EVH: Billboard Mag Cover Story Sneak Peek Via VHND

[DONNIEP]

Photographer: Ed, please take the jacket off.

Ed: No! I don't wanna!

P: Ed, for the love of god, he's not here!

Ed: How do you know? That Donnie fucker is everywhere!

P: Ed, what the hell are you talking about? There's nobody else here!

Ed: You don't know that. He might be here. He's mean and him and his girlfriend, some chick named Dave's Bitch, they spent like 4 months doing nothing but making fun of me. Day and nite, nite and day. "Ed's Filthy Methy Mouth" they said, over and over. So I went and got some new teeth and then they made fun of that! No! I'm not taking my jacket off!

P: Ed, please man, we have got to wrap this up.

Ed: No! Don't you get it? The whole world is out to get me: Dave won't be my friend. Sammy hates me. Mikey is jealous of me. Gary is gay. Donnie makes fun of me. And they all tell nasty lies about me! Lies! I'm not coming out!

P: Ok Ed, forget it. I'll send this one picture to the magazine and see what they say.

Ed: Can I go home now? Power Rangers is gonna be on in like 30 minutes.

[Dave's Bitch]

And I thought Dave was creepy. Well, he is, but still. What a weirdo

[DONNIEP]

And I thought Dave was creepy. Well, he is, but still. What a weirdo

If it wasn't for David Lee Roth, Ed would have spent his whole life dressed exactly like that, sitting in some little crappy rental house playing his geetar in the corner.

[Dave's Bitch]

If it wasn't for David Lee Roth, Ed would have spent his whole life dressed exactly like that, sitting in some little crappy rental house playing his geetar in the corner.

Of course he would, he's a tone chaser! I wonder if tone chaser is a euphemism for bitter old cunt or something?

[DONNIEP]

Of course he would, he's a tone chaser! I wonder if tone chaser is a euphemism for bitter old cunt or something?

I think it means either bitter old cunt OR weepy drunk. I'm hoping he's at home plugging in his hair clippers right now..bzzzzzz "Everybody tells LIES! Lies!" bzzzzrrrrzzzzzzz "No, tell Al I'm not here!" bzzzzzzzrrrerrerrrrzzzz "Woflie, run down to the beer store! I don't care what your momma said!" brrrzzzzzzz "I don't need anybody. I don't need anything, except this ashtray. And this remote control. This ashtray, this paddle ball game, the remote control, these matches, and this lamp. And that's all I need. I don't need one other thing! Not one. I need this - this chair. The paddle game, and the remote control. And the matches, for sure! Well, what are you looking at? You think I'm some kind of a jerk or something?"

[Kristy]

The "one eye" Illuminati symbolism.

[PETE'S BROTHER]

He's also running his stupid cock sucker saying Mike's voice isn't important, he can't sing, blah blah blah. In other words: Me, Me, Me, ME!! I was responsible for all of it EXCEPT the lyrics, which are so worthless to MY songs that I don't even recall any of them.

sounds warfy

[Jetstream]

Fuck this shit. I want Dave to do whatever fucking drugs he wants as long as it does not effect his balance and I want a fucking flying jump split off the drum riser for the Houston show. Fuck all the complete cultural dumb fucks who have never moved past a wide screen TV or a poster who think Eddie the 5 minute popular cultural song creator is a fucking modern day Mozart... Pink Floyd is no Mozart or Beethoven but they at least know how to approach the suggestion by making songs which can go over at least 10 minutes while Eduardo cannot even make a soundtrack for a porno movie

[PETE'S BROTHER]

I think it means either bitter old cunt OR weepy drunk. I'm hoping he's at home plugging in his hair clippers right now..bzzzzzz "Everybody tells LIES! Lies!" bzzzzrrrrzzzzzzz "No, tell Al I'm not here!" bzzzzzzzrrrerrerrrrzzzz "Woflie, run down to the beer store! I don't care what your momma said!" brrrzzzzzzz "I don't need anybody. I don't need anything, except this ashtray. And this remote control. This ashtray, this paddle ball game, the remote control, these matches, and this lamp. And that's all I need. I don't need one other thing! Not one. I need this - this chair. The paddle game, and the remote control. And the matches, for sure! Well, what are you looking at? You think I'm some kind of a jerk or something?"

he's shooting at the song cans!!!!!

[clarathecarrot]

Fuck this shit. I want Dave to do whatever fucking drugs he wants as long as it does not effect his balance and I want a fucking flying jump split off the drum riser for the Houston show. Fuck all the complete cultural dumb fucks who have never moved past a wide screen TV or a poster who think Eddie the 5 minute popular cultural song creator is a fucking modern day Mozart... Pink Floyd is no Mozart or Beethoven but they at least know how to approach the suggestion by making songs which can go over at least 10 minutes while Eduardo cannot even make a soundtrack for a porno movie

RELAX ALL YOU HOMOS!!!

It's only Rock and Roll...perhaps partake of the ever so fine pooper on Jetsteam's AV and imagine a simpler time..when all you needed was a booty to get you all hot and bothered...buy your tickets....go to a show....be the ball.....nanannaannnananana...ann..anna.nah...nah. nah...nnnnnnnnn...

[Vinnie Velvet]

Ed's latest......

Where to begin.

Kind of sounds like 1996 Eddie - but more realistic as in admitting that Roth is and forever will be THE voice of Van Halen.
But not at the 1996 levels of docuhebaggery but a douche no less.

But seriously, I kind of expected Ed to come out like this. After Roth claiming during his Billboard Awards presser that the Tokyo Dome show was the most productive he could get the Van Halens to be "...that week", I though uh oh, here we go again.

I really don't understand these guys. 60 years old and still acting like a bunch of whiney fucks. And I don't get Ed still crapping all over Mike. Granted, Mike wasn't Billy Sheenan but the proof is in the recordings: admirable bass playing and great backing vocals.

Who knows, there may be an ounce of truth in the whole video camera thing about Mike and Eddie showing him how to play parts. But its clearly an exaggeration, embellishment, whatever you want to call it.

[Jetstream]

RELAX ALL YOU HOMOS!!!

It's only Rock and Roll...perhaps partake of the ever so fine pooper on Jetsteam's AV and imagine a simpler time..when all you needed was a booty to get you all hot and bothered...buy your tickets....go to a show....be the ball.....nanannaannnananana...ann..anna.nah...nah. nah...nnnnnnnnn...

Not only are you a crazy ass mofo, you are a root so I will not take your words all that seriously... you get my point man, this is not high art, not Mozart, rock is entertainment and I want to be entertained and if not, well as the Stones said it was only Rock and Roll and that does not even get me to a point to involve the word relax with any value because booty is better lol

[clarathecarrot]

Not only are you a crazy ass mofo, you are a root so I will not take your words all that seriously... you get my point man, this is not high art, not Mozart, rock is entertainment and I want to be entertained and if not, well as the Stones said it was only Rock and Roll and that does not even get me to a point to involve the word relax with any value because booty is better lol

We are uber fans,.. but, many here are reactionary on every little comment by the VH Camp....which is cool it is something to relate about to others in the world...but really what if we just separated the PRESS ....from the SHOW...I do and it enables me the opportunity to enjoy some damn good rock and roll.

[TJMKID]

I think Hagar's book was truthful in certain parts --- namely that Edweirdo is a vampire --- he visits Skid Row at night and sucks meth out of junkie veins.

Photographer: Ed, please take the jacket off.

Ed: No! I don't wanna!

P: Ed, for the love of god, he's not here!

Ed: How do you know? That Donnie fucker is everywhere!

P: Ed, what the hell are you talking about? There's nobody else here!

Ed: You don't know that. He might be here. He's mean and him and his girlfriend, some chick named Dave's Bitch, they spent like 4 months doing nothing but making fun of me. Day and nite, nite and day. "Ed's Filthy Methy Mouth" they said, over and over. So I went and got some new teeth and then they made fun of that! No! I'm not taking my jacket off!

P: Ed, please man, we have got to wrap this up.

Ed: No! Don't you get it? The whole world is out to get me: Dave won't be my friend. Sammy hates me. Mikey is jealous of me. Gary is gay. Donnie makes fun of me. And they all tell nasty lies about me! Lies! I'm not coming out!

P: Ok Ed, forget it. I'll send this one picture to the magazine and see what they say.

Ed: Can I go home now? Power Rangers is gonna be on in like 30 minutes.

[Jetstream]

[QUOTE=Vinnie Velvet;1887992]Ed's latest......

Where to begin.

Kind of sounds like 1996 Eddie

The video camera thing I am sure happened but not in the context Eddie thinks it eventually applied to Anthony. Anthony is sleeping into the night after finally drinking too much JD and paranoid Edward is sending him videos of how to play shit because Eduardo is a control freak. Mike wakes up and glances at the like 10 videos of Edward showing how he wants to play the bass part from just that night, shakes his head and just comes in early to make it known he gets it because Mike is not great but a good professional player. Ed does this interview and then actually thinks all those videos he sent to Mike where used when they where deleted by Mike in a 'WTF' mode fashion