Hi, My name is Lounge Machine

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  • LoungeMachine
    DIAMOND STATUS
    • Jul 2004
    • 32555

    Hi, My name is Lounge Machine

    Hola, fellow Rothtards....

    Those who need a refresher course on the spectacular Machine De Lounge, here it comes:

    I started back in 2003 on The Wall while the Army was down. I had never posted at any VH/DLR forum ever, and was screwing around online one night looking for DLR news. I had had a one-nighter with a girl who had been with DLR back in my 80's rocker days, and enjoyed posting the story about that encounter on The Wall.

    My first "friend" there was ALinCHainz. Mick and I hit it off quickly, exchanged info, and used to have alot of laughs at Joe Thunder's expense.

    I may be one of the ONLY people Sarge ever BANNED from The Wall

    Terry and Dan became good friends as well, and once the Army returned, they went over there, and I forgot about the whole scene.

    Until AL [Mick] kicked my ass over there.......

    Soon I discovered The Front Line, and my favorite new wack-job poster FORD.

    It was my new hangout, until Pojo, obviously DRUNK and not having his wits about him, MODDED me in the Fan Intro Forum.

    I pissed off enough newbies to get kicked upstairs to modding the Front Line with Nick, Cathedral, and Warham...... where I quickly QUIT over Warham being a big stinky poopie pants to me.

    Pojo, recognizing the incredible douchebag I was, refused to accept my resignation, and told me he hired me to stir shit up, so I better pull my tampon out and go back and stir shit up. And the rest, is RA history.

    I've gotten to witness the owning of JizzyStool by Dr. Love, one of the interwebs all-time great ownings, the rise and destruction of the Mighty Muff Thread, and countless skimishes, flame wars, and meltdowns.

    I always swore I'd blow my profile up at 20K, and call it a day, but Sarge is back, the RA has never sounded better, and I'm having too much fun to leave.

    So have a drink on me you fucking Rothtard rejects, and thanks to Mick, Pojo, FORD, Nick, and Sarge..... and everyone else I've grown to almost like here.

    Bastards,


    Last edited by LoungeMachine; 02-09-2009, 10:37 PM.
    Originally posted by Kristy
    Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
    Originally posted by cadaverdog
    I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?
  • Sarge's Little Helper
    Commando
    • Mar 2003
    • 1267

    #2
    Hi LoungeMachine and welcome to Roth Army Forums! We are a website created by fans of David Lee Roth for fans of David Lee Roth. IT’S THAT DAMN SIMPLE. The next beer is on us!
    "I decided to name my new band DLR because when you say David Lee Roth people think of an individual, but when you say DLR you think of a band. Its just like when you say Edward Van Halen, people think of an individual, but when you say Van Halen, you think of…David Lee Roth, baby!"!

    Comment

    • LoungeMachine
      DIAMOND STATUS
      • Jul 2004
      • 32555

      #3
      Originally posted by Sarge's Little Helper
      Hi LoungeMachine and welcome to Roth Army Forums! We are a website created by fans of David Lee Roth for fans of David Lee Roth. IT’S THAT DAMN SIMPLE. The next beer is on us!
      Wow, a whole beer.

      Cheap bastards.

      Originally posted by Kristy
      Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
      Originally posted by cadaverdog
      I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?

      Comment

      • Julius
        Foot Soldier
        • Jan 2004
        • 720

        #4
        Originally posted by Viking
        ....I'm generally an anti-social sonofabitch and would rather have rectal polyps removed with a nail clipper than be pleasant to anyone.
        Someone wrote almost the same exact thing about me in my high school yearbook.

        How odd.

        Comment

        • Va Beach VH Fan
          ROTH ARMY FOUNDER
          • Dec 2003
          • 17913

          #5
          Originally posted by Viking
          Hi, my name is Viking, and I'm a recovering moderator.
          Now THAT'S funny !!!!
          Eat Us And Smile - The Originals

          "I have a very belligerent enthusiasm or an enthusiastic belligerence. I’m an intellectual slut." - David Lee Roth

          "We are part of the, not just the culture, but the geography. Van Halen music goes along with like fries with the burger." - David Lee Roth

          Comment

          • LoungeMachine
            DIAMOND STATUS
            • Jul 2004
            • 32555

            #6
            Originally posted by Viking
            Hi, my name is Viking, and I'm a recovering moderator. I started posting here in 1999, back when the Internet still didn't have a lot of good porn on it. Sarge apparently approved of my rapier-like wit so much, he made me a mod here in Fan Intro with a big-titted chick named Melein, which really wasn't a fun job, because I'm generally an anti-social sonofabitch and would rather have rectal polyps removed with a nail clipper than be pleasant to anyone. Then I helped create The Front Line, and I used to mod it with ELVIS and FORD (who was actually fucking Melein at the time).

            I haven't been a mod for a while now. I feel much better. Even the voices in my head have stopped.
            No wonder you were de-modded.... you can't start your own threads.

            Originally posted by Kristy
            Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
            Originally posted by cadaverdog
            I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?

            Comment

            • knuckleboner
              Crazy Ass Mofo
              • Jan 2004
              • 2927

              #7
              Originally posted by LoungeMachine
              Wow, a whole beer.

              Cheap bastards.

              then have another one on the knuckleboner. i think i've got like half a case left...

              Comment

              • Guitar Shark
                ROTH ARMY SUPREME
                • Jan 2004
                • 7576

                #8
                Originally posted by LoungeMachine
                No wonder you were de-modded.... you can't start your own threads.
                Fixed.

                Pretty cool feature I must say...
                ROTH ARMY MILITIA


                Originally posted by EAT MY ASSHOLE
                Sharky sometimes needs things spelled out for him in explicit, specific detail. I used to think it was a lawyer thing, but over time it became more and more evident that he's merely someone's idiot twin.

                Comment

                • LoungeMachine
                  DIAMOND STATUS
                  • Jul 2004
                  • 32555

                  #9
                  Originally posted by knuckleboner
                  then have another one on the knuckleboner. i think i've got like half a case left...


                  Listen, bitch.... I tried to make good on our bet, and you refused.





                  Originally posted by Kristy
                  Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
                  Originally posted by cadaverdog
                  I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?

                  Comment

                  • chefcraig
                    DIAMOND STATUS
                    • Apr 2004
                    • 12172

                    #10
                    Ahem, LM..what with the thread and all, I felt this needed to be addressed...

                    Everytime kwame knocks upon my door to use my bathroom (so much to be said for roughing it via the "camping life" in the local public park), he complains about this numb-skull. Surely, with your moderative powers, you can do something to end this caterwauling nuisance.

                    Quite frankly, it scares the swans, ducks and small children. And really, the stench...

                    Last edited by chefcraig; 02-10-2009, 02:09 AM.









                    “The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.”
                    ― Stephen Hawking

                    Comment

                    • LoungeMachine
                      DIAMOND STATUS
                      • Jul 2004
                      • 32555

                      #11
                      I just think it was nice of you Chef to give our friend some clean, dry, white socks.

                      Pay it forward, brother.

                      Originally posted by Kristy
                      Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
                      Originally posted by cadaverdog
                      I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?

                      Comment

                      • chefcraig
                        DIAMOND STATUS
                        • Apr 2004
                        • 12172

                        #12
                        Originally posted by LoungeMachine
                        I just think it was nice of you Chef to give our friend some clean, dry, white socks.

                        Pay it forward, brother.

                        Fuck you. They belonged to my first wife. I'll have to live with that utterly frightening memory forever.









                        “The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.”
                        ― Stephen Hawking

                        Comment

                        • LoungeMachine
                          DIAMOND STATUS
                          • Jul 2004
                          • 32555

                          #13
                          Those were socks your wife was wearing?

                          Always thought she was just too lazy to shave.

                          Originally posted by Kristy
                          Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
                          Originally posted by cadaverdog
                          I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?

                          Comment

                          • chefcraig
                            DIAMOND STATUS
                            • Apr 2004
                            • 12172

                            #14
                            Originally posted by LoungeMachine
                            Those were socks your wife was wearing?

                            Always thought she was just too lazy to shave.

                            Ever attempt to grin and go along with something that was extremely uncomfortable? Then have the other person question your happiness?

                            One Christmas, I bought her an electric razor that could be used in the shower, OK? We got divorced. Guess you can figure out how well that investment went.









                            “The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.”
                            ― Stephen Hawking

                            Comment

                            • LoungeMachine
                              DIAMOND STATUS
                              • Jul 2004
                              • 32555

                              #15
                              An electric razor for Christmas?

                              We guys would love that...... women are wired to take that gift personally, and hold it against you until you choke on the guilt.



                              No wonder she's an ex-wife.
                              Originally posted by Kristy
                              Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
                              Originally posted by cadaverdog
                              I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?

                              Comment

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