind, I was somewhat sloshed) Scott Verplank hit a long hook that went into the trees at the bend on the 18th, meaning he'd need to create one hell of a long snap to merely reach the green. Instead, the fireplug unleashed the most unexpected shot in the history of golf, flying straight into the wind over water and dropping the ball after a single bounce right into the cup.

To this day, it's the most remarkable shot I've ever witnessed. The tv clips do not serve the story justice, as the crowd's ovation roar was louder than anything I've ever heard, and that includes a Deep Purple/Nazareth show from 1975 or 76.

[ashstralia]

aah, the marvellous ritual of rising at 5am to find an aussie atop the leaderboard!!

it's 5:42 am here now; sun's not up yet...

[ashstralia]

all 4 aussies within 2...

c'mon boys!!!