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Thread: Obama White House proves itself weak on defense yet again

  1. #1
    Dr. Lulz
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    Obama White House proves itself weak on defense yet again

    https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/pet...-2016/wlfKzFkN

    original petition:

    Secure resources and funding, and begin construction of a Death Star by 2016.
    Those who sign here petition the United States government to secure funding and resources, and begin construction on a Death Star by 2016.

    By focusing our defense resources into a space-superiority platform and weapon system such as a Death Star, the government can spur job creation in the fields of construction, engineering, space exploration, and more, and strengthen our national defense.
    and the response

    OFFICIAL WHITE HOUSE RESPONSE TO
    Secure resources and funding, and begin construction of a Death Star by 2016.
    This Isn't the Petition Response You're Looking For
    By Paul Shawcross

    The Administration shares your desire for job creation and a strong national defense, but a Death Star isn't on the horizon. Here are a few reasons:

    The construction of the Death Star has been estimated to cost more than $850,000,000,000,000,000. We're working hard to reduce the deficit, not expand it.
    The Administration does not support blowing up planets.
    Why would we spend countless taxpayer dollars on a Death Star with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship?
    However, look carefully (here's how) and you'll notice something already floating in the sky -- that's no Moon, it's a Space Station! Yes, we already have a giant, football field-sized International Space Station in orbit around the Earth that's helping us learn how humans can live and thrive in space for long durations. The Space Station has six astronauts -- American, Russian, and Canadian -- living in it right now, conducting research, learning how to live and work in space over long periods of time, routinely welcoming visiting spacecraft and repairing onboard garbage mashers, etc. We've also got two robot science labs -- one wielding a laser -- roving around Mars, looking at whether life ever existed on the Red Planet.

    Keep in mind, space is no longer just government-only. Private American companies, through NASA's Commercial Crew and Cargo Program Office (C3PO), are ferrying cargo -- and soon, crew -- to space for NASA, and are pursuing human missions to the Moon this decade.

    Even though the United States doesn't have anything that can do the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs, we've got two spacecraft leaving the Solar System and we're building a probe that will fly to the exterior layers of the Sun. We are discovering hundreds of new planets in other star systems and building a much more powerful successor to the Hubble Space Telescope that will see back to the early days of the universe.

    We don't have a Death Star, but we do have floating robot assistants on the Space Station, a President who knows his way around a light saber and advanced (marshmallow) cannon, and the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency, which is supporting research on building Luke's arm, floating droids, and quadruped walkers.

    We are living in the future! Enjoy it. Or better yet, help build it by pursuing a career in a science, technology, engineering or math-related field. The President has held the first-ever White House science fairs and Astronomy Night on the South Lawn because he knows these domains are critical to our country's future, and to ensuring the United States continues leading the world in doing big things.

    If you do pursue a career in a science, technology, engineering or math-related field, the Force will be with us! Remember, the Death Star's power to destroy a planet, or even a whole star system, is insignificant next to the power of the Force.

    Paul Shawcross is Chief of the Science and Space Branch at the White House Office of Management and Budget
    I've got the cure you're thinkin' of.

    http://i.imgur.com/jBw4fCu.gif

  2. #2
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    That is so awesome.

    And it is great that the suits in DEE SEE can set aside all seriousness for just a moment.

  3. #3
    Cunning Linguist
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  4. #4
    Internetmaimment*TM
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    Fuck Yea. Lol I would have never thought that I would ever ever see a President in my lifetime that was actually kewl (Truman was gone before I was born).

    Commercial Crew and Cargo Program Office (C3PO) was the best bit.

    Roth On!
    Can't Control your Future. Can't Control your Friends. The women start to hike their skirts up. I didn't have a clue. That is when I kinda learned how to smile a lot. One Two Three Fouir fun ter thehr fuur.

  5. #5
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    See, they're not tyrannical, they're "kewl"...



  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dr. Love View Post
    We're working hard to reduce the deficit, not expand it.
    “If bullshit was currency, Joe Biden would be a billionaire.” - George W. Bush

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by ELVIS View Post
    See, they're not tyrannical, they're "kewl"...


    Elbow, you are just jealous you don't have super-prez powers as illustrated below:


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uqhzWlqN3uc





    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKF7BMyZsxI
    Last edited by SunisinuS; 01-12-2013 at 04:27 PM.

  8. #8
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    Knew it would piss ELBOW off...

  9. #9
    The Menace Is Loose Again
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hardrock69 View Post
    That is so awesome.

    And it is great that the suits in DEE SEE can set aside all seriousness for just a moment.

    Totally. A silly petition gets a silly response. Love it.
    “Great losses often bring only a numb shock. To truly plunge a victim into misery, you must overwhelm him with many small sufferings.”

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