New Roth Show episode

[Nitro Express]

Okay, I am on currently 60mg of Wana Gummies and higher than a god damn satellite right now so I will not remember writing any of this (cast with most of my postings) but here is my review of the Roth Show thus far this season.

It really three simple points to one simple question:

1. Who is this for?


1. Roth's current audience? Which is what, middle-aged white males who vote Trump and love to kill helpless animals. Roth is not bringing in the youngins like Ted Nugent can nor do much women listen to him. There no Millennial retard out there who gives one single fuck as to who Roth is/was. The "Z'ers" or what the fuck ever they go by have already had much of their collective grey matter shrinking due to K Pop, Joe Rogan, Pinko liberalism and its pseudo-socialist politics to fart out Roth Name.

2. Roth's ego? Here we go. No question Roth is a narcissistic asshole who masturbates into a frenzy to every time to a hit song by the Thomson Twins which in itself raises a question within a question. What decade of Roth's ego? The present: boring grandad stories of going to shitholes in Japan and South America to hunt endangered wildlife and butt-fuck the local pygmy population and turn them into plasticized Californian veneer for the Illuminati. The past? That alone raises a question within a question withing a question. What decade? The present: Roth is slowing losing his cognitive skills to approaching dementia and grand dad boredom. The Van Halen years? Oh, fuck that. Roth will pity-poty himself over guilt over Eddie that belongs within a therapist office and not a god damn podcast or Roth will pull a frontman Spandex-wedgie inverted buttfucking himself on how great it was with the broads, coke and all that fucking money. A lot of fucking money buys you a lot of broads and coke and coke leads to dementia and dementia leads to podcast. Childhood Roth: Bingo! Murray The K and Wolfman Jackoff lived inside Roth teenage peroxide-soaked skull in the 60s paying low-rent while "Bull-Fucking" himself in the 3-way with Wolfie and K jerk off to music of the Thompson Twins. Roth has resorted back to his childhood traumas and we are to be his therapist and try to suck his grand dad cock back into his "safe zone" and recycled guilt trips about Eddie. Sing me some Marvin, you Diamonnd studded four-star halo and I'll masturbate to Morrissey whipping me with gladioli dipped in Crisco and salt...ahhhh....ahhhhh...


Right? where was I?

Oh yeah, 10 year-old Roth. Back when he touched a "boobie" for the first time and then to autofelliciate himself in abysmal failure. Dude needed to start a band and dude needed to write da lyriz and dude needs a rich daddy to buy him rich daddy shit of a PA to start a band now that he written the words. Roth once wrote a song about the social dangers of bringing [your] whiskey home to the point where da womaz no longer allow for you to touch boobie. Roth was a clairvoyant but too stupid to ever realize it. So now we how come full circle and I don't know you but I feel a Eddy self-guilt victimhood should have been meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, man rimjob trip on the next episode.


3. I forget. Look, all that matters here is the slave FORD works for Koch Industries and is a double-agent to the Roth Cause. You know the Roth Cause, right? Certainty not slave FORD and his Puke Yugur/C.I.A. mindcontrol Agenda 21 we all know the moon landing is fake, FEMA camp globalist (and RuZZKie) propaganda his post on this otherwise beautiful largely middle-aged white male respectable neighborhood.


Fuck, I'm really high.

Pot tends to lead to blabber mouth and junk food munching. Roth was popular at the time because he represented a big Fuck You! to society. Add in whatever talent the band spewed and there you go.

Roth hasn’t changed he’s just a dated relic of what we found amusing when we were 12 years old.

Anyways now we know why Ed Van Halen crawled into the bottle and stayed there. He had Roth and Valerie to deal with. What a nightmare.

[ZahZoo]

I don't even know what to say...

I hear ya... some may call it being artistic... or just the old fucker needs something to do other than playing dress up-dance party and making a bunch of racket around the house in the middle of the night...

His neighbors must be enthused...

[Vinnie Velvet]

Pot tends to lead to blabber mouth and junk food munching. Roth was popular at the time because he represented a big Fuck You! to society. Add in whatever talent the band spewed and there you go.

Roth hasn’t changed he’s just a dated relic of what we found amusing when we were 12 years old.

Anyways now we know why Ed Van Halen crawled into the bottle and stayed there. He had Roth and Valerie to deal with. What a nightmare.

Val must have been ten times worse.

[Vinnie Velvet]

I hear ya... some may call it being artistic... or just the old fucker needs something to do other than playing dress up-dance party and making a bunch of racket around the house in the middle of the night...

His neighbors must be enthused...

Why not make a No Holds BBQ Part II?

[Seshmeister]

Back then I think i came up with a theory that BBQ Part 1 was all a tax related thing whereby his accountant had told him that he would get to write off property tax bills if he could show the old Roth mansion was actually a movie set essential to his art.

I say that as someone with absolutely no knowledge of US/Ca tax laws but maybe it's just that happening again 20+ years on.

[Nitro Express]

Back then I think i came up with a theory that BBQ Part 1 was all a tax related thing whereby his accountant had told him that he would get to write off property tax bills if he could show the old Roth mansion was actually a movie set essential to his art.

I say that as someone with absolutely no knowledge of US/Ca tax laws but maybe it's just that happening again 20+ years on.

Naw. That neighborhood isn’t zoned for that and Pasadena is anal about zoning.

[Nitro Express]

Why not make a No Holds BBQ Part II?

Why not make porn?

[Nitro Express]

Anyways it will give Sam something else to cry about Dave on social media and the lame ass pod casts he can’t stay off of.

[twonabomber]

Are those mutton chops?

At least Dave is in shape. Sammy's F A T!

Cocaine is a helluva drug.

[Von Halen]

Fuck, I'm really high.

Obviously.

Really high and mentally ill. What a combination.

[Von Halen]

Anyways now we know why Ed Van Halen crawled into the bottle and stayed there. He had Roth and Valerie to deal with. What a nightmare.

Poor Ed. Roth, Val and then that fucking Clichegar. It's amazing he almost made it full circle to reunite the entire original 4.

[Nitro Express]

Are those mutton chops?

At least Dave is in shape. Sammy's F A T!

Cocaine is a helluva drug.

Sam just can’t enjoy his money. He has to go on every two bit podcast and tell the world how great he is. The guy is the poster child for insecurity. Even when Ed was all fucked up he was onto Sam. He was onto what a self-serving cunt he is.

[Nickdfresh]

Sam just can’t enjoy his money. He has to go on every two bit podcast and tell the world how great he is. The guy is the poster child for insecurity. Even when Ed was all fucked up he was onto Sam. He was onto what a self-serving cunt he is.

He always had a giant inferiority complex when it came to Dave. Can't blame him though but maybe therapy would help...

[Nitro Express]

He always had a giant inferiority complex when it came to Dave. Can't blame him though but maybe therapy would help...

Yeah but being that way in 2023? Sam is just pissed he failed at stealing Dave’s legacy. Van Hagar will not be remembered like Classic Van Halen will be and that just drives Sam nuts. Oh well. Let him look foolish dissing Dave.

Dave probably was always the dude dancing in front of a mirror. The thing is there was no You Tube back then. The guy is eccentric but in his younger years he could bring it.

Anyways Van Halen was a happy accident. You had all the right elements come together and Dave was a good PR face for the band.

[Terry]

Poor Ed. Roth, Val and then that fucking Clichegar. It's amazing he almost made it full circle to reunite the entire original 4.

I'm sure when Ed was drinking most of the day and ballasting that out with cocaine (during his binge period of...you know, the late 1970s to 2006), doubtless he was a pleasure to deal with 100% of the time.

I can see where Dave's motormouth and showman attitude could get insufferable at times, but let's not paint Ed to be the calm inside the storm here.