John Ashcroft
02-14-2005, 12:12 PM
On Saturday, the Democrats passed the unlit torch of the party to somebody else who will attempt to light it with a wet match.
Ex-Vermont governor, and former seeker of the Democrat nomination for president, Howard Dean, is that party's new chairman. Dean's promising to make the party competitive in the South, Midwest and Mountain areas – in other words, he's got to figure out a way they can be fake Republicans by surgically implanting moral-issue silicone enhancements to make the party platform a more attractive rack for red-state voters to grasp.
This will prove to be quite a chore for Dean, and one that's bound to leave him as stressed as Michael Moore's inseam, almost certainly culminating in his premature dismissal, for several reasons.
Grabbing the unlit torch from outgoing chief Terry McAuliffe, whose sales tactics make Mr. Haney from "Green Acres" seem trustworthy by comparison, Dean has to figure out how to get a three-legged donkey up a mile-long, 45-degree rocky embankment with Ted Kennedy on its back. He also has to find a way to ensure that the Dems next presidential nominee isn't an escapee from the "Dukakis Home for the Clinically Unelectable."
Gaining even a modicum of success will require the taking of some risks, but unless the Democrats permit themselves to recognize the true problem (which would require the ability to accept reality, along with a mirror) they're going nowhere. "Risks" implies that there is a chance of success, but lately, the Democrats have been playing Russian roulette with a bullet in all six chambers.
Dean follows Terry McAuliffe, who never quite "got it." After the recall of California's Gray Davis, McAuliffe said, "People are very angry about the course of our nation ... people are worried about their jobs, their health insurance, and they are taking it out on Gray Davis ... and they will take it out on George Bush, too." He was half right.
At that time, Terry McAuliffe unleashed a new Democrat strategy – to somehow try to pave the road to ultimate victory with the asphalt of humiliating defeat. The flawed logic being that Democrats were being punished for Republican mistakes, and, when the time came, Republicans would pay, too. It didn't quite play out that way, and doesn't show any signs of changing in the near future. Under the "McAuliffe Theory of Democrat Gains," if the Republicans get any more incompetent, there won't be a Democrat left in Congress. :D
I like that line!
Howard Dean is taking over the bloody reigns from Terry McAuliffe, who had a hand in turning the Democrats into politics' answer to the Donner-party crossing.
Dean's first problem will be what to do with Bill Clinton, who is Democrat candidate Kryptonite. Clinton endorsed Gore, who lost the quest for the White House before turning himself into Sebastian Cabot's body double. Gore's stock went down, and Clinton's went up. Bill Clinton went to California to "save" Gray Davis from a recall vote, and threw an anvil to the drowning governor, sealing his fate. Davis fell, and Clinton's political stock rose mysteriously higher. Clinton campaigned for John Kerry in Arkansas and Arizona – two swing-state losses. Clinton endorsed several congressional candidates, including Tom Daschle in South Dakota, all of whom were sacked so fast, the only unanswered question was: "Paper or plastic?"
During the 2004 primary season, Howard Dean accepted the endorsement of Al Gore, who is Clinton's "second-hand smoke" when it comes to successful endorsements, and Dean lost the nomination. Now, the loser of the Dems' nomination – who accepted the endorsement of the loser of a presidential election, who was endorsed by a former president who hardly ever endorses a winner – will try to fix the party. Sound like a workable plan?
Amazingly enough, it does to some...
Not long ago, Bill Clinton underwent a quadruple bypass, and Howard Dean may now be figuring out a way to give him a fifth – one that will bypass Clinton completely. When Howard Dean tries to relay to his fellow Democrats that when Bill Clinton is allowed to carry a campaign, it's usually as pall bearer, it will be Dean, not Clinton, who will be put out to pasture. After all, nobody messes with a man like Bill Clinton whose stock is so high – political capital that must have been accumulated by short-selling candidates.
Democrats may think they've passed the torch, but that's something they won't be able to do until they pass the stone. The infamous "Dean scream" is the perfect sound for a party trying to do exactly that, but he'll rankle both Clintons, and be relieved as DNC chair before the 2006 congressional elections.
Link: here (http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=42845)
Ex-Vermont governor, and former seeker of the Democrat nomination for president, Howard Dean, is that party's new chairman. Dean's promising to make the party competitive in the South, Midwest and Mountain areas – in other words, he's got to figure out a way they can be fake Republicans by surgically implanting moral-issue silicone enhancements to make the party platform a more attractive rack for red-state voters to grasp.
This will prove to be quite a chore for Dean, and one that's bound to leave him as stressed as Michael Moore's inseam, almost certainly culminating in his premature dismissal, for several reasons.
Grabbing the unlit torch from outgoing chief Terry McAuliffe, whose sales tactics make Mr. Haney from "Green Acres" seem trustworthy by comparison, Dean has to figure out how to get a three-legged donkey up a mile-long, 45-degree rocky embankment with Ted Kennedy on its back. He also has to find a way to ensure that the Dems next presidential nominee isn't an escapee from the "Dukakis Home for the Clinically Unelectable."
Gaining even a modicum of success will require the taking of some risks, but unless the Democrats permit themselves to recognize the true problem (which would require the ability to accept reality, along with a mirror) they're going nowhere. "Risks" implies that there is a chance of success, but lately, the Democrats have been playing Russian roulette with a bullet in all six chambers.
Dean follows Terry McAuliffe, who never quite "got it." After the recall of California's Gray Davis, McAuliffe said, "People are very angry about the course of our nation ... people are worried about their jobs, their health insurance, and they are taking it out on Gray Davis ... and they will take it out on George Bush, too." He was half right.
At that time, Terry McAuliffe unleashed a new Democrat strategy – to somehow try to pave the road to ultimate victory with the asphalt of humiliating defeat. The flawed logic being that Democrats were being punished for Republican mistakes, and, when the time came, Republicans would pay, too. It didn't quite play out that way, and doesn't show any signs of changing in the near future. Under the "McAuliffe Theory of Democrat Gains," if the Republicans get any more incompetent, there won't be a Democrat left in Congress. :D
I like that line!
Howard Dean is taking over the bloody reigns from Terry McAuliffe, who had a hand in turning the Democrats into politics' answer to the Donner-party crossing.
Dean's first problem will be what to do with Bill Clinton, who is Democrat candidate Kryptonite. Clinton endorsed Gore, who lost the quest for the White House before turning himself into Sebastian Cabot's body double. Gore's stock went down, and Clinton's went up. Bill Clinton went to California to "save" Gray Davis from a recall vote, and threw an anvil to the drowning governor, sealing his fate. Davis fell, and Clinton's political stock rose mysteriously higher. Clinton campaigned for John Kerry in Arkansas and Arizona – two swing-state losses. Clinton endorsed several congressional candidates, including Tom Daschle in South Dakota, all of whom were sacked so fast, the only unanswered question was: "Paper or plastic?"
During the 2004 primary season, Howard Dean accepted the endorsement of Al Gore, who is Clinton's "second-hand smoke" when it comes to successful endorsements, and Dean lost the nomination. Now, the loser of the Dems' nomination – who accepted the endorsement of the loser of a presidential election, who was endorsed by a former president who hardly ever endorses a winner – will try to fix the party. Sound like a workable plan?
Amazingly enough, it does to some...
Not long ago, Bill Clinton underwent a quadruple bypass, and Howard Dean may now be figuring out a way to give him a fifth – one that will bypass Clinton completely. When Howard Dean tries to relay to his fellow Democrats that when Bill Clinton is allowed to carry a campaign, it's usually as pall bearer, it will be Dean, not Clinton, who will be put out to pasture. After all, nobody messes with a man like Bill Clinton whose stock is so high – political capital that must have been accumulated by short-selling candidates.
Democrats may think they've passed the torch, but that's something they won't be able to do until they pass the stone. The infamous "Dean scream" is the perfect sound for a party trying to do exactly that, but he'll rankle both Clintons, and be relieved as DNC chair before the 2006 congressional elections.
Link: here (http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=42845)