The Summer of Kristy

[Kristy]

...is now officially over. Three days early.

What did you government-sponsored cretins do with your 2022 summer? Don't bother for you know no one gives a shit. I bet you celebrated the Fourth with shitty beer, burgers and COVID with self-loathing.


I did a lot of drugs like I said I would. Mainly heavy psychedelics and significant milligram edibles with lawyers from the ACLU to see if I would "freak out" and Boy Howdy did I. Believed I saw the ghost of Marvin Gaye or at least had a intense conversation with the guy.

Betcha did not know ACLU lawyers are sluts. All of them. Good news none of them were transplants so no Texans of Californian twitfarts. Plus, I would never waste good drugs with F A T people


Anyway, did come with some consequences like I think I permanently fucked up my vision and some ataxia issues. Most likely my corpus callosum is fried. I'm not at all concerned not going to live forever.

Planning on doing more drugs @Kristy Mas time

[twonabomber]

Thank goodness you're back. Von was worried sick!

[ZahZoo]

Glad you're back... Von just hasn't been himself since you disappeared?

Did you get an early release for good behavior?

[Nickdfresh]

Praise Jesus! Maybe don't tell your social worker or parole officer you're on the web again...

[ZahZoo]

Praise Jesus! Maybe don't tell your social worker or parole officer you're on the web again...

Our user agreement does clearly state that the site is not responsible for loss of freedom due to parole or probation violations...

I believe it's in the Use by Degenerates section.

[Terry]

Our user agreement does clearly state that the site is not responsible for loss of freedom due to parole or probation violations...

I believe it's in the Use by Degenerates section.

Goddamned fine print.

[Kristy]

Thank goodness you're back. Von was worried sick!

Von was welcome to come to Bailey, he fit right in with all the MAGA weeds in that shitty mountain town. Although seeing him doing mushrooms with liberals would be trip in itself.

[Kristy]

Praise Jesus! Maybe don't tell your social worker or parole officer you're on the web again...

Can I just do drugs in peace?


Geesh~

[Kristy]

By the way, here's my The Summer of Kristy drug-induced song list. No, you will not find it on Suckafy, Pandumpa, or Amazlam Music. Why? Simply because if you subscribe to one of those music-destroying corporate monoliths to "stream" on your over-priced shitty phone which will be burned in a fire pit in India in the next year you're a fucking idiot. Music and drugs should be kicked old school and no, I don't mean vinyl because vinyl is for hipster pussies who think The Righteous Brothers are still relevant. What you do is transfer the vinyl to digital and act too stupid to notice the god damn irony. So blow me with a popsicle stick

So...does it suck? Probably. But I'm way cooler than all of you.


Jon Bedda - Tangiers
Sandie Shaw- Nothing Less Than Brilliant


Yeah, I know. She's a limey but what can you do?

Where was I?

Air Formation - Slow You Down
Not Plain Jane - Symmetry
Dr. Hook - Sharing The Night Together
Santana - Hold On
On Off Man - Baroque
Street Fever - In Your Lungs
Pindrops - Reflection II
Glaare - Mirrors
Dead Serpent - Destruction
Time for Dreams - Death To All Actors
Camper Van Beethoven - Pictures of Matchstick Men
Barry Manilow with Mel Torme - Big City Blues
Frank Sinatra w/Antônio Carlos Jobim- Once I Loved
Logic Stories - Interstellar
The Hollies- He Ain't F A T, He's My Brother
William Orbit - A Touch Of The Night
Mark Allen Smith - Skeleton Fight
Mystic Braves - Shads of Gray
Tami Nelson - Call Your Mama
Billy Fury - Wondrous Place
Marcos Valio - Batucuda Surglu
Jack Rabbit Smith - Speed of Love
Yola - Faraway Look
Jackie Gleason & His Orchestra - Melancholy Serenade
Mitch & Mickey - A Kiss At The End Of The Rainbow
Don Dixon - Praying Mantis
Love & Rockets - Saudade
Hugo Montenegro - Don't You Worry About A Thing
David Bowie - Golden Years
Sheldon Allman - Radioactive Mama
Fastball - Holding The Devil's Hand
Jolie & The Jackalopes - She's Too High


Bebo & The Goodtime Boys - Let The Fun Begin
Skeewiff - For A Few Beats More
Joe Henry - Flesh & Blood
Bobby Hebb - Where Are You
Mark & The Mirrors - Hypnotic
Morgan James - Give You Up




Where was I?

Tennis (local band) - Need Your Love
Herb Albert & The Tijuana Brass - Hurts So Good
Radost Moja - Ljubi Menja, Ljubi
The Last Drive - Every Night
Lee Baker - Take It From Me
Lyn Avalon - I Walk The Streets
Whiskey Daredevils - Susan Instead
Carl Lester & The Showstoppers - When You See Me Hurt
Pokey LaFarge - Something In The Water
Melanie - Brand New Key
Bobby Caldwell- Please Be Kind
Chris Joss - The Man With The Suitcase
Vittoria Fleet - Stage Whsiper
Venus In Ares - Heart In A Machine
Tpisy - Lipstick Tree
Mademoiselle Nineteen - Je Ne Vois Que Vous


Marc Almond - Shadows & Reflections
Nelson Riddle - Your Zowie Face
Piney Gir - Puppy Love
The Moons - Today
Jack Jones - Wives & Lovers
The James Hunter Six - This Is Where We Came In
April March - Zero Zero
Dorothy Lamour - The One Rose That's Left In My Heart
Jack Webb - Stranger In Town


The Baseballs - Love On The Brain
The Nude Party - Paper Trail (Money)
The Ugly Beats - Things I Need To Know
The Real Gone Tones - Stick With It
Robert Maxwell - Fly Me To The Moon
The Bird & The Bee - Jamie's Cryin'
Trees Speak - Interference
Coconut Shampoo - Neverever
Quincy Jones- Hang On Sloopy
Trini Lopez - Unchain My Heart
The Heardsman - She Knows It
Memphis Slim - Steppin' Out
The Reasoners - Dull Today
DeVotchka & The Mychael Danna - First Push
Suzi Chunk - I Can't Stand Mirrors
The Galileo 7 - Slipping Away
The Rolling Stones - Ain't No Use In Crying
Cilla Black - I Only Live To Love You
Holly Golightly - Without You Here


Juliet Roberts - High On A Feeling
Orville Peck - Winds Change
The Zanes - The Blob
Nancy Wilson - Call Me
The Blues Brothers - I Don't Know
Henry Mancini - Flamingo
The Brady Bunch - It's Sunshine Day
The Cramps - Goo Goo Muck
Peter Bruntell - Dinosaur
Tami Nelson - Cry Over You
Gary McFarland - Satisfaction
Blue Tofu - Hunger Tango
Clan Of Xymox - Muscovite Mosquito (4AD Mix)



There's more but the point being I'm much cooler than all of you

[Kristy]

By the way slave Lake Erie SESH mind-control corporate/subliminal fascism only allows 5 vids.

That Tami Neilson is the real-fucking-deal (for a F A T T Y)

[FORD]

Think I recognized at least one song in that long list....

[Kristy]

Not surprising when you live chronically in 1984.

[FORD]

That's ridiculous. 1996 maybe. Not 1984.

Music - like all other forms of media - was seriously damaged by Bill Clinton's ridiculous Telecommunications Act of 1996. And there's been very few bands worth talking about since then.

Except for 3rd Secret. They're alright.

[Kristy]

Horse Hockey

Clinton killed radio, Apple killed music in 2001

[FORD]

Clinton's bill also allowed the consolidation of the record industry. Once it was under 5 conglomerates, they didn't sign anybody who wasn't a Disney bubblegum singer, cookie cutter rap posers, or right wing propaganda "country" singers.

The greedy pig bastards at the record labels may well blame Apple for itunes or Napster, and later on they would blame it on Pandora or Spotify, but the bottom line is.... you can't expect to sell records, if you aren't releasing anything worth buying.

The disposable corporate music lends itself to the iTunes model, because even the people dumb enough to pay for this shitty music in a lossy mp3 format will only pay for the one song that would have previously been released as a "single".

[Mushroom]

Think I recognized at least one song in that long list....

There's a reason why you don't... most of that music is shit. Kristy is tryin to be edgy forcin herself to listen to mediocre music (she doesn't know that).

[Fairwrning]

Not surprising when you live chronically in 1984.

That's 78-84 around here, mister.

[Kristy]

There's a reason why you don't... most of that music is shit. Kristy is tryin to be edgy forcin herself to listen to mediocre music (she doesn't know that).

Jack Webb and Mel Torme is "edgy"?

[Mushroom]

Jack Webb and Mel Torme is "edgy"?

I didn't say they were edgy. You read in haste after that last bong hit. You're listening to old hag music.

[Kristy]

The only thing here that is old is you, grandpa. You have a homoerotic fixation on a irrelevant rock star from 40 years ago Why so bitter? Did AARP cancel your bingo night?

[Hardrock69]

Jack Webb and Mel Torme is "edgy"?

Apparently YOU think so, Hagatha.

[Kristy]

You're one to speak, Kirsten.

[Nickdfresh]

Summer of masturbating to K-Pop girls. (Or dudes for Von)...

[Nitro Express]

Clinton's bill also allowed the consolidation of the record industry. Once it was under 5 conglomerates, they didn't sign anybody who wasn't a Disney bubblegum singer, cookie cutter rap posers, or right wing propaganda "country" singers.

The greedy pig bastards at the record labels may well blame Apple for itunes or Napster, and later on they would blame it on Pandora or Spotify, but the bottom line is.... you can't expect to sell records, if you aren't releasing anything worth buying.

The disposable corporate music lends itself to the iTunes model, because even the people dumb enough to pay for this shitty music in a lossy mp3 format will only pay for the one song that would have previously been released as a "single".

There really is no music industry as we knew it. Sure people will still make music and perform it but it will be smaller scale. Without a big promotion machine the big money is just not going to be there neither will there be the Incentive for people to try and make it. The volume you would have to sell streaming to make any real money is huge. One argument is you can reach more people online worldwide but how are they going to know about you without any marketing or promotion? What the labels and media provided was the marketing and promotion.

[Nickdfresh]

There really is no music industry as we knew it. Sure people will still make music and perform it but it will be smaller scale. Without a big promotion machine the big money is just not going to be there neither will there be the Incentive for people to try and make it. The volume you would have to sell streaming to make any real money is huge. One argument is you can reach more people online worldwide but how are they going to know about you without any marketing or promotion? What the labels and media provided was the marketing and promotion.

I don't everything but the fundamentals are still there and fucking good riddance anyways to the old "music industry". They raped artists repeatedly and really the same denominator is that the real money is in the touring and not in making albums. The money only sparingly went to big acts anyway. But I could give a fuck about Don Henley's retirement fund at this point. Look at that Uncle Milty's nephew cunt that totally fucked Van Halen on their first contract. Really not sad if fucking dicks like that dont have a job anymore...

[Nickdfresh]

Where is Bg Train anyways...

[Kristy]

See what happens when you take drugs all summer. Forgot my theme song - maybe so due to the fact Paul Weller is a total fucking asshole.



Welcome to the "most exclusive club' of limey retards, indeed.

[Kristy]

It's back! Last week of June I'm going back to Bailey to do nothing but drugs for 5 weeks straight.




Did I mention that I love drugs? And summer? And doing drugs in summer?

[Von Halen]

Loser!

[Nickdfresh]

Loser!

LMFAO!

[Nitro Express]

I don't everything but the fundamentals are still there and fucking good riddance anyways to the old "music industry". They raped artists repeatedly and really the same denominator is that the real money is in the touring and not in making albums. The money only sparingly went to big acts anyway. But I could give a fuck about Don Henley's retirement fund at this point. Look at that Uncle Milty's nephew cunt that totally fucked Van Halen on their first contract. Really not sad if fucking dicks like that dont have a job anymore...

It all revolved around radio. You only had a few choices so local radio stations were heavy influencers. Many bands got their break from a local DJ. Radio as we knew it is gone.

[Kristy]

Loser!

As usual, you're invited, Von. But be warned, you'll be doing drugs with some rich asshole liberals (well, two of them) but the upshot is they love guns. They bring along their guns and bitch a lot about the government - like you do. You'd fit right in.

[Nitro Express]

It's back! Last week of June I'm going back to Bailey to do nothing but drugs for 5 weeks straight.




Did I mention that I love drugs? And summer? And doing drugs in summer?

Don’t get mauled by a bear.

[Kristy]

Let's see:

I have my drugs
My playlist
Plenty of food and water
My uber rich liberal friends

And then comes a summons in the mail for jury duty. Motherfucker.

[Kristy]

Well, I managed to get out of jury duty (told them I was mentally unstable and guess what, they believed me).

Begins of what else? First day of summer.


See you suckers on the other side

[FORD]

I finally got a jury duty notice last year, for the county court. Then I got a notice for the city court the same week. I used the county notice as an excuse to get out of the city jury duty. Then the ridiculous post-Covid procedure for the county jury was to dial a telephone number every night for a week or so, to see if my "number" was picked. My number was 30 something, and by the time they got to 20 they had their jurors. So it was like the equivalent of getting the high lottery number in the Vietnam war draft, or something.

I wasn't really looking forward to being on a jury, but slightly pissed of that they wait this long to ask me, and then make me wait around all week for nothing.

[Von Halen]

Well, I managed to get out of jury duty (told them I was mentally unstable and guess what, they believed me).

Uh, you are mentally unstable.

[Nickdfresh]

[Kristy]

Uh, you are mentally unstable.

You're too kind, Von.

[Terry]

I finally got a jury duty notice last year, for the county court. Then I got a notice for the city court the same week. I used the county notice as an excuse to get out of the city jury duty. Then the ridiculous post-Covid procedure for the county jury was to dial a telephone number every night for a week or so, to see if my "number" was picked. My number was 30 something, and by the time they got to 20 they had their jurors. So it was like the equivalent of getting the high lottery number in the Vietnam war draft, or something.

I wasn't really looking forward to being on a jury, but slightly pissed of that they wait this long to ask me, and then make me wait around all week for nothing.

Meh. I don't mind jury duty. Have been summoned several times. Never got to the point in the voir dire where I was even questioned because a panel had already been selected before it was my turn to be asked anything. I get if people need to be excused because of a legitimate reason. I just figure it's my civic duty.