When Music Gets The Be Pretty Fucking Retarded

[Kristy]

I've been a huge fan Vince Guaraldi. The man was simply a god damn visionary musical genius who deserves to recognized on the same playing field as Bill Evans and Art Tatum. Between the three Vince is the best to listen to while stoned out of your fucking mind. Sure, you can make for an argument that he sold his soul and opted to write cheesy "pop jazz" for proletariat commercial television for obligatory end of the year consumer materialism that stared a bunch of scruffy animated miscreants who all had severe psychological issues - especially the lead character who seemed to be suffering with a chronic form of depression that would make Robin Williams blush:

"What a liberal fag." - Trollvis

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, Vince Guaraldi...fucking genius blah, blah, blah. When Vince was "commissioned" to write for these oddly depressing cartoon holiday series he wrote his best work. One of them was the 'Linus & Lucy' theme which from what I can tell is an ode to family incest because that whole Peanuts cartoon was really, really fucked up in so many ways. Imagine a fucking beagle who can magically time travel with a flying dog house to shoot down proto-Nazis. Am I right? Fucking-A I am!

"See! Right there on the ground! No sign of a Holocaust! - Trollvis

Now the Linus And Lucy theme has been covered by so many and any dude who can play it on the gee-tur with a degree or competence can play with my steering wheel anytime. But...then came this and really, Vince's brilliant tune suddenly turned all Coldplay. I'll never feel the same way about Vince's music after I heard this. Fucking retards.

WARNING Listen at your own risk, cretins:

[dazzlindino]

cant listen right now....or should I just say its ghey and be done with it....

[Kristy]

There is ghey and beyond ghey. This is beyond ghey. Why do the women in the "choir" looking oddly shaped and the men as if they just stepped out of an episode of The Waltons?

This fucking new weed I've been trying it's really fucking my head up in ways I have not been prepared.

This whole subject is ridiculous.

Excuse me, I'm going to go take a massive crap. I've been supplying my lower intestine with a lot of yogurt for no other reason other then it was on sale.

[TFM_Dale]

Holy shit, Kristy is Jamie Lee Curtis!!!!!!

[WARF]

Cherry Orchids yoplait?

[Kristy]

Good crap though. A two-bar floater with a added string cheese looking thingy. Not really a plugger but a bona-fide pipe gobbler nonetheless.

Fuck, I love weed at holiday time.

[dazzlindino]

good grief woman...or should it be Charlie brown considering the thread....
any how...would really like to turn your steering wheel...if I only knew what "steering wheel" meant...haha...

[Kristy]

By the way, whenever I take a crap it always ends up looking something similar to this:

[Kristy]

or should it be Charlie brown considering the thread...

There is a reason why Charlie Brown was never all that popular as many (i.e., THE MAN) would like you to believe. Every episode or special was thoroughly depressing as fuck. Charlie Brown was the sodden perpetual loser who knew he could never get laid if he was lobby carpet at the Astoria Hotel. Strange, when one considers he had a single pubic hair growing grossly out of his forehead. Even his "friends" were like mental patients on a 24 leave and his girlfriend the biggest god damn cock tease on the planet. Then again, some men are really into tease and denial but I'm not sure Charlie was.


Did that bitch know how to blue ball him or what?

That whole show was chalked full of societal metaphors like "The Great Pumpkin" where that thumb-sucking mama's boy waits like that Beatles tune 'Fool On The Hill' for the return of his false religion god. And, despite what some may think these two were NEVER lesbians


They were closet pseudo-feminists who would go on to produce some of the most condescending, inflammatory and insulting daytime TV shows aimed at women like The View and that other one where that Botoxed-to-death Kathy Lee spews her anti-female sewage.

The only sane character on that depressing show was Sally who knew everyone else was more or less a fucking retard.


I kind of liked her even though at times she had some irregular and warped Libertarian views.

[Kristy]

See how inspirational she was in not believing in another false religion? I mean, all the girl wanted to do was give her future cult leader of a clueless boyfriend a hand job in a pumpkin patch when she can be out getting laid. I can understand her tirade even if she oversells it. And what in the fuck is wrong with that kid's hair? Alopecia at that age is a sure sign of what...cancer, malnutrition, childhood neglect? Just...sad.

[Hardrock69]

"When Music Gets The Be Pretty Fucking Retarded"

That makes perfect sense.

Not.

Just as retarded as Krusty Hatebot. Your language programming is corrupted. You need to re-install yourself.