View Full Version : Gay Penguins
academic punk
03-01-2005, 10:02 PM
And, no, I'm not talking about lesbian nuns...
anyhoo, discuss freely...Warham, don't get too turned on by this, y'hear?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/4264913.stm
Gay rights activists have protested at a north German zoo's plans to test the sexual orientation of six male penguins which have displayed homosexual traits.
Bremerhaven's Zoo am Meer said it would introduce four extra female penguins from Sweden to the group to see if the males really were gay.
But zoo director Heike Kueck said "gay groups worldwide have been cursing us since that announcement".
The zoo says it just wants to encourage the rare Humboldt penguins to breed.
The males have been observed trying to mate with each other and trying to hatch offspring out of stones.
"We don't know whether the three male pairs are really homosexual or whether they have just bonded because of a shortage of females," said Mrs Kueck, quoted by Germany's Der Spiegel news magazine.
Gay groups insisted that penguins had a right to form couples without human interference, she said.
"Nobody here wants to forcibly separate homosexual couples," she said.
Only one baby Humboldt penguin has been born at the zoo, which has six males and four females, Der Spiegel reports.
JCOOK
03-01-2005, 10:05 PM
"Holy Fucking Faggots Batman!"
Anonymous
03-01-2005, 10:14 PM
Were they doing it in public? I'm an animals rights activist, but if they did, THEY-SHOULD-BE-SHOT! That's not something that little girls should see. Then they get excited, grow up and then tell their boyfriends they should do a threesome with another man, because they get excited when they see a man screwing another.
Not that that has happened to me. Anyway, I dumped her right away.
SHOOT THE FUCKING PENGUINS!
Cheers! :bottle:
academic punk
03-01-2005, 10:18 PM
Yeah! And what about that new book, "Heather has Two Male Homosexual Penguins?"
Kids shouldn't read that! What the hell has happened to the moral values of this country and its penguins since Bush became president, anyway?
Anonymous
03-01-2005, 10:20 PM
I HATE gay penguins. Shoot Heather, too. And Bush, while you're at it. No, wait. I'm against killing irrational creatures. Just shoot Heather and the fucking gay penguins.
Cheers! :bottle:
academic punk
03-01-2005, 10:25 PM
Shoot the penguins??!? Why would you want to maim Opus and his new friend???
Anonymous
03-01-2005, 10:32 PM
First, because I've got nothing better to do. Second... Wait a minute, Opus? You mean, like Opus Gay?
Just shoot the damn fucking thing!
Gay Penguins :gun:
if the Swedish Penguin Bikini Team can't turn 'em on, they're queer.
Fashionable though - they're always dressed right for any formal occasion.
This subject was first covered on the Daily Show a couple of months ago.
Video can be found here (http://www.jakesavin.com/2004/11/11#a133)
Anonymous
03-01-2005, 10:41 PM
Originally posted by FORD
Fashionable though - they're always dressed right for any formal occasion.
'Course they are! They're gay, for Chrissakes!
Gay Penguins :elvis:
academic punk
03-01-2005, 10:41 PM
Lovely...the Daily Show...the FAKE news...beat the BBC to the story.
Fuck, that's scary...
academic punk
03-01-2005, 10:43 PM
This actually does raise a political question though...is being gay a choice, or are you (meaning YOU, Mary Cheney) born that way?
if so, are you a sinner?
if not, then how far off-base is, say, the Pope?
If...ah, forget it...i'm not gonna get worked up about a bunch of queer birds that can't even fucking fly...
ODShowtime
03-01-2005, 11:04 PM
Originally posted by academic punk
The zoo says it just wants to encourage the rare Humboldt penguins to breed.
The males have been observed trying to mate with each other and trying to hatch offspring out of stones.
This is clearly a case of instinctual behavior and a zoo trying to propogate the species. The 'groups' that are raising a stink should shut the fuck up.
JCOOK
03-01-2005, 11:09 PM
We need a costitutional ban on gay penguins before they start trying to marry...
Anonymous
03-01-2005, 11:14 PM
I can suffer gay men. They just leave more women for us, normal people. But gay penguins? I have no interest in female penguins, so of what use are they?
You know what to do.
Cheers! :bottle:
ODShowtime
03-01-2005, 11:31 PM
come on guys, this is a serious subject
Anonymous
03-01-2005, 11:36 PM
Am I not posting serious? What are you implying? Do you wanna start a fight? Happy Birthday, by the way. I'm buying you one at the bar.
Cheers! :bottle:
Coming soon on the Bravo channel....
"Queer Eye for the South Pole" - 5 gay penguins drive across Antarctica in their SUV helping other frozen tundra lifeforms redecorate their ice caves.
JCOOK
03-02-2005, 02:25 AM
This is really a black and white issue.
Nickdfresh
03-02-2005, 07:22 PM
Is OPUS gay?
http://www.cartoonistgroup.com/properties/opus/art_images/opu09_05comp_lr.jpg
Little_Skittles
03-02-2005, 07:34 PM
Didn't it say that they thought maybe they were trying to mate because, "We don't know whether the three male pairs are really homosexual or whether they have just bonded because of a shortage of females," said Mrs Kueck, quoted by Germany's Der Spiegel news magazine. "
Then i'm sorry i dont' remember who said something about this proving if we choose to be gay or are born with it. Go back to ancient sparta, and lesbos, weren't they gay because they spent alotta time together ? Even in prison don't most men turn gay? So maybe it is our choice but subconsciously.
I mean isn't it proven that if your with someone for long enough that you'll love them or at least warm up to them?
Nickdfresh
03-02-2005, 08:11 PM
Originally posted by Little_Skittles
Even in prison don't most men turn gay? So maybe it is our choice but subconsciously.
We'll have to ask JoeThunder about that!
Little_Skittles
03-02-2005, 08:22 PM
hahaha that was mean but i'm still going to laugh sorry joe.
Anonymous
03-02-2005, 09:38 PM
Well, my guess is, if a man 'bonds' with another be it for shortage of females or whatever, he's gay. I really don't have a problem with it, you know, since the more gays there are, the more women there are left. It's the bisexuals that piss me off.
ALAN, however, has patience with neither. He just maims them.
http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/142/069_3639.jpg
Cheers! :bottle:
Anonymous
03-02-2005, 09:40 PM
Originally posted by Nickdfresh
Is OPUS gay?
http://www.cartoonistgroup.com/properties/opus/art_images/opu09_05comp_lr.jpg
Ah... evidence no. 1
Just kill the damn things.
Cheers! :bottle:
Damn, Steve Dallas has aged worse than any comic character in history. He's like the Keith Richards of the two dimensional world.
AND WHY THE FUCK ISN"T THE NEW "OPUS" COMIC IN MY GODDAMNED CORPORATIST NEOCON OWNED PAPER??
BOONDOCKS TOO, GODDAMN IT!
JCOOK
03-02-2005, 11:14 PM
Originally posted by FORD
Damn, Steve Dallas has aged worse than any comic character in history. He's like the Keith Richards of the two dimensional world.
AND WHY THE FUCK ISN"T THE NEW "OPUS" COMIC IN MY GODDAMNED CORPORATIST NEOCON OWNED PAPER??
BOONDOCKS TOO, GODDAMN IT!
Just blame the PCE;)
PCE??
Just because they're gay doesn't make them criminals.
JCOOK
03-02-2005, 11:29 PM
Originally posted by FORD
PCE??
Just because they're gay doesn't make them criminals.
:D
ODShowtime
03-03-2005, 12:18 AM
Originally posted by Imapus Sylicker
Am I not posting serious? What are you implying? Do you wanna start a fight? Happy Birthday, by the way. I'm buying you one at the bar.
Cheers! :bottle:
:D :guzzle:
LoungeMachine
03-03-2005, 02:23 AM
Boondocks is in the PI daily FORD, and Opus every Sunday.....
Fuck the Seattle Times, though. bastards trying to get out of the JOA
The PI is a great rag...
LoungeMachine
03-03-2005, 02:25 AM
This is just taking away the spotlight from The Lobsters.....and you all know it....
Cathedral
03-03-2005, 02:45 AM
Penguins are monogomous, that means they pick a mate and stick with them.
If there is a shortage of Females then we have Penguins without suitable mates.
That doesn't mean their display of gay tendencies is gay at all.
It just says that they formed bonds with each other and are attempting to do what they do, reproduce offspring.
Probem is, since they typically stick with a mate for life the bonds they have formed won't be broken by introducing more females, so they are now trapped in an endless persuit of the impossible.
Also, in the wild, females in colonies with a shortage of males react in the same way. They go through the motions attempting the impossible.
But the zoo already knows this, and apparently feel that it is worth a shot to see how strong those bonds are.
They clearly should have worded their plans way differently.
Gay Groups just don't want to see them go straight and utimately be happy doing what they do naturally.
They're not human for crying out loud, and don't know any better.
BigBadBrian
03-03-2005, 08:31 AM
Originally posted by LoungeMachine
This is just taking away the spotlight from The Lobsters.....and you all know it....
As it should be. The vast majority of lobsters are cooked incorrectly. For shame.
academic punk
03-03-2005, 08:37 AM
Hey! BBB and I AGREE on something!!
BigBadBrian
03-03-2005, 08:54 AM
Originally posted by academic punk
Hey! BBB and I AGREE on something!!
Cheers! :gulp:
Little_Skittles
03-03-2005, 10:22 PM
You might be on to something there cathedral! Doesn't that kinda go back to the whole spartan thing?
academic punk
03-03-2005, 10:47 PM
wow...gay penguins! for real! Nuns Gone Wild!
http://www.mountainpridemedia.org/oitm/issues/1986/12dec1986/nuns.htm
Lesbian Nuns: Breaking Silence
Review
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
by Joe B.
Rachel was a beautiful woman, though all that was visible was her face, constricted by her starched white habit. It was in the second grade and I was in love. This woman radiated goodness, a striking contrast to the nun I had as a teacher the previous year. Sr. Lauraine was a wicked, evil woman, or so it seemed at the time. I cannot imagine any six-year-old who would not be terrified of her. In the eighth grade, Sr. Virginia brought a vitality and life to science that has remained with me to this day. Still later in my education I would learn calculus from a brilliant old woman with a Ph.D. in mathematics who was also a nun, and two computer languages from a nun with a Ph.D. in computer science. A now dead aunt of mine was a nun and I have a sister whom I respect and admire a great deal who is a nun. I am an atheist. My life so far has been filled with nuns.
It was with great interest that I began reading "Lesbian Nuns: Breaking Silence". In this compilation of stories we are treated to everything from the sublime to the ridiculous - from individual searches for purpose and meaning through austerity and asceticism to young women in bridal gowns singing "Veni, Sponsa Christi (Come Spouse of Christ)" at their profession of final vows. This certainly is a queer world we learn about, including: flagellation, chapter of faults, Mother General, stigmata, etc. The stories, contributed by former and current nuns, are mainly reflections on life as a lesbian in the convent, what possessed them to join or remain and the circumstances of departure. The stories are all filled with emotion, much of it anger. Many of the accounts are similar which at times can be tedious.
Many of the women whose stories are presented joined the convent in order to escape a society in which they felt they did not belong. They preferred instead to live in a community comprised exclusively of women, even though ultimately this society was ruled by the patriarchal church. Most of these women entered with a high degree of idealism, living their lives as ascetics, eschewing worldly possessions. Many left the convent angry and in most cases left the church at the same time. Quite often, these women became involved in a deep feminist spirituality. On the other hand, some of the lesbian ex-nuns are still involved with various aspects of organized religion. Also, a few of the stories are from women who have chosen to remain nuns and try to effect change from within. Some of these nuns live on the "outside" with lovers.
Each year brings a decline in the number of women entering the convent. The current pope is doing nothing to solve the dilemma faced by women in the Catholic church today. In fact, he is attacking most of the gains made by women since Vatican II. Hopefully, young women racing the prospect of entering the convent will get a hold of a copy of "Lesbian Nuns: Breaking the Silence" before making that decision. As the title implies, the silence has been broken in more ways than one. This book is an important statement on the condition of women in the church. Unfortunately, as is too often the case, the people who need to read it most will never even hear of it.
Cathedral
03-03-2005, 11:56 PM
Originally posted by Little_Skittles
You might be on to something there cathedral! Doesn't that kinda go back to the whole spartan thing?
I don't know about the Spartans thing, but i did help my daughter do a report on Penguins two years ago.
Knowledge that i thought i'd never use again came flowing out, lol, and i got more to share, just not about their gay lifestyles and fashion preferences.
And none of this reflects on the homosexual activities inherent in humans.
Not even close.
Nickdfresh
03-04-2005, 12:07 AM
I don't think gay penguins should be allowed to marry, they should call it something else like "civil unions."
Originally posted by Nickdfresh
I don't think gay penguins should be allowed to marry, they should call it something else like "civil unions."
You can't cancel the weddings when the tuxedos are already paid for!
Anonymous
03-05-2005, 01:18 AM
Originally posted by academic punk
wow...gay penguins! for real! Nuns Gone Wild!
Screw the text... GIMME THE PICS!
Cheers! :bottle:
Antonella
03-07-2005, 01:06 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! GAY PENGUINS!!!!!!!!HAHAHAHA thats precious....explains why their always so well dressed! Oooh those fucken penguins!!! HEH
academic punk
03-07-2005, 03:24 PM
Originally posted by Antonella
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! GAY PENGUINS!!!!!!!!HAHAHAHA thats precious....explains why their always so well dressed! Oooh those fucken penguins!!! HEH
You really do have to respect someone who gets as much enjoyment from the phrase "gay penguins" as Antonella does...
Five stars!
Anonymous
03-08-2005, 10:18 PM
Well, whadda ya know... You had the same thought I did. I gave her 5 stars for that exact reason! :lol:
I mean, that post cracked me up more than the entire thread, and there are a few precious ones here.
Cheers! :bottle:
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