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A Van Halen timeline:
1975: Of all the bands in L.A., Van Halen is the loudest.
1978: Van Halen's debut album is cleverly titled: "Van Halen."
1979: The band transports 22 tons of equipment on a 10-month tour. But it's only four tons when you subtract the drugs and alcohol.
1980: David Lee Roth is Van Ailin' after a flying-squirrel leap into some hanging stage lights.
1981: Eddie Van Halen marries Valerie Bertinelli, who is famous for not being Mackenzie Phillips.
1983: Roth is not thrilled when Eddie plays on Michael Jackson's "Beat It."
1984: Millions leap to buy "Jump," the gleeful-sounding single that pronounces, "You might as well jump."
1985: Roth quits, opening the door for Sammy (Van) Hagar.
1986: "Why Can't This Be Love" contains the line: "Only time will tell if we stand the test of time." So true.
1989: The leads of "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" admit they "will never be a super band until we have Eddie Van Halen on guitar."
1991: Eddie and Val name their son Wolfgang because they don't want him to be teased or anything.
1996: Hagar is Van Bailin' after the guys asks Roth to record a song with them.
1998: Gary Cherone becomes the band's third lead singer -- for about 13 minutes.
1999: This just in from the Van Halen News Desk: 46 percent of fans want Roth as lead singer; 40 percent prefer Hagar.
2001: The marriage is Van Failin'; Eddie and Valerie split.
2004: Hagar buries the bitterness, returns for a second helping of Van Hagar.
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