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Thread: For the joke thread where ever it went

  1. #1
    Watch me fuck this up....
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    For the joke thread where ever it went

    Subject: Good old Wal Mart


    One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him," My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor."

    "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten
    seconds and costs ten dollars...a lot cheaper than a doctor."

    So Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.

    "Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart."

    That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool
    sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure. Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the
    results.

    The computer prints the following:

    1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
    2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
    3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
    4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
    5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.

    "Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart."
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  2. #2
    YankeeRose
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    LOFL...
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  3. #3
    Roadie

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    Here's a really bad joke.....

    What goes CLACK-CLACK-BOOM! CLACK-CLACK-BOOM!??


    An Amish drive-by.
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  4. #4
    Sweet Talkin' Ladies Man
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    It's right here.

    Joke thread
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