1. You're arrested in college for assaulting a cop. Charges are dropped, but a nice entry into the life of thuggery.
2. You tried to return sheets that were stolen. Of course, you had no idea they were, and charges were dropped. Nice second foray...beneath the first, under the current...but let's everyone know you are gearing for wonder.
3. You are at the nightclub with Javon Walker and Darrent Williams, when Williams was shot and killed. You testified that you escalated the situation, I believe by spraying folks with champagne...among some other things. Big jump...sweet...
4. Then the arrest for suspicion of domestic violence with your girlfriend at the time. An Anger management class later, and charges are dropped! You're clean as a whistle.
5. DUI! You can't be a thug...er...playa without a DUI!
6. Misdemeanor battery with your again long-time girlfriend. Good to see you are still together...er...apart...er...huh?
7. New girlfriend/fiance, same situation! Arrested for disorderly conduct after a "dispute" with your chica, but the charges were dropped, so it's all good.
8. MARRIAGE TO CRAZY LADY 2!
9. Hey, you are not guilty for the misdemeanor battery (#6) with your CRAZY LADY 1! You are the man!
10. STABBED BY CRAZY LADY 1! She's in jail, and you had surgery. Marshall says he fell on broken glass, while CRAZY LADY 2 says it was self defense.
You are a fucking superstar!
...fucking piece of shit...
er...SUPERSTAR!
Good to see the justice system working for THE MAN!