hELLO YOU NO GOOD BASTARDS,
DICKFACE, HARDER THAN A STEEL DILDO AND WITH MORE MOJO THAN A ROCK HARD BULL'S PENIS IS FINALLY DOING SOMETHING FOR SAMMY FANS.
FUCK IT, I AM GOING TO THROW A CONVENTION THIS WEEKEND FOR SAMMY HAGAR FANS IN GALVESTON TEXAS.
IF YOU ARE A SAMMY FAN, PLEASE FUCKING ATTEND.
I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A WEEKEND JUST DEDICATED TO CELEBRATING SAMMY HAGAR AND HIS HUGE BOILER OF A STOMACH. WE CAN REALLY JUST TALK ABOUT HOW HUGE SAMMY HAGAR IS, HOW MANY #1 HITS HE HAS AND THE FACT THAT HE SOLD 100 MILLION ALBUMS.. OR WHATEVER THE LATEST THING HE IS CLAIMING.
ACTIVITIES FOR THE WEEKEND ARE AS FOLLOWS
1. RAFTING
2. jET SKIING
3. BOATING
4. CANOEING
5. SWIMMING
6. POLE SMOKING
AS A SPECIAL PROMOTION WE ARE GIVING AWAY A DODGE NEON TO THE PERSON WHO CAN "GUESS sAMMY'S WEIGHT" WHATEVER FAN GETS WITHIN 200 POUNDS OF HIS CORRECT WEIGHT.
DINNER WILL BE SERVED SAT NIGHT. I AM CATERING THE EVENT.
WE WILL BE SERVING MY WORLD FAMOUS "CLEVELAND STEAMER WITH HOT SAUCE" RECIPE.
NOW MY LADY FRIENDS.. I ALWAYS THINK ABOUT YOU.
I AM GOING TO BE WEARING THE SPEEDO'S TO FULLY EXPOSE THE "banana HAMMOCK" AND SOME OF YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY GET A CLOSE UP LOOK AT WHY I AM SUCH A LEGEND.
_____This One's For The Ladies______
--Begin for the ladies
oww! my nuts are so huge. oh god they feel like large grapefruits in a sweet pouch
---End for the ladies
____________________________
SO SAMMY FANS, UNGLUE YOURSELVES FROM THE COMPUTER. GRAB THE CHAINSMOKING, CAMEL TOED, BLEACH BLONDE WIFE AND JUMP IN THE CAMARO AND HEAD DOWN TO GALVESTON TEXAS.
TELL YOUR ALCOHOLIC BOSS AT THE GAS STATION (OR CONSTRUCTIONS SITE.. TAKE YOUR PICK)
THAT YOU MIGHT NOT BE BACK AT ALL...
BRING SOME SWIM TRUNKS YOU SORRY SON'S A BITCHES, 'CAUSE YOU WILL FUCKING NEED THEM.
GOODBYE YOU PATHETIC, FAT, SMALL DICKED BASTARDS,
BREASTS,
DICKFACE
"PEOPLE'S M.C."
"DOCTOR OCTOPORNOPUS"
DICKFACE, HARDER THAN A STEEL DILDO AND WITH MORE MOJO THAN A ROCK HARD BULL'S PENIS IS FINALLY DOING SOMETHING FOR SAMMY FANS.
FUCK IT, I AM GOING TO THROW A CONVENTION THIS WEEKEND FOR SAMMY HAGAR FANS IN GALVESTON TEXAS.
IF YOU ARE A SAMMY FAN, PLEASE FUCKING ATTEND.
I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A WEEKEND JUST DEDICATED TO CELEBRATING SAMMY HAGAR AND HIS HUGE BOILER OF A STOMACH. WE CAN REALLY JUST TALK ABOUT HOW HUGE SAMMY HAGAR IS, HOW MANY #1 HITS HE HAS AND THE FACT THAT HE SOLD 100 MILLION ALBUMS.. OR WHATEVER THE LATEST THING HE IS CLAIMING.
ACTIVITIES FOR THE WEEKEND ARE AS FOLLOWS
1. RAFTING
2. jET SKIING
3. BOATING
4. CANOEING
5. SWIMMING
6. POLE SMOKING
AS A SPECIAL PROMOTION WE ARE GIVING AWAY A DODGE NEON TO THE PERSON WHO CAN "GUESS sAMMY'S WEIGHT" WHATEVER FAN GETS WITHIN 200 POUNDS OF HIS CORRECT WEIGHT.
DINNER WILL BE SERVED SAT NIGHT. I AM CATERING THE EVENT.
WE WILL BE SERVING MY WORLD FAMOUS "CLEVELAND STEAMER WITH HOT SAUCE" RECIPE.
NOW MY LADY FRIENDS.. I ALWAYS THINK ABOUT YOU.
I AM GOING TO BE WEARING THE SPEEDO'S TO FULLY EXPOSE THE "banana HAMMOCK" AND SOME OF YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY GET A CLOSE UP LOOK AT WHY I AM SUCH A LEGEND.
_____This One's For The Ladies______
--Begin for the ladies
oww! my nuts are so huge. oh god they feel like large grapefruits in a sweet pouch
---End for the ladies
____________________________
SO SAMMY FANS, UNGLUE YOURSELVES FROM THE COMPUTER. GRAB THE CHAINSMOKING, CAMEL TOED, BLEACH BLONDE WIFE AND JUMP IN THE CAMARO AND HEAD DOWN TO GALVESTON TEXAS.
TELL YOUR ALCOHOLIC BOSS AT THE GAS STATION (OR CONSTRUCTIONS SITE.. TAKE YOUR PICK)
THAT YOU MIGHT NOT BE BACK AT ALL...
BRING SOME SWIM TRUNKS YOU SORRY SON'S A BITCHES, 'CAUSE YOU WILL FUCKING NEED THEM.
GOODBYE YOU PATHETIC, FAT, SMALL DICKED BASTARDS,
BREASTS,
DICKFACE
"PEOPLE'S M.C."
"DOCTOR OCTOPORNOPUS"
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