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Thread: Creepy Fucking Cultish Mormon Douchebags

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    Creepy Fucking Cultish Mormon Douchebags

    Holocaust survivor and author of Night, Elie Wiesel, protests weird, creepy Mormon fetish to "baptize" Jews postmortem...

    The Colbert ReportGet More: Colbert Report Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,Video Archive
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    Laughing at Colbert, not posthumous baptism of Jews. Someone needs to scratch Anne Frank off the list or she'll be baptized 10 times.
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    I think they must have ran out of names to do so they just are redoing them. They need to cook up another scam to create busy work to keep the members busy and paying tithing donations for the privilege. Maybe just having sex orgies in the baptism font time machine to dump positive energy into the earth's ley line grid so it won't be destroyed by Niribu and the Annunaki. The Mormons need to go new age.



    All I know is all these political and Wall Street fucks can't create bullshit as good as the church clergy does.
    Last edited by Nitro Express; 02-27-2012 at 05:04 PM.
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    Some Jews did baptize, such as My cousin John. It's not a common practice though. Those who are baptized in My name do so, because I told John to do so unto me. But it was My choice, as it should be the choice of anyone who is baptized.

    Do not worry for dead Jews or thine own dead relatives, for they have already moved on to their eternal destination, and ye cannot do anything for them from Earth.

    And verily, if they are in Heaven (trust Me, Anne Frank made the cut) then what need hath they of further baptism or conversion anyway?
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    Hilter's Mormon temple records:
    http://www.mrm.org/files/images/hitler_baptism.jpg

    You can't enter exaltation and become a god without being married in the temple. So the Mormons proxy married Adolf Hitler to Eva Braun in the temple. All Adolf's work has been done.
    http://www.utlm.org/images/hitlertemplerecord2.gif

    It's interesting to note Adolf Hitler's proxy baptism and other temple ordinances were performed in the London England temple. The same city he bombed the shit out of when he was alive.
    Last edited by Nitro Express; 03-02-2012 at 04:19 AM.

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    Childish.
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    Hitler??

    Why in the name of Elohim's sacred holy panties would they baptize fucking HITLER?
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    Everyone's temple work needs to be done. Then that person can choose to accept it or reject it and then of course your acts in this life come into play as well. See Mormons believe all your church ordinances need to be done on this physical earth and you need those ordinances to reach the highest degree of heaven to become a god. So all these people who have died can't progress in the next life.

    In reality it's just a way to create a reason for church members to go to the temple. The church makes temple attendance a real social status symbol and to get in it, you have to pay at least 10% of your gross earnings to the church and do whatever they tell your to do. They actually make you swear an oath everything you own or will own can be used to further the purposes of the church. So the church becomes above everything else much like how the mob becomes over everything including family when new mob members are sworn in. Then to reach god hood you have to marry another mormon in the temple. Family members who don't have a temple recommend can't go to family weddings. So you do all these ordinances for yourself the first time and then you do them for dead people the rest of the times. Good mormons are expected to go to the temple once a month. So they need a lot of names to keep millions of Mormons busy.

    So what's really going on with this is it's a way to pressure the members to pay the church money, do free labor for the church, and give the church and excuse to take your assets. It's also a way to make sure you marry another member of the church and to pressure extended family members to have their temple cards current to go to the wedding. So this creates a huge amount of social and family pressure and the church makes a lot of money off of it and it keeps the church going generation after generation. Without the temple system the church would have faded away a long time ago. This crazy system is actually the glue that holds the church together and makes sure the next generation stays in.

    It's pretty sick when you actually figure out what they are really using it all for.

    Dead dunking the dead is just busy work. One former temple president left the church and spilled the beans saying the church runs out of names and just reuses them in another temple. That's why Ann Frank has been dead dunked a bunch of times.
    To show you how out of it the church is, they could have had a person in London do Adolf Hitler's temple work who lost a close relative in World War II due to Hitler's actions. I mean if you are going to baptize and marry Hitler it's beet not to do it in the London temple. But the church doesn't care. It probably got into their computer system and London is where it got spat out of.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Seshmeister View Post
    Childish.
    It created an organization worth $80 billion.

    http://www.ksl.com/?nid=148&sid=1942...cid=featured-1

    Here's the new $5 billion mall the church just finished in downtown Salt Lake City.

    It might be crazy and childish but man does it make money. The Mormons are some of the largest owners of real estate in the US. Prime real estate too.

    Of course that mall project will lose money but that's not the purpose for why they built it. The real reason is Salt Lake City is no longer a Mormon city. The Mormons have left for the suburbs and hispanics and polynesians have moved in. So the city is liberal now and the citizens vote Democratic. Rocky Anderson was mayor. So the church no longer controls the city politically so they just bought up a big chunk of it so they can control it with their security. Why? They can't move the historic temple square so they will just buy up that whole part of town. They even paid the city off with enough money to buy city streets. So you are looking at an organization rich enough to basically throw down $5 billion to control a part of the city by buying it up.
    Last edited by Nitro Express; 03-02-2012 at 05:12 AM.

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    Funny, because I recall something about Hitler and the Nazis justifying wanton murder of Jews as releasing basically good souls trapped in evil Jew vessels....for anyone that doesn't think this superstitious bullshit isn't dangerous...

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    Fuck this and fuck that
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    So the Mor(m)ons have dead-dunked Hitler AND many of his Holocaust victims?

    Must be a little awkward when they meet up at the LDS temple on Kolob.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nickdfresh View Post
    Funny, because I recall something about Hitler and the Nazis justifying wanton murder of Jews as releasing basically good souls trapped in evil Jew vessels....for anyone that doesn't think this superstitious bullshit isn't dangerous...
    I don't recall that...
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