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Link? You want a link? I'm making this shit up for discussion bitches!
Sarah Silverman is one funny ass person. There you go-I didn't even say chick.
I think for Dave's show to succeed he's going to need a foil - and honest one...that won't kiss his ass.
So as a fan of Dave, I offer this proposal - and hopefully it will get to him somehow: DUDE, try to hire Sarah Silverman as a co-host.
Anyway, that is all. Time to go masterbate to Sarah.
LATER.
SportsHollywood: What event would you like to see included in the Olympics?
SILVERMAN: Impressions.
SportsHollywood: When you play basketball with John Cusack and Bill Fishman, how often do they suggest a game of shirts vs, skins with you, where they wear the shirts?
SILVERMAN: I've never played b-ball with John Cusak, I"ve only played at the court he has in his office. But, yes, that HI-LARIOUS shirts/skins joke is made by some comic genius just about every time I play, and each time I fall to the ground laughing while I piss and shit myself in comic awe.
SportsHollywood: Which do you enjoy more: Getting a basket in front of a crowd or getting a laugh in front of a crowd?
SILVERMAN: They're both great. You can't compare them. What do you like better: cumming on a porn star's back, or watching your first child be born into the world? --See, they're both wonderful.
Sarah prepares to punch out Barbara Walters on The View.
SportsHollywood: Name five Clippers.
SILVERMAN: No.
SportsHollywood: What's your favorite sports movie?
SILVERMAN: Brian's Song. I love when James Caan calls Billy Dee Williams a "******," and Billy Dee laughs his ass off. And then he tells his girlfriend who's also black--I think it was Judy Pace--and she laughs. It shows the truth--that the real meaning of a word is only as powerful or harmless as the emotion behind it. And it's awesome illustration of a friendship without any exposition. Is that a good answer? I'm a jackass.
SportsHollywood: What is the worst sports movie ever made?
SILVERMAN: Schindler's List.
SportsHollywood: Who is your favorite athlete?
SILVERMAN: Muhammad Ali. In his prime he was a funny, smart thinker, untainted by the forces and opinions around him. He's the greatest. And I thought his relationship with Howard Cosell surpassed any in even the best buddy movies.
SportsHollywood: What's in your medicine cabinet?
SILVERMAN: Zoloft, Alesse, tylenol pm, exederin pm, bobby pins, benadryl, your mother's vibrator.
SportsHollywood: Who is your favorite comic?
SILVERMAN: Todd Glass, Steve Martin (on talk shows), Garry Shandling, and, your mother.
SportsHollywood: What's your favorite pizza?
SILVERMAN: Crispy--with mushrooms and peppers. And candy. And your mother.
SportsHollywood: Which do you consider yourself first: Actress, comedienne, writer, basketball player, or Hollywood Square?
SILVERMAN: Fart Machine.
SportsHollywood: Is the casting couch still alive in Hollywood?
SILVERMAN: I don't know. I can't seem to get anyone to blow me.
SportsHollywood: Ever had cybersex?
SILVERMAN: I was cyber-raped. All I could do was revert into my mind and "go away" to another webpage.
Sarah Silverman:
"A couple nights ago, I was licking jelly off my boyfriend's penis . . . and I thought, Oh, my God--I'm turning into my mother!"
"I saw my father naked once . . . But it was okay . . . Because I was soooo young . . . and sooo drunk."
"The writers of Sanford and Son were so brave in bringing their program to television. I mean, working with all those black people!"
"I don't have a problem with gay men. I just don't want to date them"
"So I live in this apartment that's disgusting--it's really dirty. And the kitchen floor is, like, sticky. And I had to do something about it. So finally I went out and bought some, uh, slippers."
Sarah Silverman is one funny ass person. There you go-I didn't even say chick.
I think for Dave's show to succeed he's going to need a foil - and honest one...that won't kiss his ass.
So as a fan of Dave, I offer this proposal - and hopefully it will get to him somehow: DUDE, try to hire Sarah Silverman as a co-host.
Anyway, that is all. Time to go masterbate to Sarah.
LATER.
SportsHollywood: What event would you like to see included in the Olympics?
SILVERMAN: Impressions.
SportsHollywood: When you play basketball with John Cusack and Bill Fishman, how often do they suggest a game of shirts vs, skins with you, where they wear the shirts?
SILVERMAN: I've never played b-ball with John Cusak, I"ve only played at the court he has in his office. But, yes, that HI-LARIOUS shirts/skins joke is made by some comic genius just about every time I play, and each time I fall to the ground laughing while I piss and shit myself in comic awe.
SportsHollywood: Which do you enjoy more: Getting a basket in front of a crowd or getting a laugh in front of a crowd?
SILVERMAN: They're both great. You can't compare them. What do you like better: cumming on a porn star's back, or watching your first child be born into the world? --See, they're both wonderful.
Sarah prepares to punch out Barbara Walters on The View.
SportsHollywood: Name five Clippers.
SILVERMAN: No.
SportsHollywood: What's your favorite sports movie?
SILVERMAN: Brian's Song. I love when James Caan calls Billy Dee Williams a "******," and Billy Dee laughs his ass off. And then he tells his girlfriend who's also black--I think it was Judy Pace--and she laughs. It shows the truth--that the real meaning of a word is only as powerful or harmless as the emotion behind it. And it's awesome illustration of a friendship without any exposition. Is that a good answer? I'm a jackass.
SportsHollywood: What is the worst sports movie ever made?
SILVERMAN: Schindler's List.
SportsHollywood: Who is your favorite athlete?
SILVERMAN: Muhammad Ali. In his prime he was a funny, smart thinker, untainted by the forces and opinions around him. He's the greatest. And I thought his relationship with Howard Cosell surpassed any in even the best buddy movies.
SportsHollywood: What's in your medicine cabinet?
SILVERMAN: Zoloft, Alesse, tylenol pm, exederin pm, bobby pins, benadryl, your mother's vibrator.
SportsHollywood: Who is your favorite comic?
SILVERMAN: Todd Glass, Steve Martin (on talk shows), Garry Shandling, and, your mother.
SportsHollywood: What's your favorite pizza?
SILVERMAN: Crispy--with mushrooms and peppers. And candy. And your mother.
SportsHollywood: Which do you consider yourself first: Actress, comedienne, writer, basketball player, or Hollywood Square?
SILVERMAN: Fart Machine.
SportsHollywood: Is the casting couch still alive in Hollywood?
SILVERMAN: I don't know. I can't seem to get anyone to blow me.
SportsHollywood: Ever had cybersex?
SILVERMAN: I was cyber-raped. All I could do was revert into my mind and "go away" to another webpage.
Sarah Silverman:
"A couple nights ago, I was licking jelly off my boyfriend's penis . . . and I thought, Oh, my God--I'm turning into my mother!"
"I saw my father naked once . . . But it was okay . . . Because I was soooo young . . . and sooo drunk."
"The writers of Sanford and Son were so brave in bringing their program to television. I mean, working with all those black people!"
"I don't have a problem with gay men. I just don't want to date them"
"So I live in this apartment that's disgusting--it's really dirty. And the kitchen floor is, like, sticky. And I had to do something about it. So finally I went out and bought some, uh, slippers."
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