From 2015...Playboy ranks EVERY VH song-including ADKOT tracks

[twonabomber]

http://www.playboy.com/articles/every-van-halen-song-ever-ranked-part-1

Some random comments without giving away position on the list:

“TATTOO,” A DIFFERENT KIND OF TRUTH, ROTH
And the band is back together! The lead-off single from the reformed Van Halen with David Lee Roth on vocals and Wolfgang Van Halen on bass is pretty damn good. Catchy chorus and nice harmonies. It doesn’t try too hard to impress, just comes together with a good spirit. Nice one to bop your head to!

“TAKE ME BACK (DÉJÀ VU),” BALANCE, HAGAR
Faux cowboy Sammy Hagar might be the worst Sammy Hagar of all. This song is worse than Poison. And I mean both the band and the substance.

But you can probably guess where this one is on the list...

“HOW MANY SAY I,” VAN HALEN III, CHERONE
An unmitigated disaster. A turgid turd of a piano ballad where they find someone even worse than Gary Cherone to sing lead: Eddie Van Halen. Someone should take the worst parts of the Star Wars prequels and cut them to this tune. They both represent a genius gone mad with power. Luckily, Van Halen’s ship eventually got righted — the “reunion” album with David Lee Roth is coming if you can just hold on for a while. And if it meant suffering through this song, I guess it was worth it.

[Terry]

I keep forgetting How Many Say I was on that album: I think it's a conscious mental block to allow me to forget.

There were a few decent instrumental passages on that album. Cherone wasn't a good fit for the band, but overall a lot of the material Eddie was coming up with was half-baked, or half-realized.

I also was a bit amazed nobody at Warner Brothers had the clout or nerve to step in when hearing that particular track and flat-out say that track should be left off. Maybe Van Halen had complete creative control as part of their contract: I can't understand otherwise how something like that was given a green light as being okay for a Van Halen record. Particularly in light of the whole BOV1 fallout and the letdown fans felt that the Roth reunion didn't result in a tour and a new Roth album. Did nobody at Warners think in light of that the Cherone album had better be pretty darn good? Because the production was shitty, too. The album sounded like a demo tape. Whatever one thought of the Hagar records, for the most part they were semi-competently produced.

[twonabomber]

I don't remember who was running WBR at the time. Must have been an accountant or lawyer. You'd think a music person would have squashed the Cherone idea from the beginning.

[DavidLeeNatra]

Funny...I never listened to anything Hagar stuff past 5150 except for the "Hits" when they came on the radio or if I watched some YouTube stuff. Now I can go directly from the list into the turds and can check that I haven't missed anything.

[Seshmeister]

Funny...I never listened to anything Hagar stuff past 5150 except for the "Hits" when they came on the radio or if I watched some YouTube stuff. Now I can go directly from the list into the turds and can check that I haven't missed anything.

I'm the same I had never heard this before - I managed about 30 seconds ...

135) “TAKE ME BACK (DÉJÀ VU),” BALANCE, HAGAR
Faux cowboy Sammy Hagar might be the worst Sammy Hagar of all. This song is worse than Poison. And I mean both the band and the substance.

[Seshmeister]

WTF is this shit? I had no idea Balance was as bad as this...

134) “STRUNG OUT,” BALANCE, HAGAR
Balance’s instrumental is like a John Zorn composition — practically musique concrète. Nothing you want to listen to over and over again, but a nice respite from Sammy’s screaming on this highly unBalanced album.

[Seshmeister]

I love this guy...

120) “MINE ALL MINE,” OU812, HAGAR
Cheesy synths overwhelm this one past the point of acceptability. This song is wearing leg warmers.

[DavidLeeNatra]

I'm the same I had never heard this before - I managed about 30 seconds ...

The moment when you think, Poison wasn't that bad...

[Nickdfresh]

I keep forgetting How Many Say I was on that album: I think it's a conscious mental block to allow me to forget.
...

I wish I could...

[Von Halen]

WTF is this shit? I had no idea Balance was as bad as this...

That's 1:30 seconds of the 10 albums worth of material Ed has stashed away in his vault! It's also Ed believing the hype that he's a genius and any noise he makes with an instrument, is the greatest thing ever.

I've never heard that Take Me Back song either. Fucking horrible.

[Nickdfresh]

WTF is this shit? I had no idea Balance was as bad as this...

Me neither, I lost complete interest after having F.U.C.K. bore me to death....

Some sheep at the Links swear the album is a treasure, but FFS it seems awful. I guess Ed was sober and playing well on the tour though....

OMG was Ed pissed at his cat and trying to torture it?

[vandeleur]

There was one song I thought cool riff and solo wonder what dave could have done with it .....
shit title tho ... humans being the song from the wind movie . Although I can't listen to it properly because of the 6th form poetry lyrics.

[Nickdfresh]

Shine on, buddy...

I'll admit it actually is a good song and one of the few good things Van Hagar did...

[Jérôme Frenchise]

The guy knows his stuff so much that he could be a regular poster here.

[Full Bug]

I love this guy...

Yeah, was actually fun to read through all that, he would fit in around here for sure....