PDA

View Full Version : That Bieber Kids a Little CROOK



GAR
08-15-2010, 05:42 AM
I've been plodding my way thru the youtubes and back, and on my travels somethings' come up.

Kept hearing about this phenom Justin Bieber kid, who is suddenly this mega-international superstar hit wonder. But for what reason? What's he have that the hairless dancing girls don't that gives the guy so much credit?

So I click on this video they're talking about "Baby" and I'm thinking: there is no possible way in earthly physics this kid with this shitty little video has two-hundred fifty fucking million view hits. This number is fake!

The video premise is fairly simple: his group of multi-racial (it's Universal Def Jam, 'kay) preteen boys are hitting on a likewise group of preteen girls in a bowling alley, and his subjective is avoiding his singing to her. He connects by chasing her around the place and doing ethnic dance moves, all over Universal City Walk.

The video might have cost 40 grand for the days' use after-hours. It's uncomplicated fluff with shots of him pantomiming faggy poses in the lobby of the movieplex alone.

There are no explosions, no FX. No monsters, no lasers, no smoke pots. There's no CGI or 3D.

I looked at the Views numbers and I thought hmm, is this the new Digital-Age Payola? Then I reflected on my days back at Overture.com and how over there we had special click-fraud units setup to intentionally drive the customers' perclick account credit into nothingness. We'd setup virtual machines on the network and just drain 'em down down down, into that ring of fire.

Figure out where I'm going with this one? Universal.. Def Jam.. okay, so I checked Def Jam out for payola and WOW theres' the precedent!

"Universal settles 12m fine"
"Largest payola scandal 12Mil".. shit like this.

Here's what I'm saying: while I admit Justin Bieber is just about the most harmless, cutest little Dudeman and I just wanna pinch the fuck out of his cheeks and shit while screaming "Ooh Just-Ennnn" in falsetto at the top of my lungs, my gut feeling is bribing the Youtubes is gonna become the easiest form of media corruption that's ever fucking been.

You know why? NOBODY is auditing. Because nobody cares, they're not a broadcaster and payola laws don't apply!

Well, here's the deal for you.. there's alot of sponsored (read: click ads, my former employ remember - shit I know bout kay) adverts up there, but now what they're doing is feeding those FLV source file codes AFTER the Advertiser's FLV codes.. and then charging everyone with the floated notion that the Youtubes is a model portal to get you more views, so now you have to pay more.

This is pretty fucked up and its so simple to understand when you consider it's done with one little figure: the damned views count!

Oh thats' right.. no longer do you have to merge incompatible OS databases to attack behind numerous FAKE Ip's nonono fuck that. Just diddle the number!

I'm telling you, this number is FAKE as the day is long

Fake fake fake. Justin Bieber's management's on it, that ghetto thugpack label's in on it and Universal HAS GOT to be in on this, too!

This all came to my attention by someone linking that "Bieber Hit With Waterbottle" clip, otherwise I wouldn't have bother to care to look this stupid shit up. But now I've seen it - a guy who KNOWS how to roast an account - and because I know how this gets done in the backroom I'm calling FOUL on the beast.

Justin Beiber, youre a little crook. Just karaoke your little heart out to what the soundsystem puts out, never mind there's a backline of drooling queer hiphop dancers staring down your shorts behind you while you're doing the motions and just might last another year to see your replacement.

FORD
08-15-2010, 05:47 AM
It's all Jerry Only's fault. He's about to make this kid the new vocalist for the ShitFits......

http://img15.imageshack.us/img15/9344/bieberzigthumb.jpg

Diamondjimi
08-15-2010, 08:04 PM
Here's what I'm saying: while I admit Justin Bieber is just about the most harmless, cutest little Dudeman and I just wanna pinch the fuck out of his cheeks and shit while screaming "Ooh Just-Ennnn" in falsetto at the top of my lungs.

:finger-attitude: http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20071017205427/uncyclopedia/images/d/d5/Pedobear.png

kwame k
08-15-2010, 08:06 PM
So Clay, do you want to pee on him or give him Hot Wheels you've stuck up your ass?

sadaist
08-15-2010, 11:13 PM
That Bieber Kids a Little CROOK



I thought you were going to say because he stole your heart. Carry on.

Diamondjimi
08-16-2010, 01:49 AM
http://media.giantbomb.com/uploads/1/19555/1077614-nice_thread_super.png

Dave's Bitch
08-16-2010, 02:00 AM
<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/0e50vqY7Szo?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/0e50vqY7Szo?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>

This vid is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!

GAR
08-16-2010, 02:37 AM
<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/FMRg11hQLds?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/FMRg11hQLds?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>

THIS is the best version, the one with the sounds from the PC game"Quake" I luvvit luvvit luvvit