"The Ched Chunkhead Opens His Insufferable Piehole And Inserts Both Feet" Thread

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  • SNIPER
    Crazy Ass Mofo
    • Jun 2004
    • 2625

    The Ched Chunker couldn't shine Dave's guitar strap.

    Comment

    • SNIPER
      Crazy Ass Mofo
      • Jun 2004
      • 2625

      Originally posted by Nitro Express

      Excuse me Sam but Dave does play guitar. He's just smart enough to know when you have Eddie Fuckin Van Halen in your band you don't need to try and compete with him.
      Never heard this. Pretty kick ass!! You gotta have some soul to play like that.

      Comment

      • Halen High
        Commando
        • Jul 2004
        • 1231

        Originally posted by Greenbuds
        Mike will always be Sammy's stooge. I've said it before and will say again - anyone who gives a rat's ass about Mike Anthony is not a fan of DLR or Classic VH. He hates DLR and would replace Dave in a second with Spammy. From Ched's book, the foreward by MA:

        -----

        Before Sammy showed up, we were all pretty devastated. It looked like
        the band had possibly come to the end after Roth left. When we’d first
        signed with Warner Bros., friends in the business told us that five
        years was a good life span for a rock group. We figured we may have
        had our run. The label wasn’t very enthusiastic, either. They didn’t
        even want us to continue to call the band Van Halen. Eddie and Al
        didn’t know what to do. They tossed around names of singers and we did
        have a couple of unknown guys come in and sing with us because we
        thought that bringing in somebody already known would change the
        dynamic of the band. That didn’t work, and nobody knew what to do
        until Claudio Zampoli, Eddie’s car mechanic, suggested that he call
        Sammy.

        All of a sudden we’re taking it to a new level. Not only do we have
        this guy who can really sing, but now we’ve got another guitar player,
        too. It was something new, something different, and Eddie was really
        into it. Sammy was the key. He was the guy who took us to a new,
        higher plateau with Van Halen.

        With Sammy, we had real melody. He was just a great all-around
        musician. Eddie could say, “Hey, Sam, I got this idea,” and Sammy
        could pick up a guitar and go, “Yes, but what about this?” That was
        all new with us. We started to become a much more musical band.
        With Sammy in the band, Van Halen went through the roof. The band
        scored a string of number one multiplatinum albums. We ruled the arena
        rock world and played before capacity crowds night after night for
        more than ten years. We were the world champion hard-rock band and
        Sammy took us there.

        He is the most upbeat, positive guy in the world. He loves life. He
        only happens to be a singer and play music, too. And another
        thing—he’s no bullshitter. If Sammy says it happened, it did. There’s
        nobody else anywhere like him. I don’t know how to put it. Sam is one
        crazy motherfucker. But I mean that in only the best possible way.


        - Michael Anthony

        ----
        I've always tried to refrain from taking shots at Mike as he's one of the original legendary four, but reading this makes it very difficult to continue having the same level of respect this guy.

        So where do we start? First, it's clear Mike continues to allow his friendship with Hagar to colour his judgement, whether it be in terms of being honest about the band's history and legacy, or who should be fronting them. It's also interesting that he admits Sammy was not even on the radar, not considered at all as a replacement by the band and his hiring was simply based on desparation and a suggestion by a mutual aquaintance. Yet many a sheep has claimed Sammy was always wanted by them, even while Dave was in the band.

        As for the claim Hagar took them to a higher level - that is complete nonsense and Mike knows it. No artist has EVER cited the Van Hagar era as an influence and I can't recall any other famous artist or musician ever saying they prefered Van Hagar, or even thought it was on the same level as CVH. That says it all and I'm sure Mike is well aware of the lack of respect for the Van Hagar era among his peers. Yet he puts his name to this rubbish? It does nothing for his credibility. OBVIOUSLY he's sticking up for his mate and he's bitter about his own demise, but all he's doing is making himself look as twisted as Hagar. Really pathetic and childish stuff from someone who is usually seen as 'a class act'.

        Oh and selling out arenas everywhere Mike? You've clearly been spending too much time with Hagar. In Australia, Van Halen had almost disappeared from popular culture by the early-mid 90s, after being THE coolest hard rock band on the planet in 1985.

        It's almost as if Hagar wrote this piece and Mike just signed it. I wouldn't be surprised.
        Last edited by Halen High; 03-01-2012, 05:22 AM.

        Comment

        • DavidLeeNatra
          TOASTMASTER GENERAL
          • Jan 2004
          • 10703

          well...what shall TAFKAB say? "I know, I am with the wrong guy playing cruises and KFC parking lots instead of playing madison square garden with the greatest frontman on earth and the king of ten fingers and six strings and I am biting my own dick for that"?

          he can't say that the Dave years were more important to the legacy of the band and maybe he REALLY doesn't see it this way. maybe he liked it more in the 1985-1996 years. so be it...there are more people out there saying "bon jovi is a great rock band"...I'm fine with that...as long as Dave and Ed are out there playing their asses off as they do...

          next thing will be that sammy will say "they never had a #1 album with dave, but four in a row with me...if we had put out a new album it would have been the biggest thing ever outselling Adele, U2, Whitney and Micheal together..."

          so what, fatty...bring it on...you will never be invited to that party again...and I know the trouble with never...
          Roth Army Icon
          First official owner of ADKOT (Deluxe Version)

          Comment

          • Halen High
            Commando
            • Jul 2004
            • 1231

            Mike: "He is the most upbeat, positive guy in the world."

            BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

            Mike: "And another thing—he’s no bullshitter. If Sammy says it happened, it did."

            A neutral fan at the VHND, who loves Sammy as much as Dave, bought Sammy's book and posted his thoughts on it at the website. He was so appalled at the extent of the lying, he wrote up a 2,000+ word response, exposing all the bullshit. From fictional tour attendances, to claiming to have been in Van Halen longer than Dave, to saying Van Hagar sold more albums than CVH, on and on it went - lie after lie after lie - and all in print.

            Oh but that's right, "if Sammy says it happened, it did." Good one Mike.
            Last edited by Halen High; 03-01-2012, 05:52 AM.

            Comment

            • sadaist
              TOASTMASTER GENERAL
              • Jul 2004
              • 11625

              Sammy just can't let it go.


              He was in the greatest American rock band ever.
              He IS in a great lineup of a band now.
              He does have a pretty decent solo catalog.
              He does have a boatload of money & will never run out.

              This guy should be happy & content. It's okay to be proud of his time in VH, and it's okay for him to think those tunes were great. But someone really just needs to grab Sammys shoulders and turn him 180 degrees. Dude is facing the past & not the future.

              Sammy was the replacement. He seems to think somehow Dave is replacing him. Weird. Sam should just congratulate the guys on the new album & be thankful he got to keep Daves seat warm for his rightful return.
              “Great losses often bring only a numb shock. To truly plunge a victim into misery, you must overwhelm him with many small sufferings.”

              Comment

              • Yount
                Commando
                • Jan 2012
                • 1099

                Originally posted by sadaist
                He IS in a great lineup of a band now.
                I agree with your post but I object to the word "great" being used to describe Chickenchips. Prefer "slightly above average" or "solid"
                (and that's being pretty generous)

                Satch is the only guy who could be considered great.
                Last edited by Yount; 03-01-2012, 07:27 AM.

                Comment

                • sadaist
                  TOASTMASTER GENERAL
                  • Jul 2004
                  • 11625

                  Originally posted by Yount
                  I agree with your post but I object to the word "great" being used to describe Chickenchips. Prefer "slightly above average" or "solid"
                  (and that's being pretty generous)

                  Satch is the only guy who could be considered great.

                  Well, I said great lineup. Just because the players could be considered great does NOT mean they are great together. Chocolate is great & so is rainbow trout. But not together. Joe is great....inarguable. The others? Well, they've been in great bands so the argument could be made. But my point was that Sammy should be happy with the great cards he has been dealt rather than trying to steal all of David Lee Roths poker chips constantly.
                  “Great losses often bring only a numb shock. To truly plunge a victim into misery, you must overwhelm him with many small sufferings.”

                  Comment

                  • twonabomber
                    formerly F A T
                    ROTH ARMY WEBMASTER

                    • Jan 2004
                    • 11189

                    Originally posted by Yount
                    He had some talent. Sad to see a band torn apart by jealousy and insecurity, and Hagar was no fix. He brought these two qualities in spades.


                    SAMMY: I have no idea what these guys went through with Dave as a singer in the band – but with me, I tell you, being a former guitarist, I can see a guitar riff that Edward has in a song or something, and maybe appreciate it a bit more than a guy who doesn't play guitar. So like maybe someone else would overlook a really great lick just because they weren't a guitarist and couldn't say, "Hey, that's a really great lick."

                    AS IF
                    yeah. "hey, theat's a really great lick, and i'm gonna wrap these shitty lyrics around it!"

                    and i'm not going to re-quote the book forward, but i'd bet Sammy wrote that shit, too.
                    Writing In All Proper Case Takes Extra Time, Is Confusing To Read, And Is Completely Pointless.

                    Comment

                    • Yount
                      Commando
                      • Jan 2012
                      • 1099

                      Originally posted by sadaist
                      But my point was that Sammy should be happy with the great cards he has been dealt rather than trying to steal all of David Lee Roths poker chips constantly.
                      Absolutely. Besides the lyrics, it's not a bad sound they've got going.

                      Comment

                      • ODShowtime
                        ROCKSTAR

                        • Jun 2004
                        • 5812

                        Originally posted by Halen High
                        "if Sammy says it happened, it did." Good one Mike.

                        That quote is especially distasteful.
                        gnaw on it

                        Comment

                        • Mr Walker
                          Crazy Ass Mofo
                          • Jan 2004
                          • 2536

                          Fucking Queers!

                          Comment

                          • Seshmeister
                            ROTH ARMY WEBMASTER

                            • Oct 2003
                            • 35157

                            There goes my lunch...

                            Comment

                            • NIN1211
                              Head Fluffer
                              • Jan 2012
                              • 386

                              LOL.....I'll skip breakfast this morning. Damn Teletubbies....I bet they are singing When It's Love.....look at Mikey singing those impossible to replace harmonies. I use to despise the Chunker....now I am actually starting to feel sorry for him. What happens when Mellencamp goes on tour? The drummer from Tom Petty's band will step in. Joke.

                              Hey psycho, please get out of my Van Halen T-shirt before you jinx the band and they break up.

                              Comment

                              • DLR'sCock
                                Crazy Ass Mofo
                                • Jan 2004
                                • 2937

                                Well you can't replace the sound and tone of Mike's voice. He has a unique sounding voice, and backing harmonies that were one half Mike and one half Ed are/were a part of the VH sound. Wolf is doing a great job, what a gifted kid.

                                Comment

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