Is this a fucking joke?

[WARF]

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

http://www.redrocker.com/index.php?s=news_detail&id=93

I knew Sammy was a terrible lyricist.... but not this fucking bad!

[WARF]

Thank-god

I also noticed that Sammy is starting to lose his voice finally!!!

[Diamondjimi]

Food for sheep !

FLUSH !

[WARF]

Seriously... when I saw the Dr. Suess Tubbyboy picture I thought it was a photoshop joke.... but Sam's for real... he really knows how to top himself with shitty songs and albums!

[MAX]

Aiiiight, first of all, Brother Warf, a question. Why or how did you find that clip? :confused: Secondly, I shouldn't say anything cos I actually turned it on for about fifteen seconds. I had to shut it off when I heard The Round Rocker rip Dave off (yet again) by calling himself the "Ice Cream Man" in that clip.

HOW, HOW can some people SERIOUSLY like that guy? They're fucked in the head. That shit 'tis beyond terrible.

Hagar... What a fag. :rolleyes:

[FORD]

This song seems like "Little White Lie part 2" to me.

He's not nearly as pissed off this time, but the lyrics -cheesy as they are - are obviously aimed at Eddie.

[MAX]

WARF or FORD, if either of you can stomach it, that song more than deserves another one of your lyrical rewrites. ;)

"I'm a fat mother fucker, a no talent wonder, a slob totin' blubber, that's Spam I am..."

[yah]

This song is a commercial for this guy....I can't believe how awful it is...especially for us non Hag fans

[FORD]

It's even worse when you actually look at the horrid lyrics......

Sam I Am

Tried to be your paper boy
Tried to be your boy scout
Tried to be your ice cream man
I could not be your soldier
Or even drive your bus
My skills weren't always that obvious

Yeah, but I hope you understand
I'll do the best I can
I ain't no perfect man but Sam I am

I'm a back-talkin' fighter
A silver bullet biter
I'm a flip flop slider
And a guitar moonlighter
I'm your prove it all nighter
Your holy ghost writer
Pale of shade whiter
I'm your rock n roll driver oh yeah oh yeah
That's all I am

I Tried to be your oil man
Tried to be your big boss
Tried to be your broker but you took a loss
It's just a hopeless case
And I ain't no lawyer
I only got a few tricks I can show ya

And I hope you understand it
I'll do the best I can
I ain't no Superman but Sam I am..and I'm

A feel good doctor
A big bad talker
After midnight walker
Sittin on the bay docker

I'm a sunshine stalker
Hodaddy wave watcher
Heaven's door knocker
Blue, white, and red rocker oh yeah oh yeah
That's all I am

I tried to be everything to you
Yeah, but it would not would not do
I got nothin on my resume
But I can rock you and roll you each and every day
Have mercy on me
I am not sorry
Believe me, it's easy
I'll do my best to be a

Straight shot shooter
A bad motor scooter
Sunny honeymooner
Your heavy metal crooner
Make you wanna holler
Shirt with no collar
Wish I was a couple inches taller
White, blue, and red rocker oh yeah oh yeah

Uh I say yeah, yeah, yeah

That's all I am...
That's all I am...
Baby, baby, baby...Sam I Am.

:cheese: :hagar1:

[FORD]

Originally posted by MAX
WARF or FORD, if either of you can stomach it, that song more than deserves another one of your lyrical rewrites. ;)

"I'm a fat mother fucker, a no talent wonder, a slob totin' blubber, that's Spam I am..."

Maybe you should try it yourself, since you manged one line already.

Nothing there inspires me. It's just that weak of material even by Hagar standards. :(

[MAX]

Originally posted by FORD
Tried to be your ice cream man


At least in his old age, he's FINALLY admitting that he "tried" to fill Dave's shoes and never did.

[MAX]

Originally posted by FORD
Maybe you should try it yourself, since you manged one line already.

Nothing there inspires me. It's just that weak of material even by Hagar standards. :(

lol.

Maybe I spoke to soon cos now that you've posted the lyrics, that song 'tis pretty much a parody anyway. Yes, it's that bad.

[WARF]

your heavy metal crooner...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

[MAX]

Warf,

We could, can, would, should and better pick this song apart word by word. This 'tis absolutely The Chedd Rocker at his BEST or WORST, depending on our collective laugh track.

Just these alone have BLATANT homosexual overtones (To quote Seinfeld "Not that there's anything wrong with it" lmao!!!) EVERYWHERE... Not to insult the gay community but these lyrics (if we can even call them that?) are so sixth grade term "GAY!!!" This shit 'tis ludicrous.

"Tried to be your paper boy
Tried to be your boy scout

I'm a back-talkin' fighter
A silver bullet biter - PILLOW BITER!!!
I'm a flip flop slider"

Again, people who actually both like and admire such a tool beyond embarrass me. This shit 'tis sooooooo fucking gay and dumb.

BWUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

[binnie]

Sammy is a pillow biter!

Fuck that song is truly awful, and it seems like Tubby is loosing his voice!

[Romeo Delight]

Funny thing is, I bet More than half the hits to that site are from us making fun of him.

Dude is delusional thinking he is the shit...and because of us, LOL

[Romeo Delight]

Originally posted by MAX


"Tried to be your paper boy
Tried to be your boy scout

I'm a back-talkin' fighter
A silver bullet biter - PILLOW BITER!!!
I'm a flip flop slider"





:lol: :lol: :lol:

[Golden AWe]

"your oil man" sung to a man also sounds A BIT gay...

this is dedicated to Eddie right?

[ELVIS]

Better than that Last Van Hagar bullshit...

[Hardrock69]

As for him losing his voice, I refuse to have an opinion on it by wasting my time even dreaming of thinking about considering listening to it.

Fuck that flabby fuckheaded motherfucker.....

[binnie]

Wow it's a bad song, had to listen to it again just to remind myself why I hate him so much.

How does he have a record deal?

[DavidLeeNatra]

funny that it took you soooo long to find that masterpiece ;)

have seen it long ago...

[BITEYOASS]

Fucker is trying to sound like Toby Keith! LOL

[Terry]

Wow.

As lame as his lyrics in Van Hagar were, these are fookin' worse.

Can't even understand...I mean, tried to be your paperboy, tried to be your boyscout...tried to be your oil man, sunny honneymooner????

Think the flab covering his bovine cur has finally seeped into his cerebellum.

[WARF]

Originally posted by ELVIS
Better than that Last Van Hagar bullshit...

It's like comparing hard turds to diarrhea!

[DavidLeeNatra]

Originally posted by ELVIS
Better than that Last Van Hagar bullshit...

does that mean you listened to it??? :D

[ELVIS]

I let it play...

[ELVIS]

Oops...

[Seshmeister]

Originally posted by WARF
It's like comparing hard turds to diarrhea!


You've got me thinking now.

It's a tricky question, I suppose it really depends on the viscosity of the diarrhea. Are we talking just a watery shit at the appropriate time or an ongoing dash to the toilet every few minutes? Plus is it burny?

I think any sort of burny would immediately trumph hard turds.

More details please.

Cheers!

:gulp:

[ELVIS]

What time is it there ??


LMAO!

[binnie]

Hard Turds aren't as bad, at least you ain't gonna get caught short!

Can't believe I'm writing this!

[diamondsgirl]

It was bad enough when Hagar was ripping off Dave, but now he's ripping off Dr. Seuss. And Dave.

Will this fucker stop at nothing?

[MAX]

Originally posted by diamondsgirl
Will this fucker stop at nothing?

Nothing short of the end of an "All You Can Eat" buffet table until he's cleaned it.

[Shaun Ponsonby]

Shoulda put this in The Pen.

[Jurak]

Late...........or, early........it depends where you are..... :D

[guwapo_rocker]

Green Eggs and Ham......