How To End Up Dead Without Really Trying

[Nitro Express]

You think cows are bad then going to bed is dangerous as fuck.

For every person in the US killed by a a bear 600 die from falling out of bed.

http://content.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1562978,00.html

Expect an executive order from the Orange Oligarch soon lowering the height of all beds...

Look. Most people don't hike where bears are. I do. I've lived in the rocky mountains most my life. A friend of mine got attacked by a bear bow hunting. Around here if you go in certain areas without making some noise and having some bear spray on you, you are stupid. I came across a bedded down bear two years ago. He scared the shit out of me and I scared the shit out of him. He ran off. If it was a mother with some cubs well then she probably would have attacked me. Quote your stats all you want. You don't live here. Most people who swim in the ocean don't get attacked by sharks either but if you are in shark infested waters then you might want to use some caution. Camp out around here with some food in your tent and see what will happen. See what the smell of those cookies will bring in. Oh no. Bear attacks are a low statistic. Yeah I will keep food in my tent instead of hanging it up away from the camp.

[FORD]

I've seen bears on a hike before. A mama & her cub. They were off in the distance, and I wasn't between her and the kid, so I wasn't too concerned about it. The pile of cougar shit that I saw on the same trail was slightly more concerning, but I never actually saw the big kitty.

[Nitro Express]

I've hunted cougars. You sit back to back with someone when you blow the call. One guy called a cougar in and it came up behind him and attacked him. I had a black bear with two cubs up the river from me when I was fly fishing and they were between me and my car and the sun was setting. I waited a while but I'm in the dark hoping that bear moved on.

[vandeleur]

I hunted a dragon once, a good six hours of battle, twice as many cans of Stella.
But I went for it.
Fuck I used to love Skyrim

[Seshmeister]

I've hunted cougars. You sit back to back with someone when you blow the call. One guy called a cougar in and it came up behind him and attacked him.

I've drank in bars like that too.

[vandeleur]

I've drank in bars like that too.

[DONNIEP]

Like ISIS and refugees the bear thing is just another myth for Americans to be frightened of.

Or for the gun makers to sell to.

There's just one problem with your statistics: bears can't read. Seriously, anybody who thinks it's a good idea to wander around defenseless in bear country should be a tour guide in Syria.

[Vony]

Bees, wasps and hornets?

Barry Gibb, Blackie Lawless and niggaz from Charlotte are not amused.

[Nickdfresh]

Look. Most people don't hike where bears are. I do. I've lived in the rocky mountains most my life. A friend of mine got attacked by a bear bow hunting. Around here if you go in certain areas without making some noise and having some bear spray on you, you are stupid. I came across a bedded down bear two years ago. He scared the shit out of me and I scared the shit out of him. He ran off. If it was a mother with some cubs well then she probably would have attacked me. Quote your stats all you want. You don't live here. Most people who swim in the ocean don't get attacked by sharks either but if you are in shark infested waters then you might want to use some caution. Camp out around here with some food in your tent and see what will happen. See what the smell of those cookies will bring in. Oh no. Bear attacks are a low statistic. Yeah I will keep food in my tent instead of hanging it up away from the camp.

Big fucking deal, Higgens. I almost ran into a motherfucking cow at 55mph because the local scumbag dairy farm just let them wander...

[cadaverdog]

Like ISIS and refugees the bear thing is just another myth for Americans to be frightened of.

Must be nice to be such a bad ass such as yourself. If someone says something you don't like you fuck em up. You don't fear wild animals or terrorists but you fear Donald Trump. Chuck Norris ain't got shit on you.

[cadaverdog]

Big fucking deal, Higgens. I almost ran into a motherfucking cow at 55mph because the local scumbag dairy farm just let them wander...

Hitting a cow could do a lot of damage to a car or a truck but you'd probably be OK. Unless the car was rear engined or low slung like a Vette or a Ferrari. Hitting a horse or any other long legged critters is a different story.

[Von Halen]

Hitting a cow could do a lot of damage to a car or a truck but you'd probably be OK. Unless the car was rear engined or low slung like a CheVette or a Ferrari. Hitting a horse or any other long legged critters is a different story.

Fixed it for you.

[cadaverdog]

Fixed it for you.

Unless it was going downhill most Chevettes couldn't go fast enough to do much damage to itself or the cow.
People make fun of Pintos but compared to Vegas and most other American made compacts they were great cars. Didn't seem like we could build a decent compact or mini truck back then. They had more power, took more abuse and were much more reliable. I wouldn't mind getting my hands on a V8 Monza though. The hatchback not the Town Car.

[Nickdfresh]

Hitting a cow could do a lot of damage to a car or a truck but you'd probably be OK. Unless the car was rear engined or low slung like a Vette or a Ferrari. Hitting a horse or any other long legged critters is a different story.

You never know. I could have been eating raw ribs in the driver seat!

[Nickdfresh]

Unless it was going downhill most Chevettes couldn't go fast enough to do much damage to itself or the cow.
People make fun of Pintos but compared to Vegas and most other American made compacts they were great cars. Didn't seem like we could build a decent compact or mini truck back then. They had more power, took more abuse and were much more reliable. I wouldn't mind getting my hands on a V8 Monza though. The hatchback not the Town Car.

I put a 350 in mine!