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Anonymous (08-11-2013)
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Jesus Christ (08-12-2013),WARF (08-11-2013)
WARF (08-11-2013)
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He's just as real as any of the others...
WARF (08-11-2013)
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Anonymous (08-11-2013)
Hardly a week goes by when there isn't a news story about someone rising up from the dead somewhere.
I remember a case where this guy was just waiting to be identified before he was buried.
ONE WEEK in the morgue, he was.
Then he just walked out.
When they move graves from one place to the other, MANY bodies have shifted. "Oh, that's normal" you say. Gases coming out of the decomposing body, shifts on the soil, etc.
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE CLAWINGS????
Now that I've raised your attention to it, look for it in newspapers. Talk to your gravedigger.
And despair.
Cheers!
You can get coffins with WiFi now.
I think I'll get one and post from there when it happens...
Never was (08-11-2013)
Anonymous (08-11-2013)
Knowing the way the universe works, there'll be a blackout in the area you're buried.
Just as you manage to connect & send a message of help, it's too late.
You've only got oxygen for another 2 minutes.
So you'll be kicking & screaming to get out of the coffin & kicking & screaming because the connection keeps dropping.
Good on ya, Sesh. You just manage to DOUBLE your suffering. Since time dilates when you're suffering, you just managed to roughly quadruple the amount of panic you'll be in.
Good luck.
Fuck that shit. I wanna burn. Quick & easy.
Cheers!
DONNIEP (08-11-2013)
Absolute laughable shit. Sorry, great if it worked for you, but the rest of the world don't work that way. Where was God when somebody pulled down on me? Or when a family member was struck down? I guess he was on vacation...
Bottom fucking line is all you have is your ass. How you go from there is all up to you. And only you. All the rest is only side stepping the larger issue of bucking up and not looking for a crutch.
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Sensible Shoes (08-11-2013)
I confess, I havent read every post in this thread...but did anyone ever consider the fact that what was happening 10-15 years ago just doesnt apply anymore? The dynamics are totally different, and instead of a wide range, hardcore group of posters, there is no longer the intimacy and bond there once was? It cant be reproduced. Not here...not anywhere. Never. I cant figure out why there is any competition, if in fact, there is. Maybe Im just not paying enough attention?
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I'm planning to donate my body to necrophiliacs.
I think those guys get a bad press, if organ donation isn't assault then why do people get so upset about dead bodies being fucked?
I'm going to launch an asshole donation card that people can carry. I think it would be nice to pass on some happiness to someone for a few days after you die.
Oh I can't wait to see this thread tomorrow.
Only to get them out of this thread.
I haven't watched them - I know fuck all about it and it's not my fight. American race politics are very odd to outsiders.
I don't know if God exists or not, but if he does, he's got one fucked up sense of humor.
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I can't say God absolutley does not exist. I've had too many "divine interventions". One time I was going to fast through a canyon and got sideways and was about to slide down the side of the mountain until I clipped a telephone pole just hard enough to get the car back onto the road and continue my drunken journey home. Another time my car stalled for no apparent reason at an intersection and saved me from getting T boned by a truck that ran the red light and killed a lady going the opposite way I was going. Call it luck but I always felt like someone or something was looking out for me.
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I had another incident that really sticks in my mind. I was going to go for a ride on my new Harley with a couple friends but it was so cold my bike needed to thaw out to start. My friends were willing to wait but I told them never mind because maybe It didn't start because someone or something didn't want me to take that ride. They took off and one of them hit a van backing out of a driveway without looking and was killed instantly a few hours later. I kept thinking that might have been me had I gone for that ride.
I would never say that God doesn't exist. I just wish He would return a few phone calls......
FORD (08-11-2013)
FORD (08-11-2013)
You can take your guardian sock and shove it up your ass. I expect this shit from my enemies but I thought we were friends. How many times do I have to tell you I'm sick and fucking tired of hearing fucking footwear comments. Thanx for ruining an otherwise nice day here at the Army.
Why should I respect your belief based on absolutely zero evidence that you are so important that a supernatural creature stepped in and did some magic to save you when you were drunk driving but was happy enough to leave 20 000 children to die?
Do you not think your belief is kind of offensive to all those dead children or at least their parents?
No I don't. I never said I was more important than anyone. When my sister died my mother lost faith in everything and died a sad bitter woman. I saw it more of a merciful being calling her home to stop her from suffering any longer from the terminal lung disease she was born with. If there is a God he or she or it if you prefer might have an agenda we just don't understand.
I still have a sense of humor but sock comments tend to piss me off. There's still a handfull of assholes out there that would have everyone believe I don't touch my own dick because I'm afraid I'll turn gay because I posted it as a fucking joke 5 fucking years ago in a thread about some faggot sucking his own dick. The guy that sucked his own dick got a pass but I haven't heard anything but sock fucker this and sockfucker that ever since.
I'm not trying to insult or upset you just putting up ideas.
In the real world maybe the 'respect beliefs' thing is necessary as a social lubricant so that rival superstitions don't kill each other but on here we should be able to talk freely and maybe examine thoughts about life the universe and everything.
I'm guessing that the 20 000 dead children thing never occurred to you before.
Hey I've always liked to think I'm the most important person on the planet too but I'm starting to suspect I may just be a statistical nothing...
Yes, you are.
Look, if the world revolves around someone, it has to be only ONE person.
And that's either me or David Beckham.
The way I see it, me & him are cruising through life having a lark. If that's true, given that he's slightly more succesful than me, the world revolves around him.
If he actually tried hard to get to where he is, then it revolves around me, because what I've got simply fell on my lap. Was handed to me by the world.
And I'm thankful for it everyday.
Cheers!
There's been many atrocities that if you could say God should have prevented but maybe it doesn't work that way. Maybe we're born with an expiration date and someone or something watches over us to make sure we make it to that date. As far as my personal experience they say drunks have guardian Angels. Maybe they're right.
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