Robertson: “God Even Angrier with Chile than Haiti"

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  • FORD
    ROTH ARMY MODERATOR

    • Jan 2004
    • 58755

    Robertson: “God Even Angrier with Chile than Haiti"

    Robertson: “God Even Angrier with Chile than Haiti"


    Citing what he described as the “the persecution of a great hero who rid their land of Godless communists” as a possible cause, prominent TV evangelist and amateur seismologist Pat Robertson today argued that the 8.8 magnitude of the earthquake that struck Chile early this morning should serve as a warning to the population that “God is even angrier with them than he is with the people of Haiti.”

    “If I had to guess, I’d say it must have to do with Chile’s persecution and attempted prosecution of their great former leader, and a personal hero of mine, Augusto Pinochet – who, it should be noted, had never been convicted of a crime when the Lord called him home three years ago.” The popular host of ‘The 700 Club’ and longtime bingo circuit icon also added, “General Pinochet not only assisted the CIA in the overthrow of Chile’s Marxist government, but is widely credited with personally arranging the meetings of hundreds, perhaps thousands, of his countrymen with Jesus.”

    General Pinochet, who spent the last eight years of his life fighting prosecution on human rights and other charges before succumbing to congestive heart failure in December 2006, could not be reached for comment, even by Robertson. The General–turned-Dictator has long been considered a transformative figure in the field of Crimes Against Humanity as a result of his landmark policy of ‘Forced Disappearance’, and was even honored in 1998 with the first-ever arrest warrant for a former head of state under the principle of ‘universal jurisdiction’ by Spanish Judge Baltasar Garzon, who is currently investigating former Bush Administration officials for War Crimes and Crimes Against Humanity.

    For his part, Robertson, who reportedly lobbied then-President George W. Bush on behalf of former Liberian Dictator and accused Human Rights criminal Charles Taylor in exchange for lucrative gold mining contracts, says that he is “praying that the people of Chile will heed this warning, and never again blaspheme against God and international free-market commerce by nationalizing their most precious natural resources.”


    Robertson: ?God Even Angrier with Chile than Haiti" - The Desperate Blogger - Open Salon
    Eat Us And Smile

    Cenk For America 2024!!

    Justice Democrats


    "If the American people had ever known the truth about what we (the BCE) have done to this nation, we would be chased down in the streets and lynched." - Poppy Bush, 1992
  • chefcraig
    DIAMOND STATUS
    • Apr 2004
    • 12172

    #2
    OK, even I can grasp this: Although the quake was stronger in sheer force than the one that crippled Haiti, the damage to Chile was considerably less. So according to Pat Robertson, the Lord's wrath essentially boils down not to achievement through symbolism, but through numbers on the Richter scale.

    This does make you wonder why the Almighty is so righteously pissed off at trailer parks, though.









    “The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.”
    ― Stephen Hawking

    Comment

    • Kristy
      DIAMOND STATUS
      • Aug 2004
      • 16338

      #3
      Does God now hate France, too?

      France24 - Deadly Atlantic storm 'Xynthia' batters Western Europe

      Comment

      • Anonymous
        Banned
        • May 2004
        • 12707

        #4
        EVERYONE hates France.

        By the way, the island of Madeira suffered a flood with lots of people dying and shit.

        It's like the Earth is scratching itself.

        Nice, isn't it?

        Cheers! :bottle:

        Comment

        • LoungeMachine
          DIAMOND STATUS
          • Jul 2004
          • 32555

          #5
          God hates Van Halen too I suppose.......

          Originally posted by Kristy
          Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
          Originally posted by cadaverdog
          I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?

          Comment

          • chefcraig
            DIAMOND STATUS
            • Apr 2004
            • 12172

            #6
            Originally posted by LoungeMachine
            God hates Van Halen too I suppose.......
            Except for a period spanning the mid 80s thru today, God has loved Van Halen. The fans of the band however, not so much.









            “The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.”
            ― Stephen Hawking

            Comment

            • LoungeMachine
              DIAMOND STATUS
              • Jul 2004
              • 32555

              #7
              A vengeful God plagued the band with a swarm of terrible singers after The Prophet David was cast from the flock....

              God's wrath bestowed terrible floods upon the eyes and ears of the chosen among us.....

              God works in mysterious ways you say?

              I'll say.

              Originally posted by Kristy
              Dude, what in the fuck is wrong with you? I'm full of hate and I do drugs.
              Originally posted by cadaverdog
              I posted under aliases and I jerk off with a sock. Anything else to add?

              Comment

              • sadaist
                TOASTMASTER GENERAL
                • Jul 2004
                • 11625

                #8
                It must be that God is mad at Haiti & Chile. He was suspiciously absent from We Are The World II. And God does not need Auto-Tune.
                “Great losses often bring only a numb shock. To truly plunge a victim into misery, you must overwhelm him with many small sufferings.”

                Comment

                • FORD
                  ROTH ARMY MODERATOR

                  • Jan 2004
                  • 58755

                  #9
                  Originally posted by LoungeMachine
                  God hates Van Halen too I suppose.......

                  Would His Son post here, if He did?
                  Eat Us And Smile

                  Cenk For America 2024!!

                  Justice Democrats


                  "If the American people had ever known the truth about what we (the BCE) have done to this nation, we would be chased down in the streets and lynched." - Poppy Bush, 1992

                  Comment

                  • Kristy
                    DIAMOND STATUS
                    • Aug 2004
                    • 16338

                    #10
                    Originally posted by sadaist
                    It must be that God is mad at Haiti & Chile. He was suspiciously absent from We Are The World II. And God does not need Auto-Tune.
                    Aw, but look for the 'We Are The World Part III' where every forgotten rapper, grunge artist, ex boy band patriot, and "nu metal" act will join Qunicy and Co for another rendition of the same ol song while those directly affected from such a disaster will be living on the street rain falling hard upon their heads wondering why they can't get any kind of international help without someone's bloated ego getting in the way.

                    Please, 'Candle In The Wind 1997' should have been the end of it right there.

                    Comment

                    • chefcraig
                      DIAMOND STATUS
                      • Apr 2004
                      • 12172

                      #11
                      Originally posted by Kristy
                      Aw, but look for the 'We Are The World Part III' where every forgotten rapper, grunge artist, ex boy band patriot, and "nu metal" act will join Qunicy and Co for another rendition of the same ol song while those directly affected from such a disaster will be living on the street rain falling hard upon their heads wondering why they can't get any kind of international help without someone's bloated ego getting in the way.
                      The Latin version is on it's way...

                      Shakira adds voice to Spanish "We Are the World"

                      MIAMI — Shakira and Ricky Martin are among the artists adding their voices to a Spanish-language adaptation of "We Are the World" to raise money for Haiti earthquake relief.

                      The song will first air Monday on Univision's "The Cristina Show." It was produced by Emilio Estefan, Quincy Jones and Univision, under the auspices of the We Are The World Foundation.

                      The foundation said all proceeds will be used to help Haiti recover from a devastating Jan. 12 quake.

                      Gloria Estefan penned the adaptation. Other participants include Carlos Santana, Chayanne, David Archuleta, Juan Luis Guerra and Juanes.

                      The original "We Are the World" in 1985 raised more than $30 million for African hunger relief. Some 80 artists recently recorded a 25th anniversary version benefiting Haiti.


                      The Associated Press: Shakira adds voice to Spanish "We Are the World"









                      “The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.”
                      ― Stephen Hawking

                      Comment

                      • Kristy
                        DIAMOND STATUS
                        • Aug 2004
                        • 16338

                        #12
                        Great. Just fucking great. Nothing says "save my failing career" then milking it it off of another's suffering. The day I see Shakira or Gloria Estefan digging ditches with shovels and no camera crews for those without homes to have a place to shit in will be the day I'll buy their crappy record.

                        Geddit? Crappy...

                        Comment

                        • Nickdfresh
                          SUPER MODERATOR

                          • Oct 2004
                          • 49127

                          #13
                          Good thing that Robertson's "personal hero" is a cunt tin-pot general who authorized the bestial raping of women political prisoners in his interrogation centers. I mean, what would Jesus do?

                          My Son of God would take power and murder his enemies extra-judicially! Praise Jesus! For Jesus saith, "if you're not with us, we'll have a dog rape your girlfriend while we summarily execute thy."

                          Comment

                          • BITEYOASS
                            ROTH ARMY ELITE
                            • Jan 2004
                            • 6531

                            #14
                            Would Pat Robertson please die already so I can piss on his grave?!?!?

                            Comment

                            • Seshmeister
                              ROTH ARMY WEBMASTER

                              • Oct 2003
                              • 35159

                              #15
                              Being limited to earthquakes as a way to show his annonyance must be quite frustrating for the supreme creator.

                              During WWII he must have been jumping up and down in frustration at the fact that Germany isn't on any tectonic faults.

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