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WARF,
I'll second your nominations... I think back in the day, you were nominated/inducted based on the body of work you built in the forums in support of Classic Van Halen and David Lee Roth. Taking down the arguments of Hagaritas and basically "representin' the cause" determined your candidacy. One of the first requirements, if I recall correctly, was that you had to have seen Van Halen live (do I really need to qualify this as CLASSIC VAN HALEN with DAVID LEE ROTH pre-1986)... of course, this requirement would limit E.U.A.S. to the Old Boy Club, so I think that requirement was short-lived.
Thus, WARF, without further ado...
New Entrance Exam Requirements For E.U.A.S. Membership...
Over the years, we've amassed tens of thousands of registered users here at the David Lee Roth Army, of which a couple thousand or so are "active." Of those who are active, perhaps 250 even know who David Lee Roth is. As a result, we are planning to institute a new requirement designed to ensure only users who have a GED-level understanding of Van Halen and David Lee Roth receive candidacy preference for E.U.A.S.
This proficiency exam will consist of 10 areas/disciplines/open-ended questions for which you must demonstrate basic knowledge or devotion to Van Halen and DLR. Once we have reviewed your answers and you achieve a score of at least 90%, consider yourself an official member in good standing upon receipt of your E.U.A.S. ID Card.
Here is a representative sample of questions:
1) What does E.U.A.S. stand for? (Duh)
2) Names (birth and legal) of the original members of Van Halen
3) Original major label and year of signing
4) List the "Seven Pack" and release dates (year is sufficient)
5) List all instrumentals from the "Seven Pack"
6) List all DLR solo releases (extra credit for side projects, charities, guest appearances)
7) Name of DLR's book: "Outta Love Again," "Push Comes To Shove," "House Of Pain," or "Crazy From The Heat"
8) Copy of your first Van Halen concert ticket stub (if you are too young - pre-1986 - a parent's ticket stub will do)
9) Photos of you at a Van Halen concert, sporting Van Halen gear, DLR tattoos, etc
10) YouTube video of you giving a clinic or playing a Van Halen song (karaoke ineligible)
Extra credit will be awarded to the parents of children named after albums, songs, lyrics, and/or band members of Van Halen and David Lee Roth. Additional points will be awarded for free-form essays on a) the influence of classical, blues, and The Kinks on Van Halen music; b) detailed examination of the results of drinking, smoking, meth, and guitar picks as it relates to tongue cancer; c) why wearing a "cup" around Edward Van Halen is important; d) David Lee Roth: Entertainer, Genius, or Man-Child On Permanent Safari; e) a relevant topic of your choosing.
Points will be deducted for references to Sammy Hagar, Gary Cherone, et al.
That is all.
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I'll second your nominations... I think back in the day, you were nominated/inducted based on the body of work you built in the forums in support of Classic Van Halen and David Lee Roth. Taking down the arguments of Hagaritas and basically "representin' the cause" determined your candidacy. One of the first requirements, if I recall correctly, was that you had to have seen Van Halen live (do I really need to qualify this as CLASSIC VAN HALEN with DAVID LEE ROTH pre-1986)... of course, this requirement would limit E.U.A.S. to the Old Boy Club, so I think that requirement was short-lived.
Thus, WARF, without further ado...
New Entrance Exam Requirements For E.U.A.S. Membership...
Over the years, we've amassed tens of thousands of registered users here at the David Lee Roth Army, of which a couple thousand or so are "active." Of those who are active, perhaps 250 even know who David Lee Roth is. As a result, we are planning to institute a new requirement designed to ensure only users who have a GED-level understanding of Van Halen and David Lee Roth receive candidacy preference for E.U.A.S.
This proficiency exam will consist of 10 areas/disciplines/open-ended questions for which you must demonstrate basic knowledge or devotion to Van Halen and DLR. Once we have reviewed your answers and you achieve a score of at least 90%, consider yourself an official member in good standing upon receipt of your E.U.A.S. ID Card.
Here is a representative sample of questions:
1) What does E.U.A.S. stand for? (Duh)
2) Names (birth and legal) of the original members of Van Halen
3) Original major label and year of signing
4) List the "Seven Pack" and release dates (year is sufficient)
5) List all instrumentals from the "Seven Pack"
6) List all DLR solo releases (extra credit for side projects, charities, guest appearances)
7) Name of DLR's book: "Outta Love Again," "Push Comes To Shove," "House Of Pain," or "Crazy From The Heat"
8) Copy of your first Van Halen concert ticket stub (if you are too young - pre-1986 - a parent's ticket stub will do)
9) Photos of you at a Van Halen concert, sporting Van Halen gear, DLR tattoos, etc
10) YouTube video of you giving a clinic or playing a Van Halen song (karaoke ineligible)
Extra credit will be awarded to the parents of children named after albums, songs, lyrics, and/or band members of Van Halen and David Lee Roth. Additional points will be awarded for free-form essays on a) the influence of classical, blues, and The Kinks on Van Halen music; b) detailed examination of the results of drinking, smoking, meth, and guitar picks as it relates to tongue cancer; c) why wearing a "cup" around Edward Van Halen is important; d) David Lee Roth: Entertainer, Genius, or Man-Child On Permanent Safari; e) a relevant topic of your choosing.
Points will be deducted for references to Sammy Hagar, Gary Cherone, et al.
That is all.
Icon©℗™
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