Swarms of Flying Homosexual Chemtrail Fire Ants Are Coming For England

[FORD]

[Anonymous]

"Swarms of Flying Homosexual" shows a lot of promise, but it takes a quick downturn with "Chemtrail Fire Ants".

I don't know, the first bit has so much potential, but they just ruin it.

However, they more than make up for it in the article about the gay beluga whale:

The genetically engineered beluga whale is showing all the classic hallmarks of homosexuality: rippling abs that shamelessly glisten in the waters beneath the summer sun, a healthy rose hue of the skin and a unnerving desire to expose Christian families to homosexuality.

It's... beautiful. It's wonderfully worded, so carefully crafted, even with the grammatical mistakes. Never before have I seen such perfect delivery.

This is pure poetry. It brings a manly tear to my heterosexual eye.