What's the craziest thing you ever did to show your hatred of all things Van Hagar? Here's mine...
Back in 1991, shortly after the release of Carnal Knowledge, my buddy and I were getting ready to go out for a spell, and he called me up and told me that he had something kinda "special" planned. I had no idea, and he wouldn't tell me over the phone, so I busted over to his place and discovered that he'd put together a large banner reading something to the effect of "LONG LIVE VAN HALEN 1978-1984...MAY THEY FOREVER RULE THE WORLD OF ROCK, AND MAY THEY ALWAYS BE REMEMBERED. FUCK HAGAR!" or something to that effect.
Anyway, he had a bunch of candles, and we came up with a whole funeral sermon and framed up some oversized pictures of David, Ed, Mike and Al. The sermon was a standard funeral speech, speaking of the good times and how sad the current state of affairs had become. Of course, being the practicing musicians that we were, coming up with a PA wasn't any real difficulty....
At first, it was going to be a local neighborhood public funeral, but I decided that we couldn't keep it that simple...I mean, Jesus, we were celebrating the life and times of Van Halen, a band gone before it's time!! We needed to take that shit out to the freeway!!
Which is exactly what we did. Pulled off the main road to a parking lot, walked up and posted the banner up so that anyone driving by in rush hour traffic could hear it and see it, and then proceeded to give Van Halen a proper memorial. After about ten minutes of playing classic era VH and speaking about the high moments, we got word from a kind passerby that he heard the cops talking about us over his scanner and that they were on their way, so....
"Well, folks - we gotta go! But remember...though the REAL Van Halen may be gone, their lasting legacy will carry you all the days of your lives! Thank you for coming, God bless, and we gotta get the fuck outta here!"
My buddy took his zippo and we set the banner on fire, memorializing Van Halen properly with a cremation and out the door we went
There were a few "Fuck you, guys, Hagar rules!" but they were minimal compared the cheers, clapping and adolation of most of the drivers who caught it. I think I saw more tit flashes from chicks driving by then I've seen since going to the Great White/Dokken concert, lol.
Cops never caught us, either.
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