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Dear Fans, .......from Dave.

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  • #1

    Dear Fans, .......from Dave.

    Dear All,.
    ...........Whoa look at all the people hear tonight!!!!!!!!!!I'll be just a moment so you all can get back to doing the deed in no time.Just wanted to throw a few shouts out to all the peeps.I had a few thoughts to get off my chest and I figured why not finaly address my army,the general has returned.Though I must say thank you for all the support "It's About Time" I confessed a few sins to my kin.I've been a fraud my pretties and I aim to cum clean.I quit the greatest show on earth because for some fucking reason I thought I was the band.The brothers were right.I went to go make a movie,"Crazy from the Heat!!".....anybody see it?........Yep,about as bad as the album,then I thought I'd try music again,you all love me........but for some reason where is "my army" buying my records or going to see my pathetic shows.All my records suck,haven't sold shit since I left the brothers.When was the last time Somebody wanted to interview me,or put me on a magazine cover?Then I tried Vegas?!?What the fuck was I thinking with that mambo act?"KID" and his boys laughed me out of town!!Then I put out more bad music that nobody bought!!!!Then I tried country..............stop laughing I know.Then I got busted for a dime bag in N.Y..Next,I sucked Eddie's dick to get back in the band only to record 2 horrible songs,that they had to do over and over again to get my shot voice on tape,only to fuck it up again and again!!!!!!Man I can't sing...........did you cats catch me at the "US FESTIVAL in 83?"...............shit was I bad!!!I can't sing,never could hell I even stole my whole act from JIM "DANDY" MANGRUM for god's sake!!!!!!!So please army forget about me go see Sam and the brothers..............Sam did what I couldn't,he sings,he has a career,I never had a #1 record with the boys,Sam got 5 and a grammy!!Fuck he even has HAIR!!Where did my hair go!!!!!!!!If you really want to see me I get about 100 people per show where ever I go so tickets are still available............................but the brothers will be playing before a million people this summer.I think I'll go bomb out with something else like acting my peeps.................hell I might even be good at it,I've been acting like a ROCK STAR ALL these years!!!!!!!!So good bye friends of the army.....................,I wish you the best!!
    Dave Roth

    p.s............."Right Now"........I wish I had my old job back,anf hair,and a voice.and that somebody still wanted to interview me!!!!!!"
    Tags: dave, dear, fans
  • #2
    Right now, you wish you were a Vegas show girl, instead of a Ft Lauderdale crackhead transvestite whore.
    Eat Us And Smile

    Cenk For America 2024!!

    Justice Democrats


    "If the American people had ever known the truth about what we (the BCE) have done to this nation, we would be chased down in the streets and lynched." - Poppy Bush, 1992

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    • #3
      That was fantastic. Really....all the double entendre's, gappage, shit for brains composition etc. I rifled through it in about a minute or maybe ten fucking hours....it really was that great. I'm guessing probably 45 minutes of rubbing your fucking knees and giggling. You gotta fill that gap man.

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      • #4
        keep dreaming asshole , you think that this kind of shits gonna change your misserable life i don't think so , you are a fuckin' sheep n' yoour fuckin' band it's nothin' since dave left the band , so stop postin' this kind of shit in here , keep this on you mind : NO MATTER WHAT ALL THE VAN HAGAR SHEEPS OR FANS DO OR SAY """DAVE ALWAYS WILL BE MUCH MUCH BETTER THAN SPAMMY N' NOBODY OF YOU CAN CHANGE THAT OK """ SO YOU N' ALL THE SHEEPS GO TO YOU FUCKIN' GREAT CONCERT KEEP DREAMIN' THAT SPAMMY IS BETTER THAN DAVE N' DON'T CAME TO FUCK US OK.
        "life can be good with the right people"- andi deris

        Woman Of Dark Desires
        http://i173.photobucket.com/albums/w...9b5fac7ede.jpg

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        • #5
          kid you have done it again.

          Each and every post here just proofes you´re plain dumb, 37 times CONGRATULATIONS kid.

          What´s the name of that trailer-park you are living somewhere around vegas

          You are over and out kid
          some kinda clown

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          • #6
            kidvegas, did you really try with that post ? I sense the apex, the absolute pinnacle of your achievement was represented by this post.

            Im really so very sorry..

            Tragic...
            BABY PANA 2 IS Coming !! All across the land, let the love and beer flow !
            Love ya Mary Frances!

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            • #7
              Re: Dear Fans, .......from Dave.

              Originally posted by kidvegas
              Dear All,
              Deleted posters spew of bandwidth consuming crap..gs
              <center>Ya know, KudVagina....if you would quit hanging out in men's bathrooms, getting high off smelling and eating crap all day long, maybe you wouldn't make such stupid clueless comments. - Roth Army FuckStick Award Recipient

              </center>
              Last edited by gslinger; 06-10-2004, 06:32 AM.
              <center>Accept Only Van <strike>Halen</strike> Roth Classic!
              "Everyday becomes a better Diamond Dave day"</center><center>http://img11.imageshack.us/img11/6002/03Way.jpg
              </center><marquee><b><font color=Blue><size=+4>The 2004 Spammy “Eat It & Puke” Van ReHash Tour * Coming to a "This Suit is You" Store In Your Tiny Little Neighborhood. Brought to you by the Hemlock Society, Underground Bulemics United, PUTR - People for the Unethical Treatment of Rockfans, & a Special Message from Eddie & Alex Van Halen - Fuck you guyssss!!!!! </size></font></b></marquee></font>
              <center>
              "Those cats had me so beat down & confused, made the cancer seem like a tiny zit on my ass..I don't have a clue what's going on"-EVH</center>
              <center>Click>"Hot Chicks for Dave" & "Dave’s Cavalcade of Bimbos"</center>

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              • #8
                funny part is he seems to spend alot of time with DLR albums.

                another DLR fan, welcome to the forums!
                "I've been rich and I've been poor....rich is better, totally better"

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                • #9
                  Did you see the Sam quote yesterday from the USA Today? Sam called Van Halen's history with Dave the best musical catalog on the planet.

                  And the hell of it is that no one here at the army had to put words in his mouth.

                  So KidVegas, what do you do when your red-rockin' hero admits to being #2?


                  Hollywood Jesus...
                  "The Lord tells me he can get me out of this mess. But, he's pretty sure you're fucked."
                  "Float like a butterfly. Sting like a B-52." - DLR=VH=
                  "Rejoice in the wife of your youth. May her breasts satisfy you always." Proverbs 5:18-19.

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                  • #10
                    the only thing i agree with is the part about borrowing some of his early stage presence from jim mangrum. i have always been a dlr fan, but in the early days of the band i too noticed the impression left by the black oak arkansas front man, that is not at all a bad thing, i am just glad i was not the only one who saw that. As far as today, i personally glad to see dlr cut off the locks and died his hair back to it's natural color, the way he looks today is how i would want to see him represent on stage with vh.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by rickipoint2002
                      the only thing i agree with is the part about borrowing some of his early stage presence from jim mangrum. i have always been a dlr fan, but in the early days of the band i too noticed the impression left by the black oak arkansas front man, that is not at all a bad thing, i am just glad i was not the only one who saw that. As far as today, i personally glad to see dlr cut off the locks and died his hair back to it's natural color, the way he looks today is how i would want to see him represent on stage with vh.
                      I NEVER WANT TO SEE DLR WITH VAN HALEN EVER AGAIN THEY SUCK , DLR'S NEW BAND SMOKES EM , EDDIE CANT PLAY LIKE HE USED TO , THE BROS CANT EVEN SING VERY GOOD OR PLAY.
                      I THINK IF DLR WENT BACK TO VAN HALEN IT WOULD SUCK THE WAY THINGS ARE NOW ARE FINE. LET VH GO DOWN ON THERE OWN EVERYONE KNOWS THEY SUCK!!! , AND NOT TAKE DAVE DOWN WITH EM.
                      DAVE REPRESENT VH WITH THEM?? , YOUVE GOT IT BACKWARDS ITS DLR IS VH , IF YOU DONT BELEIVE THAT , MAYBE YOU THINK ITS CAUSE EDDIE USED TO BE SO GOOD ,YEA HE WAS !!! 'WAS' THIS IS MY OPINION AND I PRACTICALLY PLAY GUITAR FOR A LIVING....DAVE CONTINUED ON , VH JUST WENT DOWNHILL, THE WAY THINGS ARE NOW, ARE FINE .

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                      • #12
                        Dave continued on?To what?Look it idiots.............Dave has NEVER DONE AN ORIGINAL THING IN HIS LIFE!!!!!!!!!!Watch the old Black Oak Arkansas footage,that's where Dave got his act!!!!!!!!!!!ED wrote all the music........Dave does cover tunes!!!!!!!!!He's a nobody,when was the last time he was on the cover of a mag?Ed's on the cover and it sells out this month!!!!!!!!
                        KID VEGAS..................God Bless!

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                        • #13
                          IT NEVER CEASES TO AMAZE ME, THE STUPID FUCKING SHIT THAT COMES OUT OF THESE PEOPLES MOUTHES. VAN HALEN IS AND ONLY IS
                          DAVE,ED,ALEX AND MIKEY. THERE WAS NEVER ANY UPROAR TO BRING SHIRLEY HAGAR OR GARY CHERONE BACK. ITS' ALWAYS BEEN ABOUT ONE THING THE"ORIGINAL VAN HALEN".

                          "RIGHT NOW" EDDIES THINKING I FUCKED UP

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                          • #14
                            Yep, I think Kid Lauderdale has peaked. Nowhere to go but down from here, on Sam that is. Sheep!

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                            • #15
                              kidvegas will be appearing on
                              jerry springer, 5/16/04,
                              'transvestite love triangles'
                              be sure to tune in.

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