Van Halen cups to be sold on tour.

[Atomic Dyver]

Possible press statement from Eddie:

"Yeah fuckin man. If anyone makes fuckin fun of fuckin Wolfie they better be wearing a fuckin cup man!!!! We'll be selling cups in the fuckin lobby with the fuckin VH logo on fuckin them cuz I will fuckin jump in the crowd and start a fuckin mad whirlwind of crotch kicks if anyfuckin one make fuckin fun of fuckin Wolfie man"

Dave: "Hey Eddie take it easy man....its not about your son"

Eddie: "Fuckin fuck you Dave. NO ONE TALKS TO ME LIKE THAT. YOU EVER TALK TO ME LIKE THAT AGAIN AND I'LL FUCKIN KICK YOU IN YOUR FUCKIN NUTS!!!!!!!"

Dave: "Here we go again....tell the midgets not to pack thier bags just yet.."

[PHOENIX]

Who is Eddie Van Halen?

[Sarge's Little Helper]

Who is Eddie Van Halen?

Eddie Van Heiniken is one quarter member of the group Sham and the Chirellas. He is a lying, two-faced prick who spends most of his time in 5150 bent over so that his bitch brother Alex can lick his asshole clean.

[ELVIS]

uhh hu hu hu hu hu hu hu hu


:D

[Atomic Dyver]

Eddie has been in sessions with a personal trainer to help maximize his crotch-kicking stregth. He has also warned that if he so much as sees a Mad Anthony Hot Sauce bottle at a show, a press conf...anywhere...this too will result in a crotch kicking frenzie.

[binnie]

Let the Soap Opera begin!

[bueno bob]

Who is Alex Van Halen?

[Sarge's Little Helper]

Who is Alex Van Halen?

Alex Van Halen is the paralyzed brother of Eddie Van Halen. He is strung up on strings, and manipulated like a puppet with his drum playing by Rick Allen's Left Arm. On the side, Alex has been known to pimp off his wives to David Lee Roth, only to have them divorce him the very next day.

[Atomic Dyver]

Its not a party till Ed throws a hissy fit.....its on its way. Eddie will have kicked many-a-crotch before this is over. Tempers will flair, people will be fired. I bet the midgets were given face masks, they've been know to steal Eddies smokes.

[Atomic Dyver]

Originally posted by bueno bob
Who is Alex Van Halen?


The only man alive that has not been threaten by the mighty EVH crotch aasault.

Is it possible he is a cripple because of an accidental EVH attack...?

[pjvan]

Originally posted by Atomic Dyver
Possible press statement from Eddie:

"Yeah fuckin man. If anyone makes fuckin fun of fuckin Wolfie they better be wearing a fuckin cup man!!!! We'll be selling cups in the fuckin lobby with the fuckin VH logo on fuckin them cuz I will fuckin jump in the crowd and start a fuckin mad whirlwind of crotch kicks if anyfuckin one make fuckin fun of fuckin Wolfie man"

Dave: "Hey Eddie take it easy man....its not about your son"

Eddie: "Fuckin fuck you Dave. NO ONE TALKS TO ME LIKE THAT. YOU EVER TALK TO ME LIKE THAT AGAIN AND I'LL FUCKIN KICK YOU IN YOUR FUCKIN NUTS!!!!!!!"

Dave: "Here we go again....tell the midgets not to pack thier bags just yet.."

DAMN! Somehow I can actually picture this press conference taking place.

[Roy Munson]

who is sammy hagar?

[Sarge's Little Helper]

who is sammy hagar?

David Lee Roth says that Sammy Hagar is a bridge drone troll. I think he is a complete whiney bitch who is deathly afraid of the success that Classic Van Halen had that he could never live up to. Bluntly put he is just an old angry man who lives in a delusional fantasy world in which Van Hagar sold 20 million more albums than Classic Van Halen. Every time he talks he utters nothing but lies and sounds like a sack of assholes. Sarge told me that Bette Midler and Sammy Hagar are the same person. For a laugh please ask me who Bette Midler is. Thanks for your time. ..

[Roy Munson]

who is bette midler?

[Sarge's Little Helper]

who is bette midler?

Bette Midler is an actress/singer that bears an uncanny resemblance to Sammy Hagar. .. based on both being fat, old, red hair and both have FLOPPY, SLOPPY BREASTS. Bette was in a popular movie called Beaches and Sammy Hagar is just a plain Beatch.Thanks for your time..

[PHOENIX]

http://www.cabowabo.com/gfx/cw_logo.jpg

[pjvan]

Originally posted by Sarge's Little Helper
David Lee Roth says that Sammy Hagar is a bridge drone troll. I think he is a complete whiney bitch who is deathly afraid of the success that Classic Van Halen had that he could never live up to. Bluntly put he is just an old angry man who lives in a delusional fantasy world in which Van Hagar sold 20 million more albums than Classic Van Halen. Every time he talks he utters nothing but lies and sounds like a sack of assholes. Sarge told me that Bette Midler and Sammy Hagar are the same person. For a laugh please ask me who Bette Midler is. Thanks for your time. ..

You know, up until the part about Bette and Spam being the same person, your description of the Fat Fucker could also describe Ed for the past 22 years.

[Atomic Dyver]

Originally posted by Roy Munson
who is sammy hagar?


Author of future muzak classics such as "I can't drive 55" and "wrong way to rock"

he is also the syphilis that almost destroyed Van Halen....ironically there have never been any reports of Eddie threatening him with Mortal Combat finishing move know as the EVH WHIRLWIND CROTCH KICK