Van Halen Caused Stock Market Slide

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  • LoungeMachine
    DIAMOND STATUS
    • Jul 2004
    • 32576

    Van Halen Caused Stock Market Slide

    Written by Buck E Filbert
    01 March 2007



    Stockbrokers and commodities dealers were devastated by the news that an, earlier announcements stating, Van Halen would be doing a forty city tour this summer, was premature.

    Industry insiders have leaked information regarding the reunion of David Lee Roth, Eddie Van Halen and Alex Van Halen. They just can't seem to see the forest through the trees. They hate each other like jealous school girls.

    This tour has the potential to break record after record in attendance with grosses in excess of 40 million dollars. It seems like 40 to 80 million dollars would be incentive to forgive and forget but not these hard headed grudge holders.

    It seems the age of the average stockbroker on the floor is just in at the heyday of Van Halen and the floor was so excited about the up coming gigs, when the news got out about the tour falling apart, everyone on the stock market floor just dropped whatever they were doing and went into mourning over this sad series of events.

    Since all business was suspended for a short period of time the market sank and was reported to be the worst day since 9-11.

    All for the love of a rock n roll icon.
    Originally posted by Kristy
    Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
    Originally posted by cadaverdog
    I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?
  • isthatTHUNDER?!
    Banned
    • Oct 2006
    • 105

    #2
    i'm down over 5 mill for the fucking week.

    Comment

    • Hummarstra
      Commando
      • Feb 2004
      • 1196

      #3
      They should have shorted the market like I did.

      Comment

      • ALinChainz
        DIAMOND STATUS
        • Jan 2004
        • 12092

        #4
        Originally posted by isthatTHUNDER?!
        i'm down over 5 mill for the fucking week.
        Then you're an idiot.

        And we all know you don't have two nickels to rub together, you have no education or job.

        We all what of yours IS rubbing together.

        Comment

        • IAMFUCKINGBACK!
          Roth Army Recruit
          • Feb 2007
          • 12

          #5
          I'm getting killed on it too.

          Comment

          • Atomic Dyver
            Head Fluffer
            • Mar 2004
            • 313

            #6
            When will they start jumpin out of buildings......

            Comment

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